A Place of Safety - RDF feed
type: channel
description: I expect simple behaviours here. Friendship, and love. Any advice should be from the perspective of the person asking, not the person giving! We have had to make new membership moderated to combat the huge number of spammers who register
items: Distressing
items: Re: Distressing
items: Just how MANY parents do this to their kids?
items: Re: Just how MANY parents do this to their kids?
items: There is also hope:

Distressing
type: item
description: This is taken from http://www.dailykos.com/story/2005/6/10/20406/0177 Camp Hetero Horror by TerranceDC Fri Jun 10th, 2005 at 17:40:06 PDT This is what I get for adding yet another feed to my already long list of feeds to keep up with. This time it was LinkFilter that brought me a story so scary and depressing that I literally just sat and stared at the computer for about ten minutes. I've seen the movie But I'm a Cheerleader, but I guess I've been blocking out of my mind the reality that there are camps out there that allegedly make gay kids "straight," and that parents send their kids to these places. Specifically, Zack's parents are sending him. Apparently, when you're a 16-year-old gay boy in Bartlett, TN, bad things can happen. Diaries :: TerranceDC's diary :: :: Trackback :: Well today, my mother, father, and I had a very long "talk" in my room where they let me know I am to apply for a fundamentalist christian program for gays. They tell me that there is something psychologically wrong with me, and they "raised me wrong." I'm a big screw up to them, who isn't on the path God wants me to be on. So I'm sitting here in tears, joing the rest of those kids who complain about their parents on blogs - and I can't help it. I wish I had never told them. I wish I just fought the urge two more years... I had done it for three before then, right? If I could take it all back.. I would, to where I never told my parents things and they always were mad at me-- It's better than them crying and depressed cause they will have no granchildren from me. It's better than them telling me that there's something wrong with me. It's better than them explaining to me that they "raised me wrong." Here's more than you'd ever want to know about the rules of this place. I warn you, it's...well...scary. And here's what it does to a kid to even think of being sent to one of these places. I haven't been on a computer, phone, nor have I seen any friends in a week almost-- Soon. Soon, this will b…
creator: timmy
date: 2005-06-13T13:09:07-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: http://www.mikeditto.com/archives/kudos_to_queer_action_coalition This has more Kudos to Queer Action Coalition Via Ex-Gay Watch: A Tennessee-based religious organization euphemistically called “Love in Action” is running a brainwashing camp for gay kids. Among the camp’s practices, posted on the blog of a youth whose parents are forcing him to attend: * Kids in the program are not allowed to speak to anyone, not even their parents, for at least the first two days. * Kids are not allowed to go anywhere unless they are accompanied by at least two other participants, one of which has to have at least 8 weeks of prior indoctrination. * Kids are not allowed to keep a journal or a diary * Kids are not allowed to discuss what goes on in the program with anyone, not even their parents * Kids are not allowed to have contact with any family members other than parents, who also go through the program * Kids are not allowed to have any physical contact with any human being other than a hand shake or a pat on the shoulder, and only when authorized. * Kids are not allowed outside of a small geographic area within Memphis, even if accompanied by parents, without prior written authorization * Kids are not allowed to listen to any music that is not explicitly Christian (Bach and Beethoven are specifically forbidden as being non-Christian) * Kids are not permitted to enter restaurants that serve alcohol * Kids are not allowed to speak after 9:00 p.m. under any circumstance * Kids may be placed in a state of isolation where they are not allowed to communicate with one another Ex-gay programs, however misguided, are fine for consenting adults who for whatever reason think they want to change their sexual orientation (despite zero proof that it is even possible). This program is administered to minors against their will. It is forced indoctrination, including dehumanizing, degrading treatment. I really hope some civil liberties types will get clued into this and put a stop to it. In th…
creator: timmy
date: 2005-06-13T13:11:38-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: And more from http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=7428306&blogID=28610354&Mytoken=20050610204542 Monday, May 30, 2005 After The World Stopped, It Gave Me A Lot Of Rules. Current mood: worried Yeah, I was upset yesterday.. however I found an email about the rules and regulations of the program. My parents lied to me.. they told me (29th of May) that they didn't know what the rules were exactly, however, this email wasnt sent on the 26th of May. I see now why they "didn't know what the rules were." It's horrible.. they're posted below.. and I so worried. It's like boot camp... but worse. I obviously was not supposed to see this.. Seeing the bottom say "Parental Rules (not to be given to client)" What is with these people...? Honestly.. how could you support a program like this? If I do come out straight I'll be so mentally unstable and depressed it wont matter.. I'll be back in therapy again. This is not good-- Refuge Program Rules Exceptions to program rules will be granted by C.O.C. (Chain of Command) only. Sobriety One of the core functions of the Refuge is the common pursuit of corporate sobriety from sin. The program strives to perpetuate a safe environment that is ripe for growth and for hearing from God. The sobriety of each individual is a key focus. Galatians 5:19 - 21: 19 Now the works of the flesh are obvious, which are: adultery, sexual immorality, uncleanness, lustfulness, 20 idolatry, sorcery, hatred, strife, jealousies, outbursts of anger, rivalries, divisions, heresies, 21 envying, murders, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these; of which I forewarn you, even as I also forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. 1 Corinthians 6:12-15: 12 "All things are lawful for me," but not all things are expedient. "All things are lawful for me," but I will not be brought under the power of anything. 13 "Foods for the belly, and the belly for foods," but God will bring to nothing both it a…
creator: timmy
date: 2005-06-13T13:14:22-00:00

Just how MANY parents do this to their kids?
type: item
description: I can post these. I can NOT read them. I am dying inside for these poor kids. I am more than distressed.
creator: timmy
date: 2005-06-13T13:18:59-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: This has been going on for a long long time...... It will not change... As long as there are religions that proclaim "ours is the only way" and political regimes that fester hate there will be the concentration camps. It will not change.... There is nothing I can do... Nothing you can do... It will not change....
creator: marc
date: 2005-06-13T13:25:18-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: Oh..... and one more thing.... Don't look only to the USA for these places..... They exist wherever religion has a death grip on free thinking people.
creator: marc
date: 2005-06-13T13:27:03-00:00

Re: Just how MANY parents do this to their kids?
type: item
description: Sometimes it's hard to put into words the thoughts I have, and this is really one of those times. I just can't understand how parents could do this to a child that they claim to love. How can people get so worried about something as insignificant as sexual orientation (yes, this is a rhetorical question). Surely this sort of indocrtrination breaches various conventions to which the US has agreed? It really shows that children can be third class citizens :-[ As to banning Bach as non-religious - doesn't anyone realize that a large amount of his works were for church use (of course these are Lutheran churches we're talking about).
creator: cchd
date: 2005-06-13T14:29:05-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: Jesus Christ...! (and I actually think it appropriate to blaspheme here - if Jesus exists, what can he think of people doing such terrible things in his name?) This is ten times worse than what happened to me. Imagine being there and knowing that even when you get out your parents will always look at you with suspicion, that you are an outcast, that they would rather you commit suicide than just be yourself. How the American government can think they have a right to behave the way they do to the rest of the world when they approve such fundamental violations of human rights is beyond me. Land of the free? I have never heard anything so ironic. I, like Timmy, am shocked and distressed.
creator: Deeej
date: 2005-06-13T15:08:05-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: Timmy'll know what I mean by "what happened to me". It's not quite the same thing but similar in quite a few ways. Perhaps I'll post about it when I am feeling strong.
creator: Deeej
date: 2005-06-13T15:09:27-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: Be shocked Be distressed But dont think it doesnt happen there as well
creator: marc
date: 2005-06-13T15:34:02-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: Sorry -- don't think it doesn't happen where?
creator: Deeej
date: 2005-06-13T15:35:46-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: You mean things like this happen in more brutal third-world regimes? Yes, I know they do, and it is terrible. But that doesn't stop it being extremely hypocritical of the US to criticise religious extremism and violation of human rights with things like this going on on its very doorstep. Thank goodness for the liberality of Western Europe. I used to think there were so many wonderful places to be in the world, but now I can't really think of anywhere else I'd rather live.
creator: Deeej
date: 2005-06-13T15:43:14-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: In its way it was similar enough. Only post about it when and if YOU want to.
creator: timmy
date: 2005-06-13T15:44:42-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: We do not live in a clean nation ourselves. I have not researched them, but I am equally sure that simialr organisations ply their vicious trade here, too. An adult may do as he or she sees fit. But a child? It was not many years ago that repulsive institutiinal treatment was given out in this country as the norm. We are "better" than the USA because we are not a nation bound in chains by religion as they are. But we are not clean. Equally do not think that no UK kids get sent to the US Camps. We have a very long fight to get the bigots to believe that we are normal.
creator: timmy
date: 2005-06-13T15:48:43-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: I think I must be the exception - and very lucky - never to have encountered homophobia in the UK. So when I read about it in other countries I tend to think "thank God it doesn't happen here". But of course it does. And did. I just haven't seen it. The thing that is happening in America, though, is that is becoming steadily *less* liberal. Whereas here we still have as many liberties as we ever have done. (Well, in most fields, anyway... though there is a lot of public hysteria that never used to exist... and unfortunately some American laws are filtering over here -- patents and copyright and things like that.) David
creator: Deeej
date: 2005-06-13T16:30:30-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: Hmm... If they do exist, then I will gladly make a huge fuss and write to The Times and my MP about it. But I am sure if they did we'd have heard about it from one of the gay rights groups? Surely?
creator: Deeej
date: 2005-06-13T16:32:44-00:00

Re: Distressing
type: item
description: in your country or any other for that matter
creator: marc
date: 2005-06-13T16:35:51-00:00

There is also hope:
type: item
description: http://content.gay.com/channels/news/heads/010129_courage_exodus.html U.K. ex-gay leader claims conversion therapy futile by Barbara Dozetos Gay.com Network Jeremy Marks More news: • Faith-based order by Bush alarms activists • Boy Scouts boot pro-gay troops • Action Center • News Channel In boards: • Religion and homosexuality The leader of a reparative therapy ministry in the United Kingdom has come to the conclusion that the process doesn't work. Jeremy Marks, director of Courage, United Kingdom, reached an agreement with parent organization Exodus International giving Courage "sabbatical leave" for at least two years, according to the Exodus site. The break from Exodus--an ex-gay Christian organization--will give Courage the chance "to explore its new direction and practice." That direction, according to Marks, is away from the fundamental goal upon which Exodus is based: freedom from homosexuality. "We are definitely wanting to be separated from the 'ex-gay' label and be more focused on supporting Christians who are gay," Marks said. Marks' personal experiences as a gay man, as well as a minister who has participated in conversion therapy for more than 14 years, led him gradually to the realization that the process simply does not work. "None of the people we've counseled have converted no matter how much effort and prayer they've put into it. There is much more benefit to the more honest view," he said. The underlying assumption that being gay is an anathema to being Christian is damaging to most people, he said. "They end up fighting themselves in an internal war." Marks said his wife of nine years is cautiously accepting of the change in his ministry. In spite of his change of heart about homosexuality, he said he has no intentions of pursuing a gay relationship. "This is because I believe in keeping the vows I made before God, and my wife deserves to be loved, not deserted," said Marks. "Having said that, in truth my orientation has not changed." He said cl…
creator: timmy
date: 2005-06-13T19:47:05-00:00