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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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THE MAN NEEDS OUR SUPPORT. ROB
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13802
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Whenever he comes here, or asks by email
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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warren c. e. austin
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Likes it here |
Location: Toronto, Ontario, CANADA
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 247
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Rob
My "anonymous" e-Mailer (I do know who he is, and have often in recent months referred to him as being my conscience) has drawn my attention to this thread, and however well intentioned you may have been, I sincerely wish that you had not made this *post*.
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I reprint here, for all and sundry to read, the contents of the e-Mail I addressed to you that has prompted your action:
"Rob, just a brief note ...
... to advise you that I you are seldom far from my thoughts with these being always fondly remembered.
I'm adjusting to my life away from the cyber-world, with my having maintained some degree contact with many of those closest to me this past year or so. Within the last 6-weeks or so I've been on-line on average once every 4- or 5-days, often to do e-Mail, or simply surf for the pure hell of it, and find I'm getting more enjoyment from the experience now than I ever did throughout the many times in the past 6-months or more.
Emotionally I'm getting stronger every day that passes, with my bouts of uncontrolled weeping occurring far less frequently, and my getting well deserved rest at bedtime on average of two out of every three- or four-nights now as opposed to once in every 10-days or so, with that then only because of sheer exhaustion. I no longer find myself crying myself to sleep, nor am I awaking in abject terror of awaking at all..
It is lonely Rob; but I've known loneliness before, and I have again welcomed it, embracing it as an old friend, and not an enemy.
In time I may venture further afield and begin once again to return to the cyber-world; but candidly, I don't expect this will ever be likely.
I have my health; I'm recovering my emotional balance; I have food on my table and a roof over my head, and that of my two dogs - both of whom both simply adore me.
I have much to be thankful for. So many - far too many others - do not.
I, too, have a small coterie of friends - sadly, only one of which I've ever met in person - yourself included, all of whom I'm sure miss my oftentimes daily contact; but for now, this is all I can give in return.
With best wishes, and kindest personal regards,
I remain
Warren C. E. Austin
Toronto, Canada"
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I have no inclining as to just what the future may hold in store for me.
I presently have a Holding Company, which now has five equal partners (previously there were only three), myself, my two sons, and two brothers, one of the latter being one I had at one time hoped would become an active participant in the venture. I had resurrected a defunct enterprise, reincorporated it, and otherwise was prepared to recapitalize it as a going concern.
Unfortunately, this no-longer seems probable, and there the Company sits. Contracts that I had entered into to provide services under tender to others have been surrendered, and once again the Company lies dormant.
None of us apparently want it. I certainly don't; neither do either of the brothers; nor are my children capable presently of running it - what with the younger missing for more than a year now, and presumed dead by authorities, and the elder facing 10-years incarceration in a Canadian prison should my recent efforts to have him admitted to hospital for treatment of mental illness fail.
This in of itself is not tragic - the company has no assets other than 8 Domains (all of which are now parked and non-functional - although two were fully functional and capable of being revenue generating enterprises), and when their terms expire I will not renew any of them. I have already let my own family Domain lapse, with it extremely unlikely that I will ever again have a working presence on the Internet.
It had been suggested by another here at the Board that I involve a number of our younger Members in one or two of these ventures. This was a grand idea; one that I wholeheartedly endorsed, and to that I end I approached at least two - one of whom undertook the preliminary design of the content for one of the Domains. To both of these worthy youths, I apologize as it would now appear that I will no longer be able to fulfil upon promises I had made. I will undertake to find suitable places for them, and their ideas with associates of mine that might possibly be interested, as it would appear that I no longer am.
Many of you are aware of the unhealthy circumstances of my present living conditions. These are about to change - a change I might add that will be for the betterment of all concerned, including my brother.
Others of you have e-Mailed me, or peppered me with questions when you've been able to snare me in one of my infrequent appearances using one of the IM's, asking "Why?" I so suddenly left, and wanting details about the cryptic nature of my last *post*. To all, I have unequivocally answered, and once answer, "No comment"; nor will there ever be; whatever transpired which prompted such summary action on my part will forever and a day remain between the two of us immediately involved.
I now ASK ALL OF YOU to respect this, and not question either he or I further about this. It only causes needless renewed, and further, pain and anguish which neither he nor I truly should have to bear.
In response to others who have asked about my possibly returning to the Board, I truthfully tell you "I will not return."
I care deeply about this Board. I am firmly committed to its' purpose, and to all of those who call it home, and to all those who may have yet have discovered it; but, for reasons that uniquely my own, and no others, I cannot again become a part of this worthy and valuable endeavour.
I will continue to receive, and reply to all e-Mail; I will share a moment or two with any who accost me through one of the IM's should my passage be noted; I may from time to time *post* comments at other Boards; but, I will never again be a ongoing part of any.
I have returned to a World, somewhat kinder gentler than cyber-space (or at least to my thinking) - and one that I am fully capable of understanding. Rejoice with me in this decision. It is the best one I have made in a goodly long while, and one I should have had the backbone to have followed through with, when I first attempted this late last year. Had I done so then, the one person I have cared most for in 25-years would not have had to endure these past 8-weeks.
Warren C. E. Austin
Toronto, Canada
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13802
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Warren will come here when he needs to, and will remain a good friend to all who need it when he is able to. He is a tower of strength quietly behind the scenes.
I do not miss a friend I know is there. And I know he will ask when he needs something
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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war--i would gladly give you my heart. rob
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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these poor fools have not the foggiest concept as to whats it like to have your soul-mate ripped from your lifeand to be totally alone.i relate very much to marc.living without a soul sucks.for whats it worth,war,i love you and would share my soul. rob
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I THINK WE FORGOT ABOUT WARREN 
This is strictly a "one-off" folks, so DO NOT reply! 
Well that's what I meant. 
Re: This is strictly a "one-off" folks, so DO NOT reply! 
