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Anybody in the MB family, especially with experience with women, please enlighten us about the accuracy of these definitions...some of them sound a lot like my Man in Thailand, actually...hehehe
Will women see the humour in these as much as men?
1. "Fine"
>
>This is the word women use at the end of any argument when they feel they
>are right but can't stand to hear you argue any longer. It means that you
>should shut up. NEVER use "fine" to describe how she looks. This will
>cause you to have one of those arguments.)
>
>2. "Five minutes"
>
>This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your
>football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so women feel
>that it's an even trade.
>
>
>3. "Nothing"
>
>"Nothing" means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is
>usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you
>inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an
>argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine."
>
>
>4. "Go Ahead" (with raised eyebrows)
>
>This is NOT permission; it's a dare! If you mistake it for permission, the
>result will be that the woman will get upset over "Nothing" and you'll
>have a "five-minute" discussion that will end with the word "Fine."
>
>
>5. "Go Ahead" (normal eyebrows)
>
>This is NOT permission, either. It means "I give up" or "do what you want
>because I don't care." You will get a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead" in just a
>few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in
>about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.
>
>
>6. "Loud Sigh"
>
>This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement very
>frequently misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are a
>complete idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and
>arguing with you over "Nothing."
>
>
>7. "Soft Sigh"
>
>Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are one of the few
>things that some men actually understand. It means she is momentarily
>content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe in the hope that the
>moment will last a bit longer.
>
>
>8. "Oh"
>
>This word --- followed by any statement --- is trouble. Example; "Oh, let
>me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night."
>If she says "Oh" before a statement, run, do not walk,to the nearest exit.
>She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes
>out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least two days.
>("Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a
>lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get a raised
>eyebrows "Go ahead", sometimes followed by acts so unspeakable that I can't
>bring myself to write about them.)
>
>
>9. "That's Okay"
>
>This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a
>man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard Before she has
>decided what the penalty will be for whatever you have done. "That's Okay"
>is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a raised eyebrow
>"Go Ahead". Once she has had time to plan it out, you are in for some
>mighty big trouble.
>
>
>10. "Please Do"
>
>This is not a statement, it is an offer. The woman is giving you the
>chance to come up with an excuse for what you have done. In other words, a
>chance to get yourself into even more trouble. If you handle this correctly, you
>shouldn't get a "That's Okay."
>
>
>11. "Thanks"
>
>The woman is thanking you. Don't faint and don't look for hidden meaning.
>Just say "you're welcome."
>
>
>12. "Thanks A Lot"
>
>"Thanks A Lot" is dramatically different from "Thanks." A woman will say
>"Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It is usually
>followed by the "Loud Sigh." This signifies that you have hurt her in some callous
>way. Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she
>will only tell you "Nothing."
"Always forgive your enemies...nothing annoys them quite so much." Oscar Wilde
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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No Message Body
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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Darren
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Likes it here |
Registered: January 1970
Messages: 190
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Seeing as though I seem to be spending most of my time in the dog house lately, it fits so well.
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ien
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Toe is in the water |
Location: Netherlands
Registered: April 2002
Messages: 81
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I see my husband in some of them, soooooooooooooo what's that mean???? Ya know, all these statements about women are about as accurate as those about men (or Gay men OR Gay women)
*giggles again* tho some things fit  *sighs*
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No Message Body
That which is dreamed can never be lost, can never be undreamed.
-Master Li in Neil Gaiman's Sandman
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Funny, altho perhaps not politically correct... 
And my Kevy here...... ROFLMAO..... 
