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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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Just like Brian I go through crap days. Had one yesterday.
It was in the car, heading to a client meeting in Swindon (which is the back end of nowhere). I do my worst thinking in the car. And a wail came to me.
"Why," it went, "do I spend my life supporting other people and never get supported myself. Just for once I want someone to take care of me and tell me it's all going to be all right."
I am so sick of being the strong one at home, of carrying us through all the crap, of all the crap jobs I've done because I failed to find a career to interest me in any way at all.
I've done everything I can to make me whole. I've divested myself of John, the ghost. I've managed to take control of major parts of my life life fitness adn weight loss. I'm using a counsellor to handle chronic depression with pretty good success (yesterday was just an acute episode I suppose).
But I have no fun, no adrenaline, in my life. No excitement. Just the prospect of wondering until I die if I will ever be happy. I mean truly happy.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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tim...of usa
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Likes it here |
Location: buffalo, new york...USA
Registered: July 2002
Messages: 266
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ya know what i have those EXACT same feelings form time to time...more latly.
i spent a good part of yesterday bitching about everything under the sun to ED and it helped, did not slove a damn thuing but it felt good.
i creat most of if not all the messes in my life and i have to just sit back and wonder why the hell i do it to my self over and over....some times i think i like feeling like crap about my self, silly right?
but ya know what?
yesterday sucked
today is ok so far
and tommorow will be as good as i allow it to be
hugs timmy
peace
tim...of USA
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No Message Body
To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.
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trevor
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Really getting into it |
Registered: November 2002
Messages: 732
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I can relate too well, especially ATM when I'm hating my job. Feel free to package up some bile in an e-mail and send it my way for permanent toxic-waste disposal if you like.
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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No Message Body
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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Sorry guys, I've figured out my problem. The past few days, I've been well totally and completely "frustrated". I've got some apologising to do to some people that were in the crossfire at the time. Sure hope I don't go through that again.
Brian
To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.
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