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tim
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Really getting into it |
Location: UK, West of London in Ber...
Registered: February 2002
Messages: 842
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A friend of mine is in an influential position in a country not totally known for Gay tolerance in its religion. He is striving very hard in a professional capacity to bring tolerance to the fore. It is likely to take his lifetime and several more to achieve this.
Today he asked me if I would create two polls on gay sexual matters, so I have.
One poll of for those of us who are sexually active with other males. The other is for those who are not yet active, or may never be active. Please choose the one that applies to you and answer fully and honestly. I am not collecting, cannot collect, and do not ever wish to collect the identities of those who asnswer the polls.
If you wish to make comments, please place those comments within the polls. There is a place to do that. I mention this becaise I am placing this message AND the polls on messageboards, and answers on message boards will not help him in his work. Answers within the polls will.
Please choose which of these two polls you should (and will) answer, and then answer only that oneThe answers are to help in a piece of research which is planned to help the gay community in a gay "oppressive" area
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tim
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Really getting into it |
Location: UK, West of London in Ber...
Registered: February 2002
Messages: 842
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Two messagebaords where I placed thsi poll have deleted it stating that it is "unsuitable". One is a messagebaord where gay teenage stories are discussed and the other is apparently a gay rights messageboard.
Neither of those moderators took the trouble to ask what the poll was for, and both simply removed it. Each used an exciuse of being a "PG13" board. An interesting excuse, and one that does not wash.
Neither moderator has taken the trouble to email me about it subsequently. Interesting. We are too small a community to be unpleasant to each other, and yet we manage.
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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for the following reasons:
1. a lot ppl got the info about that poll in your newsletter, with a link where to find it
2. using numerous boards to post the poll will alter the results, coz (only one example) everyone visiting a few different boards where it's posted might take part in it a few times
3. it only contained inappropriate questions, i don't think anyone has to know what me and my boyfriend are doing or not doing in our bedroom
4. if it really should help someone to improve gay issues, you should at least ensure, that one person can vote only once, else ... see 2.
As an adult you should just accept that someone doesn't have the same oppinion about things like you, and try to understand and accept his reactions. Now you can flame me or whatever, but i stand to my opinion, that it was right to delete it.
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Steve
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Really getting into it |
Location: London, England
Registered: November 2006
Messages: 465
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Dear Someone,
I read your reposte to Tim first with amusement and then with not little anger. I find all your "reasons" spurious.
>>1. a lot ppl got the info about that poll in your newsletter, with a link where to find it<<
So? By that reasoning the more places Tim published it the more people would know where to find it.
>>2. using numerous boards to post the poll will alter the results, coz (only one example) everyone visiting a few different boards where it's posted might take part in it a few times<<
Rubbish - as you would have discovered had you tried to vote twice. After reading your message I did: I voted once on Tim's site and once here (above). The second time the program told me that I had already voted and that my second vote would not be counted.
>>3. it only contained inappropriate questions, i don't think anyone has to know what me and my boyfriend are doing or not doing in our bedroom<<
So, you could choose not to answer those questions that offend you, or to ignore the whole thing completely. Whether or not the questions were inappropriate would depend on their purpose - which, Tim says, the owner of the board did not bother to learn about.
>>4. if it really should help someone to improve gay issues, you should at least ensure, that one person can vote only once, else ... see 2.<<
See my response above. Two can play at that game.
>>As an adult you should just accept that someone doesn't have the same oppinion about things like you,<<
Hmm. Aren't other people's opinions exactly what Tim was trying to learn? What strange reasons you have given.
I have provided you with my name and addy - which is more than you did for me! Are you ashamed of yourself or something?
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tim
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Really getting into it |
Location: UK, West of London in Ber...
Registered: February 2002
Messages: 842
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Perhpas, if you are expecting a reply that is not pleasant, you should leave your email address, and a recognisable name. Though why you feel you should get flamed is beyond me. Nonetheless it does seem unusual that you criticise and do not provide a quiet and private mechanism in addition to a public mechanism for a response.
Before replying to you I read Steve's response. There is nothing to add to it. I cannot collect and am not interested in collecting data about who responds. What you do in your bedroom with as many men as you choose or with your right hand is, indeed, private. The only way it would not be private is if you told me explicitly your answers, for thsi is a poll, a statistical device, that collects aggregate answers, not individual ones.
That the questions are clinical does not make them inappropriate. It makes them unambiguous, and thus capaable, if you choose, of being answered. Perhaops they have made you aware of your sexuality in a dofferent light, but that is a matter between you and whoever you share your body with, not a question for me to know the answer to.
These polls are imperfect to the extent that a perosn with technical knowledge can circumvent the security. There is a person right now who is gloating about having done that. Howver, the sending them to multiple locations and mu multiple emails, and to an email based audience far wider than you realise which wil have included duplications does not mean that people can automatically vote twice or more times.
Even if a person achieves the somewhat weird personal goal of placimg multiple votes, the sample size grows to make their attempt at skewing the poll an irrelevance.
There are some who have said that for a poll to be vaid the purpose must be declared in advance. This is quite the reverse, since the declaration of purpose can and opften does influence the answers given.
There are others who have said that the polls are not valid unless compiled by a statistician. Again not so. It is thye interpretationn of the results and removal of skew that requires a statistician.
The person who has sponsored this poll is using it to justify an argument for tolerance of the homosexual community in a place in the world he has asked me not to specify, inside a religious framework he has asked me not to specify. Despite loud words to the cntrary from those who seem to prefer shouting to listening, the questions have provided him so far with the trends he needs in order to justify his arguments for tolerance and acceptance.
Like all such work behind the scenes, we will never see the results in perosn, nor meet the sponsor nor his work in person. We may not even expereince the results of his work in our lifetimes. Even so, please do not allow back biting to remove valid answers to these two polls. And please do understand that they are not the only mechanism he is using to collect data, and that such polls are not just "limited" to sites that I own, control or post on.
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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The administrator of my board, Sergio, sent an E-mail to Tim and I also posted on the board when I read it. I hope all misunderstandings have been cleared up
First of all, Tim's post was not deleted. The post remained but the poll was replaced with a link to the author's e-mail.
As the owner of Crzy House I decide what is appropriate for my own message board. I have never discussed sexual preferences in either personal e-mail or on AIM OR ICQ and I dont host sexual discussions or polls on my board. Period.
I have always considered Tim a friend and still do, of course. I have a great deal of respect for Tim, his intelligence and his opinions and even when we may have disagreed about something, we have always remained friends and I trust that will continue for as long as we know each other.
I'm very sorry that Tim was angered by having the poll replaced with a link on Crzy House. No insult was ever intended by anyone at Crzy House towards Tim or the person who asked for the poll, just as I assume Tim and the person who needed the information did not intend to insult or offend me or the people on my board, by posting sexually explicit questions. They were simply looking for information and we were simply removing explicitly sexual content but leaving a link to the poll
I have nothing but the upmost respect and admiration for the person who asked Tim to make up a poll. He's been a wonderful friend to me and still is. I love him to death and respect him very much.
And although he has patiently tried to explain the purpose, I still dont understand how explicit personal information could possibly influence a government to be more accepting of gays. And such things as fisting and rimming are totally beyond the realm of a government discussion on gay rights, I would assume. I could be wrong.
Regardless of my failure to see the purpose of this poll, I trust both men enough that the link to the poll will remain on Crzyhouse. And that will have to sufice. My board has kids who post and lurk who are of all ages, sex, sexual preference, and life experience. Everyone knows my views on protecting kids. Its no secret.
Sergio and I both had complaints that the post was offensive. I myself found it offensive because I'm a very private person. Thats just my own personal reaction and is not meant as an insult to either Tim or the person who needs the information.
I hope there are no hard feelings. I am not in the least upset with anyone. I never was. I didnt even know about it until 1 a.m. Sunday night (Monday morning) because I was at my b/f's house and didnt check the board.
Sergio also has no animosity towards anyone connected to this poll. In fact, he never for a minute, thought that by replacing it with a link, he would make anyone angry. He was merely doing his job to protect the integrity of my message board. I completely agree with and support his decision. My board is a reflection of me, my morals,and my passion for civil rights, gay rights, music, etc with a liberal dose of humor thrown in the mix. Nowhere, is there any sexual content of an explicit nature.
Anyone who follows my message board knows that we have about a 50/50 male/female group and about the same adult/teen-kid ratio (at least judging from my mail.) You will never find explicit sexual content there. That's not the purpose of Crzy House.
To avoid any misunderstandings in the future, if you have something to post on Crzy House of a sexual nature, please take the time to E-mail me or Sergio first. It will avoid this problem before it occurs.
At Crzy House the board has moved on. I'm very sorry that everything kind of exploded on the Shack. I hope it settles down and gets back to normal soon without permanent damage. Its a shame that people (including Tim, Wolfie, and Comsie) have been hurt because of an intent to do something good such as improve gay rights. It just shows that everyone has to think very carefully and consider everyone else. I know its impossible to please everyone all the time, but we can all try a little harder.
There's too much anger and not enough humor. Treat your friends kindly. HUGS TO TIM and to my other very special anonymous friend. I love you both. I respect you both. I apologize to you both for unintentionally pissing you off. And I hope you mend fences with everyone else as well over this.
It was sooo not necessary to have fights over this.
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tim
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Really getting into it |
Location: UK, West of London in Ber...
Registered: February 2002
Messages: 842
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Sergio and I had a converstaion on AIM. While we cannot be expected to agree on everything we reached agreement on some very simple matters leading to a good understanding. I had hoped to see you, too, Lance on AIM to have the same quiet conversation with you, though I asked Sergio to save our chat and show it to you at his discretion. There is no loss of friendship. I simply misunderstood the nature of your board. I did suggest to Sergio a different way of handling such misunderstadnings in the future.
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