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a long over due note [message #3370]

Sat, 06 July 2002 18:16

tim...of usa

Likes it here

Location: buffalo, new york...USA
Registered: July 2002
Messages: 266

to matt:
dear matt a friend of mine brought you rushing back into my mind and i feel totally compled to sit down and let you know how i truly feel about you.
i know it was a long time ago that you made your choice to move on to a better place, a place of peace. at first i was hurt and angry as hell for what you did, not to your self but what you did to me. but now as the years have slipped by and i have grown into a man i know that you took that step in to the light to escape the pain, i too know that pain and i now can honestly say i am sorry that i did not help carry your pain and help you feel more at peace with your self in this life. i will forever question my self and wonder if, if a million times over..if i did this ... or if i had done that. (lol...for a 2 letter word "if" hold a ton of weight).
well more to the point my friend, i know that i never said this to you face to face but i loved you with all my heart and soul and to this day you are and always will be my one true love. even today i hold every one that comes in to that specail place in my life up to you goast to se if they mesure up.. none do, some come close but none ever do, and none ever will.
i now know that i have spent years in love with what could have been, its time to move on.
i was at your grave this morning and left you a gift, you'll know it when you see it, its long over due but it is yours now.

with all my love
tim

NOTE TO READERS: i read tim's story "the misfit" a few weeks back and it brought back my first love into my life. he killed himself when we were both young boys and discovering ourselfs in this mad mad world, that was my motivation for writing this note to matt my first love. i guess this is sort of my way of letting go and moving on.

you need not make commenet on this its just some thing i had to get out of my system

thanks for reading
and THANK YOU tim, your story as unhappy is it may be gave me back a bit of my life

later floks
tim

		a long over due note By: tim...of usa on Sat, 06 July 2002 18:16
		Tim, that was, well, so special... By: lenny on Sat, 06 July 2002 20:24
		Re: Tim, that was, well, so special... By: tim...of usa on Sun, 07 July 2002 03:07
		Letting go can be the hardest of things to do.... But... By: marc on Sun, 07 July 2002 00:00
		Re: Letting go can be the hardest of things to do.... But... By: tim...of usa on Sun, 07 July 2002 03:10
		Marc.. By: Guest on Sun, 07 July 2002 23:42
		Tears and Smiles By: Guest on Sun, 07 July 2002 01:17
		Re: Tears and Smiles By: tim...of usa on Sun, 07 July 2002 03:35
		Re: a long over due note By: tim...of usa on Sun, 07 July 2002 03:31
		Always By: e on Sun, 07 July 2002 04:01
		Re: a long over due note By: gil on Sun, 07 July 2002 22:23
		Re: a long over due note By: tim...of usa on Mon, 08 July 2002 00:23
		I had not expected the tale to help in that way By: tim on Mon, 22 July 2002 20:35

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