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Last night I was driving through town, and something brought back a memory, and some thoughts too. The memory brought to mind that I must have known I was gay back quite a ways back. The memory was something that I thought would be the perfect way of life. At the time, I wanted to drive truck with a big sleeper unit on it, and a Hot guy that wanted the same. Just travel the country, make money, and sleep in either hotels, or the sleeper on the truck. Nobody but me and him.
Sounds stupid, but "then" it sounded like a life to have.
Brian
To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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sounds like what i want to do right when i get out of school. i want to travel the country and just relax see things find my self...i wish i could take one of my gourguoes boys with me but...ahh anyways u arnt alone i get that 2 well i get that alot...juyst wanting a perfect life with someone i love...
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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Lord yes. Can't put my finger on such a good example, but yes.
I know. Following Nick Jones off the rugby pitch when I was 13 and getting rock hard looking at the backs of his legs! And wanting him. Not his face, just his legs! And only remembering that recently.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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trevor
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Really getting into it |
Registered: November 2002
Messages: 732
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And my friend remembered a few "moments" that I had forgotten as well, but the more I think, the more I remember "forgotten" moments.
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For me it was a log cabin in Canada with me and Ray (not his real name). I had romantic thoughts of laying on a bear-skin rug in front of the fire.
I remain a hopeless romantic even today.
Kinda sick huh? hehe
Hugs,
Kevin
"Be excellent to each other, and, party on dudes"!
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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Howz about this? Eons ago, (while living in the snow belt near the Canadian border) I began yearning for palm trees, white sand beaches that never got cold enough to have to avoid swimming...and sex on the beach with a non-specified (at that time) guy. Wasn't even love or romance then, just hormone driven sex...hehehe
Now I live near that beach, and we don't have sex there because...ummm...of getting sand in the various bits...which never figured in the fantasy, let me tell you!
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YOu know the call of the open road has always influenced me. I've wanted to do nothing but travel and meet new people ever since I was young. Must be the military kid thing, pull up stakes every three years and start over someplace new. Even now I get the urge to just chuck it all and go cruising the highways until I run out of gas.
Is it a crazy dream? Probably. Is it far fetched and impractical? Oh, most definitely. But would I do it in a heartbeat, especially if I had the right heartbeat beside me to do it with (and all which that implies!)? Let's just say...."Bang - Zoom!" Wouldn't even have to think twice.
And yeah, every once in a while I get that wild urge to just bolt down the road only several kilometers a second shy of the speed of sound, just break out and leave this boring, no-account, one-horse, flea bitten, nerve racking, small minded, backwater, redneck town. Actually, that's more like all the time, LOL, But I just know that if I don't do it right, I'll end up back here again singing "Clowns to the left of me, Jokers to the right, here I am, stuck in the middle with you!"
Oh well. If that dream ever becomes real, someone remind me to tell everyone else how I did it. It might take a while, but I'd rather meet friends from far away than keep bumping into strangers from far too close to my mailing address.
Cya,
D'Artagnon
It's not the wolf you see you should fear, but all the ones he howls with. Don't be afraid of the song, but don't piss off the choir.
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e
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On fire! |
Location: currently So Cal
Registered: May 2002
Messages: 1179
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I was having "gay" fanfasies long before I figured out (or even suspected) that I might be gay. The first one I can remember was wanting this really cute boy in my fourth grade class to be my boyfriend. I used to fantasize about having him come to live with me and my family and stay in my room, sleeping in my bed and getting to see him naked (at that point I had never seen another naked boy my age). I tried to make that fantasy come true (partially) but his parents would never allow him to sleep over at anyone's house.
I had many fantasies like that as a kid but never came close to realizing that I was gay.
Think good thoughts,
e
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Could it become a story you think? 
I remember from, uh, not sure exactly when, but it was probably before third grade in school, making me at most eight years old. I was standing in line for lunch in school and I accidentally bumped the back of my hand into the butt of the next guy in line. It was in the 70s, so we wore these satin pants indoors and they were really soft to the touch, and his butt was warm and firm.
I remember thinking for the first time EVER, touching someone else's butt felt NICE! I had previously considered them to be just kind of yucky, but this felt really nice. I touched him for no more than two seconds or so because I didn't want him to notice what I was doing, but of course he didn't. Kids generally don't seem to notice such things, but I still didn't dare to cop a deliberate feel of him (or anyone else really) like that again for years I think. I know now I could have, easily, but...alas. That's the way it happened. Wish I could go back and try again! 
-L
"But he that hath the steerage of my course,
direct my sail."
-William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, Act One, Scene IV
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e
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On fire! |
Location: currently So Cal
Registered: May 2002
Messages: 1179
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I damn near fell off my chair the first time I saw Mrs. Doubtfire. Eddie looked almost exactly like Matthew Lawrence did in that movie, hairstyle and all.
The daydream did have a happy ending, of sorts. We were in the same gym class in 8th grade and I made sure my locker was right next to his all year long. So eventually, I did get to see him naked, many times.  But that was the extent of it. He moved away over the summer and I never saw him again (except in my dreams).
I don't know about making a story out of my daydream. We were much too young at the time. But I could base a character on Eddie as he gets older. I certainly had some good fantasies about him over the years.
Think good thoughts,
e
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Couldn't resist the Airplane reference, mwhahahaha.
But, yeah, I can remember back in 6th grade even checking out the guys in the locker room. Granted, in our middle school, we never did the "full monty", but I saw a lot of kids in just underwear. I vividly remember checking out these two boys...Chris and Brian...mmm. Anyway, about the fantasies...
I've already told you about the best fantasy I had, and no, it was NOT dirty, hehe! In World Religions class, our teacher had frequent meditations where we could space out or lay our heads on our desks or what ever. So, one time, I put my head down and I had this vision that I was standing in our school's cafeteria, and Conor was standing there, wearing his favorite hooded sweatshirt, and I just hug him, and he hugs me back. Now, the freaky part about this whole thing is that I could feel the fabric of the sweatshirt on my arms. No joke. It was that soft, cold feeling that you get when you touch a sweatshirt. Hehe, now you all think I'm nuts.
Every summer though, my favorite fantasy is being on a beach at night with a boy. You know, the warm night air and the sea breeze, wearing hooded sweatshirts and shorts, holding hands on the boardwalk, frolicking in the sand, and topping the night off with some cuddling in the lifeguard stand.
Maybe I've gotten off topic. Oh, who cares! I had a fun time going off topic anyway.
-Tom
"Whatever is sought for can be caught, you know,
whatever is neglected slips away."
Oedipus Rex, lines 126-127
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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Oh right! When you were young
I know this is silly, but my fantasies are in my stories. That's why they exist at all, the stories.
Chris and Nigel came form a beach fantasy. Nigel was real. Golden legs, straw blond hair. And I wanted to put sun lotion on him. He was never naked in the fantasy. Red trunks. Sort of like larger Speedos. Face down, never face up. And so silky soft.
We did have total communal nudity at school. Oddly Nigel was one of the few I never saw naked. Just almost naked. He teased, you see, on purpose.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Does this happen to anyone else?? 
Re: Does this happen to anyone else?? 
Re: Does this happen to anyone else?? 
Back when I was young....... 
