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Just got this email from a local friend. Even in the midst of life-threatening s**t, there can still be a laugh or two.
Yet another reason NOT to wear those damned face masks...heehee
A REAL SARs occurence - ONE DAY at TAN TOCK SENG HOSPITAL
This story was told by a nurse...and she swears this really happened on her ward.
A man suspected of SARs is lying in bed with a mask over his mouth.
A young auxiliary nurse appears to sponge his face and hands.
"Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask,"Are my testicles black?"
Embarrassed the young nurse replies, "I don't know Mr ******, I'm only here to wash your face and hands."
He struggles again to ask, "Nurse, Are my testicles black?"
Again the nurse replies, "I can't tell. I'm only here to wash your face and hands."
The Head Nurse was passing and saw the man getting a little distraught so she marched over to inquire what was wrong.
"Nurse," he mumbled, "Are my testicles black?"
Being a nurse of long-standing, the Head Nurse was undaunted.
She whipped back the bedclothes, pulled down his pajama trousers, moved
his penis out of the way, had a right good look, pulled up
the pajamas, replaced the bedclothes and announced,
"Nothing wrong with your testicles!!!"
At this the man pulled off his mask and asked again, "I SAID!!!!!: Are my test results back???"
"Always forgive your enemies...nothing annoys them quite so much." Oscar Wilde
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e
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On fire! |
Location: currently So Cal
Registered: May 2002
Messages: 1179
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Now THAT's funny!
Think good thoughts,
e
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A NUN'S STORY
A cab driver picks up a nun. She gets into the cab, and the cab driver
won't stop staring at her.
She asks him why he is staring and he replies, "I have a question to ask you
but I don't want to offend you."
She answers: "My dear son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as
I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about
everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would
find offensive."
"Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me."
She responds, "Well,
let's see what we can do about that:
#1, you have to be single and
#2 you must be a Catholic."
The cab driver is very excited and says,
"Yes, I am single and I'm Catholic
too!"
The nun says, "OK, pull into the next alley." He does and the nun
fulfills his fantasy with a big
wet kiss.
But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts
crying.
"My dear child." said the
nun, "Why are you crying?"
"Forgive me sister, but I have sinned. I
lied, I must confess, I'm married and a I'm a Lutheran."
The nun says, "That's OK, I'm on the way to a
Halloween party, and my name is
Kevin."
"Always forgive your enemies...nothing annoys them quite so much." Oscar Wilde
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smith
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On fire! |
Registered: January 1970
Messages: 1095
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Here's a really bad one:
A dad, mom and and three sons were getting ready to eat Thanksgiving dinner. The dad loaded his BB gun with three BBs, went out and shot a big turkey.
Dinner was delicious until one boy asks to be excused,
returning to cry, "Mommie...I was peeing and a BB came out." His mom said that was okay and not to worry and they continued to eat.
The second boy asked to be excused, returning to cry, "Mommie, I peed and a BB came out." His mom said not to worry and they contined to eat.
The third boy asked to be excused, returning to say, "MOMMIE.. MOMMIE," but before he could finish, his mom said, "Let me guess. You were peeing and a BB came out."
The boy cried, "No, I was jerking off and I shot the dog!!"
That one only deserves a groan...... 
JJ
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trevor
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Really getting into it |
Registered: November 2002
Messages: 732
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Dark humour... 
Thanks, David! Groan, J - but thanks, too! 
