Kitzyma wrote on Sat, 12 October 2013 11:33Okay, this may seem stupid, and sorry if I'm over-thinking (as I often do) but I'm not sure exactly what you mean by boyfriend.
Does a boyfriend have to be someone you had sex with?
Is it someone who was a friend and with whom you had sex a few times?
Is it someone you cared for and who cared about you and there was lots of sex?
Is it someone you cared for and who cared about you and there was mutual attraction but without sex?
Is it someone you fell in love with and who fell in love with you and you saw each other often but there was no sexual contact?
Is it someone you were madly in love with and who felt the same about you and that involved passionate sex.
Actually, I've even encountered people who say they have an online boyfriend whom they've never (or only very rarely) met in person. However, I'm a bit dubious about that use of the word 'boyfriend'. Would you include it for the purpose of this poll?
I guess i'm not as unusual as i thought - i was way under 12 when i loved a boy.
I guess i'm not as unusual as i thought - i was way under 12 when i loved a boy.
Kitzyma wrote on Wed, 16 October 2013 12:20
"kiwi wrote on Wed, 16 October 2013 00:12"I guess i'm not as unusual as i thought - i was way under 12 when i loved a boy.
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I guess like all other words, 'boyfriend' depends on what different people mean by it.
For me, just loving another boy doesn't mean that he was my boyfriend even if we were very good friends. I've loved lots of guys, some of whom hardly even acknowledged that I existed and they certainly didn't feel the same about me. I've been in love with some guys who made it clear they just wanted to be friends. None of those could by my use of the word be described as boyfriends.
As I use the word, there have to be three components:
1) the emotion isn't just the sort of 'ordinary' friendship I have with other guys;
2) there has to be some sexual attraction, though there doesn't have to be any sexual contact;
3) the other guy must have similar feelings toward me.