A Place of Safety
I expect simple behaviours here. Friendship, and love.
Any advice should be from the perspective of the person asking, not the person giving!
We have had to make new membership moderated to combat the huge number of spammers who register
















You are here: Home > Forum > A Place of Safety > General Talk > The sanctity if anonymity.........
The sanctity if anonymity.........  [message #19002] Sat, 03 January 2004 03:49 Go to next message
marc is currently offline  marc

Needs to get a life!

Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729



Is not a thing to be trifled with. It is not a thing to be broken.

Under any circumstances!

If time is taken to think clearly there are always ways to achieve goals without breaking this sacred confidence.

Only the most callus, uncaring, self serving, sanctimoniusly unthinking kind of person would break this trust.

There is no defense! There is no excuse!!

I am utterly outraged!!!



Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
icon7.gif Re: The sanctity if anonymity.........  [message #19003 is a reply to message #19002] Sat, 03 January 2004 05:49 Go to previous messageGo to next message
kevin is currently offline  kevin

On fire!
Location: Somewhere
Registered: September 2002
Messages: 1108




While I was a little upset that the cops woke me up with a flashlight in my face. I do kknow it was because my friends care about me.

So it is hard for me to be upset by it.

Maybe a little frightened, but even if I try to be mad, I cannot.

Kevin



"Be excellent to each other, and, party on dudes"!
Re: The sanctity if anonymity.........  [message #19004 is a reply to message #19003] Sat, 03 January 2004 05:58 Go to previous messageGo to next message
misplaced is currently offline  misplaced

Really getting into it
Location: michigan; united states.
Registered: September 2003
Messages: 721




...the cops? wtf did i miss? are you ok? no one's freaking answering me and now i'm really worried.

wtf do i even try. wow. well i hope you ARE okay, whatever happened. i'm glad people managed to like, figure that out?



my void does not want.

-- 2.13.61.
Re: The sanctity if anonymity.........  [message #19005 is a reply to message #19004] Sat, 03 January 2004 06:01 Go to previous messageGo to next message
jaman is currently offline  jaman

Likes it here
Location: Northern California
Registered: October 2003
Messages: 336




It's no big deal.
There was a mis-understanding.



You said when you'd die that you'd walk with me every day
And I'd start to cry and say please don't talk that way
With the blink of an eye the Lord came and asked you to meet
You went to a better place but He stole you away from me
Re: The sanctity if anonymity.........  [message #19006 is a reply to message #19005] Sat, 03 January 2004 06:17 Go to previous messageGo to next message
misplaced is currently offline  misplaced

Really getting into it
Location: michigan; united states.
Registered: September 2003
Messages: 721




eheh. that seems to be an understatement.

had i known, i live close enough i could have driven instead of say, cop drama or scaring the hell out of what i know to be not JUST me, who's read all this.

but then there's that privacy sanctum and all.

thanks though, christopher, for giving some kind of answer. Smile i appreciate and shall relax. Smile



my void does not want.

-- 2.13.61.
Disreguard the chatter and focus on the issue  [message #19008 is a reply to message #19002] Sat, 03 January 2004 08:07 Go to previous messageGo to next message
marc is currently offline  marc

Needs to get a life!

Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729



Personal information is a trust!!!!!

That trust has been broken!!!!!

It has nothing to do with someone supposedly in distress!!!!!



Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
Whatever "The Issue" was...  [message #19009 is a reply to message #19008] Sat, 03 January 2004 10:59 Go to previous messageGo to next message
david in hong kong is currently offline  david in hong kong

On fire!
Location: American working in Thail...
Registered: February 2002
Messages: 1101




Should be worthy of full disclosure and discussion here on the MB, OR all reference should be kept OFF the MB and in the realm of emails and private chats.

This trying to have something both ways (with a partial disclosure and veiled references) could be embarressing to those who do know the details and either annoying or alarming to those who do not.

So. As I said...

Either talk about something here fully, or please PLEASE don't mention it at all.



"Always forgive your enemies...nothing annoys them quite so much." Oscar Wilde
Re: Whatever "The Issue" was...  [message #19010 is a reply to message #19009] Sat, 03 January 2004 11:09 Go to previous messageGo to next message
marc is currently offline  marc

Needs to get a life!

Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729



Just read Warren's thread.

It is blatently self explanatory.



Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
OK.... And I will try to be civil.....  [message #19011 is a reply to message #19009] Sat, 03 January 2004 11:21 Go to previous messageGo to next message
marc is currently offline  marc

Needs to get a life!

Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729



The "issue" is the fact that my name was placed on this message board without my knowledge or permission.

Rightly so it was done with good intentions but nevertheless was a direct breach of trust.

The person responsible was Warren C.E. Austin....

I will not place my opinion of him here at this time.... I am far too pissed to think straight....

Just let me add....

It is the right of each person to set the limits they are comfortable with as far as retaining privacy reguarding public forums. When this information is passed along to a "so called" friend and then is publicly displayed it constitutes a most base breach of protocol.



Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
icon4.gif That thread no longer exists. Serious message inside  [message #19012 is a reply to message #19010] Sat, 03 January 2004 12:18 Go to previous messageGo to next message
timmy

Has no life at all
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796



Put simply I saw a thread that identified a perosn by full name when I know their name was not a matter of public record.

I understand some sort of emergency or perceived emergency existed.

There is one set of matters that transcend anonymity. Matters of life and death. I perceived from the thread I removed that this was such a matter. I also appreciate marc's point about achieving results by other means.

The revealing of full name, etc, had no additional purpose in finding contact details for our friend, since not many people actually know his name. And those who do will know who he is anyway.

I suspect it was revealed in panic. One does that when one panics. If our friend can forgive the person who posted the name then I think we all can, too.

I note the sense of valid outrage Marc has expressed. I share his concerns. We have acted in unity before to prevent real or perceived tragedies, and done it by very fast and determined networking. In general this is fatser than posting a message on a board, though that has a place, too.

There is a lesson here.

The lesson is to act always in the best interests of the person in perceived danger, both short and long term. It is unlikely that those best interests are met by announcing his or her name.



Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
Let's treat this as a lesson  [message #19013 is a reply to message #19011] Sat, 03 January 2004 12:21 Go to previous messageGo to next message
timmy

Has no life at all
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796



With goodwill the lesson can be learned. I think it probably has been already. I share your concerns, and your outrage. I am simply calling for gentle words on the matter, and a cooling of the outrage.



Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
It was for the right reasons..... Warren.... Please read...  [message #19014 is a reply to message #19013] Sat, 03 January 2004 12:29 Go to previous messageGo to next message
marc is currently offline  marc

Needs to get a life!

Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729



While I would sternly pinch you (in a very tender place) Warren for placing my name on the MB.

I know it was done with a hugely good heart, and nothing but the best intentions.

I guess I can not fault you for that.... He is after all my friend as well....

Huggs you tight....
and a peck on the cheek....

Your friend
Marc



Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
Re: Whatever "The Issue" was...  [message #19025 is a reply to message #19009] Sun, 04 January 2004 03:51 Go to previous messageGo to next message
misplaced is currently offline  misplaced

Really getting into it
Location: michigan; united states.
Registered: September 2003
Messages: 721




that and it makes those of us who are told we are supposed "good" or "best" friends feel extremely stupid and worthless that something so apparently huge and heady went down that it has to come half on the board, all vague and super secret (but only partly), that only certain special people know.

so yeah, it's become something beyond the issue now, which is partly my fault with my responses, but what else would it be given how it's come up around here.

but while i have my post box up concerning this--i'd ask that people stop fluffing me up as some awesome friend or faction of one that i'm not. few things other than finding out my supposed "best friend" had some huge crisis/misunderstanding way below radars has made me feel more shitty.

ok, end "chatter" now, sorry for it.



my void does not want.

-- 2.13.61.
Re: Whatever "The Issue" was...  [message #19026 is a reply to message #19025] Sun, 04 January 2004 05:41 Go to previous messageGo to next message
jaman is currently offline  jaman

Likes it here
Location: Northern California
Registered: October 2003
Messages: 336




I just e-mailed you at your MSN address.
I tried at your regular e-mail, but it was not delivered.



You said when you'd die that you'd walk with me every day
And I'd start to cry and say please don't talk that way
With the blink of an eye the Lord came and asked you to meet
You went to a better place but He stole you away from me
Re: Whatever "The Issue" was...  [message #19027 is a reply to message #19025] Sun, 04 January 2004 06:08 Go to previous messageGo to next message
marc is currently offline  marc

Needs to get a life!

Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729



The ISSUE......

Was the fact that someone chose to place my entire name on the message board.

I did not want my name to be plastered on the message board.

That is why I do not use my whole name on the message board.

Therefore when mt name is places on the message board without ny permission I feel as if something very precious was stolen from me.

And that "something is" the fact that I wished my presence here to be a private thing.

Which now it is not.

If this is not clear enough, or seems only half presented, please let me know and I will try to elaborate on it further.



Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
Re: Whatever "The Issue" was...  [message #19030 is a reply to message #19027] Sun, 04 January 2004 11:09 Go to previous message
timmy

Has no life at all
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796



There was a second issue, coz someone else's name was also placed there in full. But we know better now, even if we did not before.

There was another issue. that seems to be private, now. And should stay that way here, at least. I have no idea what it was, and I have no need to know, either.



Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
Previous Topic: Cute!
Next Topic: Poetry Tyme? or just Thinking out loud?
Goto Forum: