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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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My primary purpose in founding this messagebaord was and remains to create a place where those who have been abused, or are stressed, or have other challnges may come without fear and consider how best tostart to unburden themselves
When we answer such a person, almost always the last thing they wish for is to be instructed in what they "must do now". Usually they were abused in that manner. "Now, you must...... Or....." Do you see what I mean?
A suggestion, a set of choices that they may ignore after reading, that is valid. PLease, most of us know this by instinct. Please can we think first, just a little longer, and see what the person who needs help truly needs inside themselves.
We cannot know where another person stands until we have walked a mile in his moccasins. So let us learn to learn
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Timmy, we owe you such a debt for this place and the woderful people it has attracted. You really are the best.
Thanks for being you,
Love,
Kevin
"Be excellent to each other, and, party on dudes"!
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smith
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On fire! |
Registered: January 1970
Messages: 1095
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May I just say that when I came here a little over a year ago, my life was totally out of control and if it hadn't been for some very kind people who never 'told' me what to do but just quietly suggested thoughts, I'd have been just another casuality of abuse. I am actually able to talk about it now and centralize myself.
Kids want structure....they want someone to listen. The one thing they don't want is someone 'telling' them what to think, what to feel. That's one of the reasons they try to find help. Grownups are in charge.....no matter what they do or say to kids. We just have to work out ways to make it in spite of what happens to us.
Tough love is for kids who are making their own problems, not for kids who have no control over what happens to them. No one should EVER talk harshly to anyone who is asking for help. My grandpa always said you get better results using honey, not vinegar. I believe him.....
Please keep timmy's MB a place where kids can feel comfortable enough to say what they need to so they can survive. Everyday is like walking a tightrope for all of us who have been hurt and it's too easy to fall off.
smith
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No Message Body
"Be excellent to each other, and, party on dudes"!
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ien
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Toe is in the water |
Location: Netherlands
Registered: April 2002
Messages: 81
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No Message Body
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Here Here, I couldn't agree more .... 
