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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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I have just had a message from Robert's father to tell me that Stephen tried to end his own life, but was saved and is in hospital. He is stable. I have no other information yet.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Oh god, poor Stephen. I can understand how low he must have felt and so lonely. Please relay my hugs to Stephen and tell him he MUST come back to be with us. I cant write anymore..... too many tears and bad memories......
People have a habit of changing your direction through life
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smith
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On fire! |
Registered: January 1970
Messages: 1095
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Oh,poor poor Stephen. He must feel he is lost without Robert. Ohhhhhh!! My whole heart hurts for what he must have been feeling to do that.
{{{{hugs,Stephen}}}}
smith
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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I think this is really to us all, not simply to me:
I am currently at the home Robert and Stephen shared in order to use the computer to write to you now because I am sure that as a friend of Stephen you would want to know that he is in hospital having attempted to take his own life. His condition is stable and I believe that the loss of my son has affected him more than we could imagine.
I know that you are aware of the loss of my son and that you and Stephen have communicated to one another and that you have helped him through this time. Stephen speaks of you very highly and has great respect for you and your site and I know how much he values your friendship, as did my son. We, my wife and I, have also been comforted to know that a great many people cared for our son and continue to care for Stephen.
Stephen is, in essence, a very private person and he is like another son to my wife and I and I wish to thank you on behalf of us both, for the many friendships they have made through your website.
I made a reply, whcih I am also placing here, in part:
I don't know what to say.
I had feared he might attempt that. But his job here is not done. It is not his time. There is so much that he must tell you about how he and Robert met, how their love was on hold for so many years and precisely what Robert still means to him.
Robert is still beloved by all whom he touched. Stephen has acquired his mantle as our friend.
There was more, but deeply personal. I have offered Robert's father my phone number should he need to talk.
I offer prayers for both men, one in death, the other in grief. May they meet again when the time is right, and not a second earlier.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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I don't know what to say other then my thoughts and prayers goes out to him and his family and friends ..and hope he gets better soon ..
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trevor
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Really getting into it |
Registered: November 2002
Messages: 732
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I've been praying for our new friend.
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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Stephen, if you can read this, please try and understand that you need to go on. I know what you are thinking. You are wrong.......
Robert would be upset with you if you threw away what was taken from him by an accident.
We need to talk.....
Timmy can tell you how to get ahold of me.... Either by IM or telephone....
Marc
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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ien
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Toe is in the water |
Location: Netherlands
Registered: April 2002
Messages: 81
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No Message Body
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Charlie Smith
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Toe is in the water |
Registered: January 1970
Messages: 46
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No Message Body
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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Stephen remains stable and in hospital. He cried when he was told that I had been told. He feels ashamed and that he has let us down.
He has not.
He simply came to a place where he could then see no future.
He is loved by Robert's parents. He can make it. He WILL make it.
He is in great physical and emotional pain. With luck the physical pain will be the catharsis he needs.
Keep the messages coming here
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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Sometimes it is impossible to see beyond the fear of going on alone.
But Stephen, you are not alone. Robert lives in your heart, in your memories.
He wants you to be happy. He wants you to go on......
Marc
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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I don't really know what else to offer, so I hope the hugs will be enough.....Just keep fighting, eventually there'll be a better time
{{{{{hugs}}}}}
Setras
That which is dreamed can never be lost, can never be undreamed.
-Master Li in Neil Gaiman's Sandman
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tim...of usa
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Likes it here |
Location: buffalo, new york...USA
Registered: July 2002
Messages: 266
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as you all know i close all my MB posts with ..peace... well today i'd like each and every one of you to think of our brother and send to him some peacefull thoughts so that his heart may heal. i shall be doind so till the time i hear that he is back on his own two feet and again fighting the fight of healing.
i also have over 200 cyber friends that i will be dropping a line to and having them do the same.
i know the dark place he is in right now i rememer how hard it was to climb out of it...he needs our good thoughts and prayers now as strongly and intensly as we can possible do.
peace
tim...of USA
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Know that you are very dear to me!
Though the circumstances of us meeting were very sad, I am glad I did because Robert was so important to me even though I did not know it.
Now you are very important to me, and I am finding that out more and more as time goes by. Please allow me to be your friend. I need to be your friend. I need to get to know you. Can I do that?
I dedicated a story I'm writing to you and Robert. I hope Timmy will host it once it is finished.
I will email you. I hope you will reply! 
I carry lots of love in my heart, I have nobody to share it with. I would like to give some to you if you don't mind... With your permission of course. Like I said, I will email you, okay?
Warmest, friendliest hugs possible:
-Lenny
"But he that hath the steerage of my course,
direct my sail."
-William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, Act One, Scene IV
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e
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On fire! |
Location: currently So Cal
Registered: May 2002
Messages: 1179
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Though you don't spend much time here on the board, you ARE a valuable and important part of this community. We cannot afford to lose you. I do hope that you begin to feel better and decide to stay with us a while.
Think good thoughts (I'll be thinking some for you),
e
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Sorry I'm late with this, but I really don't know what to say...I was very upset when I heard this, but I am glad that he is recovering.
Especially since October (the 22nd was when I told Conor, of course...), I've had times where I thought my life was just totally useless and that nobody would ever, ever love me. I was just so dismal and depressed during that time that it hurt so much. A lot of tears.
I know Stephen's situation is much more serious than my boyhood problems, but I also know what it's like to feel like (pardon my French) shit. But I just hope Stephen knows that he has a whole "family" here that he can talk to -- we've all been in the crapper now and then.
-Tom
"Whatever is sought for can be caught, you know,
whatever is neglected slips away."
Oedipus Rex, lines 126-127
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mt
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Toe is in the water |
Registered: November 2002
Messages: 93
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No Message Body
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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Stephen has emergency surgery today because of his injuries. he is critical but stable. They stopped, we hope, internal bleeding. He has a broken leg and arm otherwise, and has a non serious back injury.
The main thing he has proved is that he could not fly unaided.
There will be more news when I have it.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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tim...of usa
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Likes it here |
Location: buffalo, new york...USA
Registered: July 2002
Messages: 266
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i'd bet an angel named robert helped break his fall....just my opinion.
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You could be right on that one ..
Because there are Angels out there and they do look after the ones the loves ..
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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I have just received an update from Robert's father on Stephen.
I have visited Stephen last evening and again today. He is still being monitored, but all hopes are that the operation to stem the internal injuries he appears to have sustained has been successful. Before I went today, I was able to visit your website through the link you provided and I was astounded at the many messages of support there were for him. I took the opportunity to print them off and took them with me.
Stephen was in tears to know that so many people had sent their love and support, their prayers and good wishes for him and said he didn't deserve to have such a warm and loving family. He said he was amazed at the support he had received following the death of Robert, but put that down to Robert having been an active participant in what he called Iomfats land, something Stephen says he has always been too afraid to be. He told me that he promises to get well very quickly and will send a personal message as soon as he is able.
I also told him that messages had been received from Gil, Marc and Warren on his normal email address and he said he would like to see them, so I will print them off for my next visit. He gave me the scholar e-mail address to retrieve messages from there, too and was particularly happy to have received one from Lenny. He smiled so brightly at that and asked, if at all possible for me to reply. I promised I would do so.
He is very tired, looks pretty mangled, but at least he is with us.
One final message from Stephen to you all - "God bless you"
Now, guys, to me it is obvious. We need to show Stephen that he is our friend as well as Robert
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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No Message Body
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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You deserve so much! We will be here for you, and I will be here for you also.
We all wish for you to come join us and share your burdens, experiences and just hang out, okay? Maybe smith will tell us one of his really bad, funny jokes and we can all laugh our asses off like always. Familiar territory for us, but new to you, you'll love it...
I promise.
{{{HUGS!}}}
Love:
-Lenny
"But he that hath the steerage of my course,
direct my sail."
-William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, Act One, Scene IV
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tim...of usa
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Likes it here |
Location: buffalo, new york...USA
Registered: July 2002
Messages: 266
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bro your jokes are baddddddddddddddddddddddddddd really badddddddddddddddddddddddd.
but there still funny.
hugs
peace
tim...of USA
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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From Robert's father:
Stephen looked so at peace today. He was sleeping when I arrived, so I took the opportunity to discuss certain things with the doctor. His physical injuries (broken leg, arm, cracked rib or two, bruising on most parts of his body, black eyes and all that go with such a fall) will heal. He is still being monitored, though he is no longer on their critical list. It would seem he has been exceptionally lucky. I know some of his friends on your website have indicated that a certain angel may have helped save him from serious harm and I smile to think this may be true.
There was more, but this is sufficient to show you that he will heal.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Oh I so wish for him to get better, and I'm happy to hear he doesn't seem to have suffered any permanent injuries!
I send LOVE to Stephen, and I think about him a lot. Get well soon okay, friend? I hope we'll be able to talk, I'd really like that!
-L
"But he that hath the steerage of my course,
direct my sail."
-William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, Act One, Scene IV
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Besides the obvious help from above that Stephen may have had:) I believe the thought of all those red roos standing 2+ metres tall may have had something to do with it? hehehe
Tim (Dad), please send my LARGE Hugs to Stephen and tell him the roos will protect him as long as needed
People have a habit of changing your direction through life
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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"Happy Birthday TomS - Enjoy the year and start counting down to your 18th", to your own son he sends "Birthday wishes and every happiness for the future", to Megaman - "Have a great birthday and keep up the good work." He also send this message to Ashley: "The Roos are really quite harmless, so long as you feed them!" and, finally, he says it hurts to laugh, so he hopes NOT to hear from smith, but sends his thanks for the kind thoughts. He also asked me to pass on his thanks to everyone for the messages he has received and promises that "once the tubes and things are out and as soon as he is able, he will post a personal message."
Today he was feeling brighter in himself. He had had a good night's sleep and continues to catch up on his sleep throughout the day. He is in pain, but the drugs and whatever are helping him with this.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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trevor
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Really getting into it |
Registered: November 2002
Messages: 732
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for you, Stephen. I'm sure others have e-mailed and still others are keeping you in their hearts and minds silently. I do hope you'll remember that and feel free to share with us, or just take comfort in knowing we are here and available.
This board is a great place to share the wonderful things happening in our lives, but is also a good place to share our anger, fear, and sorrow because no matter what you feel, someone and probably several someones here have almost certainly been in that exact spot before.
It is a place of safety because even though we have occasional misunderstandings and a variety of opinions and experiences like any family or community, we don't hurt or blame one another and can honestly share our feelings without worry, knowing others are here to support us or let us vent.
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trevor
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Really getting into it |
Registered: November 2002
Messages: 732
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No Message Body
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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I am half expecting the hopsital to discharge Stephen today. He will go to Robert's family's home for a while to get well. They have hijacked him.
Sometimes we need to be hijacked.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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I feel comforted by knowing Robert's parents care about Stephen to the extent they do. That's lovely and wonderful, knowing they care!
HUGS and LOVE for Stephen again of course!
-L
"But he that hath the steerage of my course,
direct my sail."
-William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, Act One, Scene IV
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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They almost kept him in hospital. He will have a longish recuperation period and has not lost his sense of humour. The computer is at the house, so he won;t be able to go to his own home untle he can carry it. I hope it's made of cast iron. He needs love around him, and if the pc is too heavy to shift, then he'll be stuck with that love.
He has limited use of his arms after the flight, so any messages he sends will be short and to the point. Don;t expect an acknowledgement of individual emails for ages, if at all, but SEND them. scholar@iomfats.org is open for email business
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Thanks for letting us know ..
I am glad he got someone around him that loves him and will help take care of him ..I know his Angel is looking out for him too ..
Good thoughts from canada ..
*** hugs ***
Rick .
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Stephen, if you read this, please know that the roos have been watching out for you and making sure nothing nasty comes near ya ok??
I hope you get well real soon and then ya can start emailing all the friends ya have here.  I will be sending ya one soon, maybe after all the others have sent theirs so you wont be laden with too many. Hugs for you from OZ
People have a habit of changing your direction through life
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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He is ashamed, but does not need to be. He is very sore. Three paragraphs took 30 minutes to type.
He will reply to everyone. It will just take him time and be very short messages.
He hopes we forgive him. I have said there is nothing to forgive, BUT that there damned well would have been if he had succeeded.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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And I have to agree with you Tim,
There is nothing to feel ashamed about. Not here, Not anywhere.
And there is nothing to forgive, Not here, not ever....
Thats what friends do. We stand with each other, by each other, for each other.... We dont ask why we are doing it, we just do it.
Because we're friends....
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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I haven't known what to say until now. Stephen, I'm so glad your home, I was very sad to hear what had happened, but do know that you have nothing to be ashamed of here with us. I haven't chatted with you or even emailed you, but from me to you, I forgive you. Please come and join us when you can.
I heard it hurts when you laugh, but have been told before that laughter is the best medicine, so I hope you get plenty of it.
Best Wishes
Brian
To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.
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OMG no 
Stephen, if you read this please click here! 
Update 
smith's really bad,funny jokes..wheee !! 
Update and personal messages from Stephen via Robert's dad 
