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I think people where just worried about you because they care and wanted to make sure you where safe.
Like Timmy said, it appears as though things got out of hand.
David
It's always the old to lead us to the war
It's always the young to fall
Now look at all we've won with the sabre and the gun
Tell me is it worth it all
~Phil Ochs "I Aint Marching Anymore"
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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I figured as much....
I'm used to it....
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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Jinjay-kun, My tongue dances behind my lips wrote:
> i think i just found someone and actually lives close he said he was looking for some one like me and hed love to talk if i wanted to...oh and hes got a freakin gorgeos body and hes a bit older ;-D
I hope that things work out for both of you! Age differences can be either totally trivial (the longest relationship of my life started when he was 18 and I was 36), or devastating (yup - I had an abusive one of those when I was 13/14 with a guy only a few years older than me). Plenty of people here to bounce ideas off if you have any doubts or concerns about the way things develop.
"The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral, begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy. ... Returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night devoid of stars." Martin Luther King
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I dont know if theings are the same everywhere, but around here a pedaphyle is someone who desires sex ir us attracted to children under the age of majority. A chicken hawk is an older man who is attracted or has sex with a younger man still in his early 20s. Deeej is correct. Another thing here they have to be more than 4 years apart in age. I think this is to not jump the gun when 8 year old Bobby is caught playing doctor with 6 year old Susan.
If you stand for Freedom, but you wont stand for war, then you dont stand for anything worth fighting for.
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You are very right in what you said. However, there are younger men or boys who have a prefference for older men, but they are few and far between. I never understood why older men wanted to have sex with a teen or younger man. The older men should be there as mentors to the younger ones and help them not make the mistakes we made. This is the only place I have ever seen this happen. I admire Timmy more than he knows.
If you stand for Freedom, but you wont stand for war, then you dont stand for anything worth fighting for.
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Please dont be sorry. Jinjay=kun, do what your heart tells you is right, make him your friend and whatever develops from that fine. You have a right to have a friend to talk to and discuss things with. He sounds mature and in control; of himself. You will know whats wrong and whats right. Best of luck and have fun with your new friend.
If you stand for Freedom, but you wont stand for war, then you dont stand for anything worth fighting for.
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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I accept your admiration with a mixture of pleasure and perplexity. The concept of mentoring those in need, younger or older, is natural to me. I wonder,sometimes, why this seems not to be the case with everyone.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Well, as a pedant, I object to people calling someone who is attracted to people under the age of majority a 'paedophile'. That would be such a wide-ranging definition as to be useless. It's not the clinical definition and it would cover (say) a 21 year-old who is attracted to a 16 year-old. 16 is under the age of majority but over the age of consent in the UK, which means that such an attraction is societally acceptable (provided it is non-exploitative). What is more, in any country, I don't believe that there are many young straight men who would not be attracted to a well-developed 16 year-old girl. That does not make them paedophiles, and never has.
In the UK, 'paedophile' is just about the most offensive term in existence and it annoys me that people sling it around without thought for whether they are even using it correctly. Clinically, it applies to men or women who are primarily attracted to children under the age of puberty. Unless puberty comes along on the 18th birthday in America, you are using an incorrect definition -- even if it's common over there, it's definitely not right.
(By the way, it's paedophile (UK) or pedophile (US). There has never been a 'y' in it. It's a transliteration of ancient Greek and ancient Greek has no 'y'.)
David
[Updated on: Sun, 09 September 2007 11:26] |
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I agree that this is a great site, and it can be a place for younger guys to meet interesting mentor-type older guys. I've received letters from a few older guys here, and of the five guys only two panned out as true mentors. The other three followed a typical pattern. They are really interested at first in everything I'm doing, they encourage, they are like a cheering section. Then after about the fourth letter came the hints of getting to know me better, and "do you have any pictures?" They found out I wrestle, and it's "oh, by the way, do you have any pictures of yourself in your singlet?" They find out your friends hang around the pool in your yard, and it's "oh, do you have any pictures of you and your friends at the pool?" Like I'm stupid, and don't know the real reason for all this. I made that mistake of sending pictures of myself one time, and after seeing my pictures and my bud's pictures on a gay-oriented teen site I yanked all my personal pictures off myspace, and anywhere else like flickr and facebook and the rest. I wrote to the asshole who probably posted them, and never heard back, and then his mailbox disappeared.
I feel kind of sorry for dudes like that. No lives of their own so they have to live through the lives of all the twinks they "mentor" on these places. Maybe the things they teach us in school about Internet safety, and stalking, and grooming have all we younger guys spooked, and overly suspicious.
It's first period, and I'm supposed to be writing this week's essay, but I did that last night. Don't tell on me. We're only supposed to be on wireless in the Media Center.
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Im sorry that some of the people here have made asses of themselves, but Im pretty sure that it wasnt the regular posters on the board. There are others who just hange around reading the board waitting for an oportunity. Unfortunately Timmy cant filter out these preditors, so you should always be watchful and careful.
If you stand for Freedom, but you wont stand for war, then you dont stand for anything worth fighting for.
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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Like all sites where people "meet", there will be people whose interest is more than mentoring, or more than friendship. Provided everyone is aware that this is likely to be the case then it is sort of "ok" in a way.
We can't protect people from themselves, nor from predators. We can't stop people sending pictures, or those receiving them from exploiting them. All we can do is to deal with what goes on in public, and recognise that email and chat and chat rooms may show different aspects.
I'm not keen unless I really get to know someone, on receiving or sending pictures.
I don't mind "getting to know people better", but not, certainly for ages, in anything to do with location, real name (if ever) etc.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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By the way I am always cautious about avatar pictures. I expect peole here to be aware when they upload one that it is a public image. So, if they use their own face, that's ok. I don't use my own face, though.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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jack
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Likes it here |
Location: England
Registered: September 2006
Messages: 304
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i dont agree it was the regulars. but let it rest.
life is to enjoy.
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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It doesn't really matter if it was a regular or not. To an extent it should rest, to an extent it does need to be highlighted. I'm not saying this to be provocative in any way. Instead I'm saying it to be protective.
That someone is young does not mean they are vulnerable, it simply means they are inexperienced compared to an older person (0.9 probability). It never does any harm to remind everyone here that the world is not only full of pleasant people, but also of unpleasant people. We're lucky. We meet more pleasant than unpleasant.
But a forum such as this is an attractive "spot" for those who predate and groom young people, and we should all be aware of that.
To make it a non issue all we all have to do is to be worldly wise about what we reveal to others.
I'm sure I'd love to see wrestling or pool pictures if the young gentlemen are attractive, but soliciting them is different from being sent them in true friendship (and I am not asking in any way to see them, as I am sure everyone realises). Asking for "A picture you are comfortable with sending" is substantially better than asking for "A picture of you, scantily clad", but "never asking" is far better. Equally, expecting "a picture for a picture" is asking. If you want to send on to anyone, do it after thought, but never feel any pressure to send one, and if pressure happens, drop them like a hot brick.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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Benji wrote:
> Is Michael Jackson gay? I don't think so, but he definitely desires children
You know, there are two reasons why you can't say that.- Unless you have personal, provable knowledge of this, then you cannot say it, because it is speculation, not fact.
- A court of law has proven him not to be guilty of the matters he was charged with, therefore he is innocent
Now he may or may not desire children. This may or may not be sexual. All we know for certain about the man is that he had a troubled childhood, and that he appears to be a troubled adult.
He is the type of person who would be welcome here to discuss his troubles and concerns and to have us attempt, each in our own way, to help him.
In short, he was a physically abused child, and thus probably needs far better help than those clustering around him can ever give.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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Well, as far as Wakko Jakko is concerned, all one needs is eyes. Every time he is seen in publick he has a gaggle of boys with him.
If that is not a desire to be with children i dont know what is.
Sex with them? Well of course thare are the money grubbing low life that will try to extort $$$$ from someone as rich as him. But I dont think all of them did..... that would be just too easy.
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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Benji
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Likes it here |
Location: USA
Registered: August 2007
Messages: 297
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As for MJ, true he was not convicted, also true he'd earlier (10 years?) paid out a large settlement to a 13 year old boy with terms that prevent him from disclosing any information. Sorry but he seems very preoccupied with little boys, sleeps with them..yada yada yada!!
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Benji
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Likes it here |
Location: USA
Registered: August 2007
Messages: 297
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That's pretty funny LOL, No, I've been married 25 years raised two kids and I am definitely not looking to hook up with a teen/college age kid!! Sorry, it just ain't gonna happen. Youngest I've been with, he was 18 & I was 19 and it happened overseas in 'nam. I had many encounters, age difference was always the same. I settled down at age 30, never strayed, never will!
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Re: I think i found someone! 
