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Well, it's been quite a week on my road to bonding with Conor (that's his name, by the way) 
By the way, I say the week's over, cause there's no school tomorrow...woo woo!
Anyway, let's start on Monday. Monday, Conor and I talked a *lot*...and the conversation was about 30 minutes long. Most interesting was when he mentioned he had a desire to learn a musical instrument...hmm...I play clarinet...ding!
I told him I would teach him, and he sounded real excited. But, that seemed to chance, 'cause by Tuesday, he said he probably wouldn't want to. I mentioned I just happened to have the clarinet with me (hey, I'm getting good at this  ), and so I let him play a little. Naturally, being a first-time player, he squeaked, but by the end was able to make a correct sound. Yet, he said he *probably* wouldn't want to (and kept on bringing it up by saying *if* and *probably*, so we haven't ruled it out yet).
Then, from the advice of Timmy and some other great posters here, I attempted to ask him over. I was going to say to him that he really did a good job considering the circumstances (I mean, he was on a bus for crying out loud) and made considerable progress, since he could actually make the right sound. But, before I could ask him, he said he was going to Boston for the weekend, so we'll have to push it back a bit. (Probably better that it worked this way, since I was afraid I was pushing too far as it was anyway)
What did our conversation consist of? Well, turns out he has a lot more teachers that I had than I originally thought. So, a lot of our discussions centered around those teachers, and so I've made the step of talking to him and so far, we seem to be getting along.
So, in the future, I'll try to mention that he did pretty well with the clarinet for the all of 2 minutes he used it, and maybe if I tell him he did well, he'll have an interest in it (a little flattery doesn't hurt, either ). If these lessons progress, I'll start talking to him about doing stuff after lessons, like going to a movie or something like that, and then work my way from there...
But, so far, I think I've established a good base, and I'll try to build upon that base to continue on.
Now, last but certainly not least, I wanna give a BIG BIG HUG to ALL of you! Your warmth here has made me truly welcome, and I truly feel loved and cared for here. Without your advice, I probably would still be embarrassed to talk to him, and without your encouragement, I probably wouldn't be able to report such "progress" at this point. So, thank you SO much...I couldn't have done it without you guys...you guys are totally great.
Hopefully, I'll be able to report more progress down the road!
-Tom
"Whatever is sought for can be caught, you know,
whatever is neglected slips away."
Oedipus Rex, lines 126-127
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trevor
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Really getting into it |
Registered: November 2002
Messages: 732
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There will probably be some bumps in the road, and of course you may end up with a friend, not a boyfriend, but friends are great and necessary and you'd have more experience. Also, relationships can change over time, so just be cool and open to options regardless of the initial outcome. Go Tom! Go Tom!
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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hey just wanted to mention you did a great job following your gut...IE thinking you might be pusing things to far to fast.
great job so far and keeping you in my thoughts.
peace
tim...of USA
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I figure at least you have a new friend, if not a boyfriend. We could all use more of those!
Remeber, we're rootin for ya!
Kevin
"Be excellent to each other, and, party on dudes"!
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e
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On fire! |
Location: currently So Cal
Registered: May 2002
Messages: 1179
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Making friends is a good start. Don't seem too over-anxious, just a little contact each day taking it one step at a time.
Think good thoughts,
e
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