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Everyone can post, just add one sentence or paragraph to the story, continuing it as you go, no matter how silly, dark, weird, offbeat or whacko it goes.
I'll start it off.
Jimmy was rather surprised when he found himself suddenly sitting in class, especially since the last thing he remembered was dreading the test the next morning while climbing into bed. It was bad enough that the subject was ancient Egyptian algebra, one he hated vehemently. The fact that it was the one class he was failing miserably only made it worse.
But to think that he'd have to be in there during his 15th birthday and none of his family had noticed only made him feel like the day was such a wash. His older sister was getting married this weekend and all the attention was focused on that. Typical for Linda to steal his thunder. Like she couldn't wait until after school was out to get married. What's the big hurry?
So he had to blink a few times, trying to figure out how he'd completely lost all clue of how he'd gotten from bed to school. He couldn't have forgotten his whole morning routine, or walking to the bus stop. He hoped he'd remembered to put on underarm deodorant, not wanting to have a repeat of that smelly sweat incident when he'd turned 13. He wondered if he'd actually eaten breakfast.
But wait....why was everyone in class pointing and giggling at him?
NEXT!
It's not the wolf you see you should fear, but all the ones he howls with. Don't be afraid of the song, but don't piss off the choir.
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But wait ... why was everyone in class pointing and giggling at him?
Or ... Jimmy looking about him was hoping that it just might be someone else they were centering out? Nope, it's gotta be me ... and, er, what the hell? What are all these ... ? Hot damn! They do appear (as Jimmy picks one of them up and fingers it circumspectly) to be condoms without their protective foil liners Why are they stacked up in front of me like so many mini-roundels of Baby Bell processed cheese without their outer shell?
Upon closer examination I see the adjacent pile of cardboard sleeves, just like those they used to use when packaging shoe-laces back in the day, wondering whatever they were used for, and and what appears to be match-boxes the likes of which hold those wooden strikers my grandfather was so fond of. Wait .. what does this say? "Three choice latex condoms. One size fits all. 35-cents" Whoa, now just wait a minute ... 35-cents? That's more like $6.95 at the local chemists ... where did all these come from, and why are they here in front of me and why during what is supposed to be a final exam on Egyptian algebra before semester ends and the summer holidays begin?
The giggling and the finger pointing hasn't abated one iota, with it likely having gotten worse, and I begin to seriously look at those around me and the room itself, only to realize that ...
NEXT!
[Updated on: Tue, 03 May 2011 23:25]
"... comme recherché qu'un délice callipygian"
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kiwi
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Likes it here |
Location: New Zealand
Registered: August 2009
Messages: 317
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. . . he'd never seen this room, or any of these laughing hyenas, before - never in his life! What was going on?
Wait a minute! The family forgot his birthday because his airhead sister was getting married? What was his name again? Molly Ringwald? And, ancient Egyptian algebra? What sort of oddball subject is that? Ordinary algebra is bad enough, who cares how the old Egyptians did it?
Worse yet, unwrapped condoms in the classroom? No, this had to be a dream, didn't it? Life was weird, but not that much. There was one sure way of knowing if he was dreaming, he'd be naked in school, wouldn't he?
He looked down and . . . "Oh, Damm!"
Next!
Commas matter - 'Party on Dudes' is not the same as 'Party on, Dudes'
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Jimmy's cheeks flushed and he felt faint. The world twisted and he felt himself falling, just as his eyes fell on the smiling face of Caleb, that cute.....
Jimmy sat up suddenly in bed, the sheets drenched in sweat. The giggles from his dream seemed to echo around in his mind. That and the image of Caleb's face. Why had he been finding himself thinking about Caleb so much lately? And why when he thought about Caleb was he always getting....?
"Jimmy! Are you up yet?" his mothers voice drifted up the stairs with that intensifying quality that told him she was climbing up as she ranted. "You're going to be late again! I can't take you in this morning, so if you miss the bus you'll have to walk it. Do you hear me?" she asked from outside his door.
NEXT!
It's not the wolf you see you should fear, but all the ones he howls with. Don't be afraid of the song, but don't piss off the choir.
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DesDownunder
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Likes it here |
Location: Adelaide, South Australia
Registered: September 2010
Messages: 127
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"Okay, Mum, I'm up," he shouted to his mother as he looked between his legs. Yes, 'up' was the right word, but he would have no chance to do anything about that right now, he had a bus to catch and Egyptian algebra to think about and the images of ancient Egyptian men in mini skirts flooded his mind. It was the reason he had decided on taking the class.
Jimmy had tried to convince his sister to have an Egyptian theme for her wedding, but she refused. He thought it would have been cool to have the nuptials in a pyramid shaped tent with lots half naked young men serving the guests. But her future husband had said no -another dream gone.
Yes, Jimmy was a dreamer and these are the tales of his dreams; dreams that would change his life. He had no idea that Egyptian algebra was riddled with the secrets of the ancient people, but soon he would discover the curses and the blessings they concealed in his dreams.
Firstly however, he had to deal with the reality of...
Next..
[Updated on: Tue, 03 May 2011 17:20]
DesDownunder
Call me naive if you want, but life without trust in the goodness of others would be intolerable.
Religious indoctrination: It gets better, without it.
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13750
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... the fact that he'd left his belt in his room, and he was halfway down the stairs as his trousers reached his ankles, hog-tying him. He tripped and flew the remainder of the stairs, arms outstretched, perplexedly thinking of algebra, when, suddenly, "Pouf!"
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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saben
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On fire! |
Registered: May 2003
Messages: 1537
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An older boy with thick rimmed glasses and brown hair that failed to conceal a lightning shaped scar appeared in front of him.
"Hello!" the boy said cheerily, "I'm Harry Potter and I'm here to escort you to Hogwarts. Normally you're enrolled at 11, but it looks like with all the trouble with Voldemort you somehow slipped under the radar."
Suddenly there was a loud noise and...
Look at this tree. I cannot make it blossom when it suits me nor make it bear fruit before its time [...] No matter what you do, that seed will grow to be a peach tree. You may wish for an apple or an orange, but you will get a peach.
Master Oogway
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DesDownunder
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Likes it here |
Location: Adelaide, South Australia
Registered: September 2010
Messages: 127
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...I realised I was hallucinating as my mum dropped the frying pan with fried eggs and bacon in it. I stood up from where I fell and looked at the two eggs with a rasher of bacon between them on the kitchen floor. I thought my mum was going to burst into tears as she surveyed the mess, so I told her not to worry about it as it wouldn't have lived anyway, because the eyes were too far apart.
We both burst out laughing. I grabbed my coat and told her I wasn't hungry. She pressed some money into my hand and I kissed her on the cheek.
"I'll see you tonight," I told her as I left the house. I wanted to get to school to find Caleb. I wondered why I kept thinking about him. I needed to get a grip on myself in more ways then one, and as I thought about him, I saw the bus coming over the hill, down the street and drove straight passed me. I uttered what I thought was a fake ancient Egyptian curse at the bus. I would have to walk to school.
When I arrived at the school, Caleb came running over to me and said, "Thank Heavens you are safe. Did you hear what happened to the school bus?"
DesDownunder
Call me naive if you want, but life without trust in the goodness of others would be intolerable.
Religious indoctrination: It gets better, without it.
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kiwi
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Likes it here |
Location: New Zealand
Registered: August 2009
Messages: 317
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What happened to the friggin' bus? Inquiring minds want to know!
Commas matter - 'Party on Dudes' is not the same as 'Party on, Dudes'
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DesDownunder
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Likes it here |
Location: Adelaide, South Australia
Registered: September 2010
Messages: 127
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Me too, I wanna know what happened to the friggin' bus.
Do I have to write the next installment? It's supposed to be someone else.
C'mon, it doesn't have to be logical, reasonable or even fasionable...well perhaps fashion conscious might be desirable for our American readers.
I didn't say that. ;-D
Get your hands on the keyboard and type.
I'll offer not to sleep with the person who thinks up the best posts, if that is any encouragement for you all.
NEXT!
DesDownunder
Call me naive if you want, but life without trust in the goodness of others would be intolerable.
Religious indoctrination: It gets better, without it.
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... somewhat I expect, and definitely feeling, alarmed and uncertain about what I was going to hear from my friend Caleb.
"You know that great huge Billboard ... the one with the ever-changing messages that cycles through, oh damn I don't know how many advertisements ... the one on top of that cliff on the canyon road?" gushes Caleb, "Well apparently it's got some new fangled ad about boys being boys, or something, and them kissing and fondling one another and all ... and well .. the bus-driver got so shaken up by what he saw that he missed that first hair-pin turn and the bus plummeted off the shoulder and rolled over and down the wash until it landed mired in the river below."
"News reports are saying ..."
NEXT, please
"... comme recherché qu'un délice callipygian"
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"That doesn't make any sense," Jimmy replied, looking straight ahead at Caleb. "Unless you were on the bus, talking to the driver, how could anyone know what made him go off a cliff on purpose, if that's even what happened. It was probably an accident," Jimmy finished, turning away slightly. He'd remembered thinking that Egyptian curse at the bus as it drove by him, but that sort of thing doesn't happen either. There was fantasy and there was reality, and the two don't mix. Right?
"Dude, that has to be the reason. That sign is kinda...graphic!" Caleb said with that dopey half grin of his.
"It's a bill board, it's supposed to be graphic. Ugh! I'm gonna be late."
"Just a good thing no one else was on the bus," Caleb said, falling into step beside Jimmy. "Completely flew by all the other stops this morning. Guess the city knows how to pick 'em, huh?"
"You should write for the newspaper. Caleb, the investigative reporter. Just don't be Fox news and make up stuff like crazy Egyptian curses and bill boards making people gay crazy."
"Egyptian curses?" Caleb said, getting that pinched, curious look to his face.
"Never mind. I had a weird dream. I'll tell you at lunch."
"Is it a good one?" Caleb asked, brightening. He suddenly looked so...cute to Jimmy. What with those pale green eyes, the strawberry blonde hair, Jimmy had to pause a second to consciously close his mouth and swallow before continuing.
But the bell rang, signalling the warning before classes begin, and the two boys knocked fists before heading in opposite directions to their first classes. Jimmy couldn't keep the image of Caleb's grinning, excited face from his mind, however. He was barely in time to his English Lit. class and spent much of the time forcing himself back to concentrating on his work.
"What a weird morning," he thought, absently staring out the window.
-NEXT!
It's not the wolf you see you should fear, but all the ones he howls with. Don't be afraid of the song, but don't piss off the choir.
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... and why is it that it's always in English Lit that I'm counting condoms with everyone giggling and staring at me ... and why is it only just this morning that I realized for the very first time that Caleb is red-headed. Hmmmm, I wonder if he's uncut. Lordy, now that would be hot ... mmmm so hot!
And, why is it that I don't know whether he's uncircumcised or not? Why haven't I asked Caleb, or better yet how is it that I've not ever seen him naked?
NEXT
Warren C. E. Austin
The Gay Deceiver
Toronto, Canada
"... comme recherché qu'un délice callipygian"
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DesDownunder
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Likes it here |
Location: Adelaide, South Australia
Registered: September 2010
Messages: 127
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The home bell rang and as I gathered up my books an idea suddenly popped into my head.I should invite him for a sleepover and then sneak a look at his nether regions when he was sleeping, or maybe when he is showering with the ripples of crystal clear water cascading down his naked body, pooling on the tiled floor before they swirl down the drain.
"What are you thinking?" Caleb asked me, snapping me back from a vision of the future I wanted.
"er, we will have to walk home," I announced.
"I know," Caleb said, "the bus is out of commission and it looks like rain. Come on, race you to the crash site," he said with a sparkle in his eye.
I realised this would be the perfect opportunity to ask him to sleepover, so
I ran after him across the oval, but he was already out of sight until I exited through the gate onto Woods Avenue which led to Canyon Road where the bus crashed.
I was startled to see Caleb squatting in the middle of the road, holding an amulet.
"Look what I found," he said as I ran up to him, "It has funny marks on it."
"They're not funny marks," I told him, "They're hieroglyphics."
We walked up Canyon Road until we were standing beneath the huge billboard with its ever-changing advertisements. Caleb stopped walking,
"Look," he said as he once again examined the amulet, "the other side is in English.
I looked closer as he turned the amulet over and we saw the English writing, but it made no sense.
Caleb began to sound the writing phonetically, and as he concentrated on his task, I looked at the Billboard, which changed as if in response to the sounds Caleb was making, I saw two ancient Egyptian columns appear with a doorway between them guarded by a man in one of those cute little skirts that ancient Egyptians used to wear. He looked like he had just woken up and he was not happy to see us. Bravely I stood behind Caleb and grabbed his arm, "Look," I told him as I pointed at the approaching muscly Egyptian.
"Oh 'ell," said Caleb, "Now we're in for it."
Next...
[Updated on: Sat, 14 May 2011 10:14]
DesDownunder
Call me naive if you want, but life without trust in the goodness of others would be intolerable.
Religious indoctrination: It gets better, without it.
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Jimmy and Caleb looked on in surprise as the "possibly Egyptian" moved towards them. Caleb muttered something and tried to back up, but Jimmy was firmly in place behind him, held still with the shock of it all.
"Caleb, what did you do?"
"Me?! How's this my fault?"
"You read the bloody thing!"
"Yeah well... awwe crap-nugggets."
The Egyptian moved closer, smiling. His eyes were caked in dark makeup that seemed to glitter slightly. On his head was a blue and white striped head dress, with a golden cobra wrapped around his forehead holding the whole thing in place. There was another cobra ornament wrapping the upper part of the boy's left arm. Other than that and the white skirt and laced sandals on his feet, he had a neck drape of some silky material, with jewels or glass beads of glittering color sewn into it.
Jimmy couldn't help but think the Egyptian boy looked familar, like maybe a kid in their class or someone he'd seen on the news. The way he walked spoke of confidence and grace, the sort that only training in sports or gymnastics imparts. Jimmy stepped slighly to the left of Caleb, as if suddenly needing a closer look at this specimen.
The Egyptian began speaking, but it was all gibberish to the two boys. Caleb traded a quick glance with Jimmy, but neither of them could make heads of tails of the quirky language the Egyptian boy spoke. He pointed to Caleb's hand, where the odd amulet still was clutched tightly, as if it might fly away at any moment.
"You think he wants the... the... whatever that is?" Jimmy asked, still looking at the Egyptian boy. He's only a few years older than us, Jimmy thought, a curious tilt coming to his head as he continued to watch the new comer.
"Idunno. You... want... this?" Caleb said with exaggerated slowness and loudness.
"Geeze, Caleb, he doesn't speak the English. He's not deaf."
"You got a better idea?" Caleb snapped back.
"Enoch! Tonichy deku saninjasct!"
"What do you think that means?"
"How do I know?" Caleb hissed back. "Maybe it's his way of saying he comes in peace?"
"That's what aliens say, not... ancient people."
"Maybe he thinks we're gods?"
Both boys and the Egyptian were startled by Jimmy's phone suddenly going off, the distinctive Lady Gaga ring tone and buzz shaking Jimmy's right thigh.
"Kebek na!" the Egyptian cried out in surprise. But before Jimmy could answer the phone in his pocket, the Egyptian reached out with both hands and gestured to the sky.
"Oh hell," Caleb muttered. Both boys felt a tingle gathering around them, the wind rising, dust suspending in the air taking curving lines and glistening and suddenly.....
It's not the wolf you see you should fear, but all the ones he howls with. Don't be afraid of the song, but don't piss off the choir.
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