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Steve
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Really getting into it |
Location: London, England
Registered: November 2006
Messages: 465
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Psychologists recognize four basic origins of sexual impetus: genital, oral, anal and visual. (I accept that as being axiomatic and do not contest it.)
My question is directed towards those participants on this board who, like myself, are by choice or circumstance homosexually celibate - either because we are married or because we are too young, too old, too lazy, or whatever.
We all have homosexual erotic impulses. My question is which of the four basic origins mentioned above is uppermost in your erotic experiences. To put it more bluntly: what gives you the most erotic stimulation? - anticipation of or imagining genital contact, oral contact, anal contact or visual - i.e. just looking at and imagining naked young men and not necessarily what you would do with them.
Please participate in this discussion as I believe that it could be helpful to several of us on this board. (I have Tim's permission to raise this issue.) I shall certainly contribute if a discussion ensues, but I don't want to give my own 'take' at the start for fear of influencing the direction of the discussion.
Over to you.
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I suppose anticipation of possible contact is probably the greatest but for me I thought it was pictures but no more. Now i find the written word comes a very close second.
Mike
Friendship is the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts or measure words
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tim
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Really getting into it |
Location: UK, West of London in Ber...
Registered: February 2002
Messages: 842
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But the timing differs
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smith
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On fire! |
Registered: January 1970
Messages: 1095
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I'm the young end of the ladder here for this
question.
I've read the stories, looked at the pictures
and there's gotta be more to it than that...for me.
I guess I would just like simple tactile contact.
Dang! I'd love someone to just hold my hand.
~smith
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trevor
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Really getting into it |
Registered: November 2002
Messages: 732
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I'm glad for that, smith. And I still say snuggling is highly underrated - sometimes I just fantasize about that - fully trusting someone enough to NOT actually have to be sexual, but to be close and sensual and comforted.
I guess the topic was "erotic", and I guess that's not exactly what I'm referring to, though.
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Tactile contact. Yeah, I'd go for that too.
Original post listed four "zones" so to speak. I read them and was like, "umm, okay. Where's the rest of the body then?"
About holding hands... Most people probably thinks it isn't that much to write home about. In reality, it's actually quite divine.
I've had my hand held once by a guy that wasn't even good-looking, and it was fantastic. 
"But he that hath the steerage of my course,
direct my sail."
-William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, Act One, Scene IV
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tim
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Really getting into it |
Location: UK, West of London in Ber...
Registered: February 2002
Messages: 842
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I am attracted by initial sight. Always initial facial, well unless what I "see" is online, when it is what is inside that counts.
I do then think genital. I know what I want, and how I want it. But the perosnality comes into it.
Let's take a sterile example: "Meet Joe Black" had Brad Pitt in it playing a role I found rivetting. Brad, per se, is not gorgeous. He also has a skin complaint as far as I can see. But in that film his face, hair, and demeanour were "perfect". The character was enigmatic. And put simply I wanted him so badly I became moist!
He could have taken me and done anything at all to me form that screen persona. In other films, with the notable exception of "the Devil's Own" (I am a sucker for long blond mullets) he is not even worth a second glance.
So it is looks, then "being". But the rest in quick succession
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tim
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Really getting into it |
Location: UK, West of London in Ber...
Registered: February 2002
Messages: 842
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I'm good at holding hands, I think
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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Dear Steve;
I guess for me I remember very vividly the times I had when I was in my teens and the two b/fs (back in the early 60s one did not call them b/fs). As I reached my early 20s for family reasons and my job (teacher in a boys school) I had to lock those feelings a way totally. I then went along with what was expected and got married and had 2 sons (you know this already - so this really is not new). These feelings have come to the bubbled to the surface again and I long for those feelings again! The fantastic feeling one experiences with the physical contact (oral, genital and visual - have not experienced anal - would love to) the gorgeous look of the naked male body - those are my erotic stimulation to the point where I can almost feel them happening, I can honestly say that those feelings exist very strongly at times and are a real turn on for me at times.
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warren c. e. austin
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Likes it here |
Location: Toronto, Ontario, CANADA
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 247
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Don't ever discount environment either.
I simply a sucker for roaring fireplaces and bear-skin rugs; for starry moonlit autumn nights; walking in the rain (holding hands or arm around the shoulder in a gentle hugging embrace) skipping through puddles; barefoot traversing low breakers on a wind-swept beach in the early dawn.
I could go on, but you get the idea.
No-where in this equation does a persons looks ever enter in to it, nor does any lacivious or licentious contact; just companionship, pure and simple. Shared trust, warmth of affection, and many lengthly unspoken moments of truth.
Warren C. E. Austin
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e
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On fire! |
Location: currently So Cal
Registered: May 2002
Messages: 1179
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That seems to be a rather Freudian way of looking at it, but Siggy wasn't all bad. 
I'm definitely not anal. The thought of anal sex (on either end) just doesn't arouse me. That doesn't mean I wouldn't give it a try under the right circumstances.
Sexual arousal, for me anyway, is a progression. For me it begins visually. This does not mean my partner (man or woman) has to be good-looking, but somehow I do need to see them as sexually appealing, at least to me. Looks actually matter less the more I know a person.
From there it would progress into either or both oral or genital contact. Though it would not actually have to be more than a kiss or holding hands. These activities would fall into those categories.
Think good thoughts,
e
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mt
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Toe is in the water |
Registered: November 2002
Messages: 93
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Steve darling!! What a charming topic!!
Well… here goes:
For me it’s simply all of them and any of them in any order. I’ve experienced all and I think they have the same degree of eroticism. It’s not the same all the time of course but any of them can move forward and be the first.
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