|
|
marc
|
 |
Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
|
|
|
I have been violated..... Granted it was not a physical attack..... and basically I understand that it was an error in judgement made in the confusion and heat of a crisis.
But there is another side to this....
I have never placed my full name on the board or my own website or on any of my stories.
I do this for a reason. I also should not have to explain those reasons. If this is indeed a community that is a "place of safety" as it is touted to be, then it should be understood that ones privacy reguarding their private life is important.
Isn't it enough that it is important to me? Why does it have to be important to everyone for an issue to hold some validity?
All I want to know is why ?
Is it because it is me?
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Marc, I posted something that said my opinion yesterday. IT IS important, it's not you. I'm sure that Kevin, who said he's experienced the same problem felt a little mad when he felt it. However, my opinion, is that though partially it is a board issue, it is more an issue that should be dealt privately, neutrally OFF the board. As long as you two talk at least neutrally together, you can get the issue resolved. The main issue that I see is that you're bringing the issue onto the board, and causing tension. The issue at hand IS important, but when you continually, almost everyday, complain about the issue, people become less interested. If you bring this off the board, so that it only is between you and the poster, the issue can be resolved much quicker, rather than dragging it along. Truthfully, your gung-ho attitude about this may have the author of the post uneasy about posting back, despite your saying that all you're looking for is an apology. You have brought it up to head, that we should not "out" people to the world, and you've gotten that message across, but by continually posting and posting about it, you make people more and more disinterested. It has NOTHING to do with you as a person, it's just the approach you're taking. Please, if you want a resolution to the issue, take the issue privately with the person who made the error in judgement so you can move on. Please remember to be neutral though, as anger only leads you to nowhere. At least neutrality will get you some resolution. Good luck with getting this resolved
Al
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
marc
|
|
Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
|
|
|
Well i certainly dont want to cause tension....
I think i should just vacate...
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Steve
|
 |
Really getting into it |
Location: London, England
Registered: November 2006
Messages: 465
|
|
|
Marc, please let me offer my two groats'-worth.
Your indignation is understandable and justified. Your expectation of an apology is probably also justified. But all of us in similar situations must recognize that there comes a moment when we must cut our losses.
You have made your point eloquently. You have also intimated that you no longer expect a public apology; but even if you do, you must know by now that you are not going to get one. (If you had been able to deal with this offline in all probability whoever it was would have apologised profusely; but once you made it public you also made it very difficult for him or her to do so.)
So.... let it drop. Now is the time to be bighearted and generous. You have made your point and no one disagrees with you. Let's move on. And you, please, move on to another wonderful story.
Hugs.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Noooooo that's not my point Marc. I was merely saying by repeatedly posting, made people start to have less sympathy towards you. *sigh* Marc, I don't want you to feel angry or even some discomfort for what you want to go through. *hug* Marc, i don't want you to leave, and as long as this board is here, some tension level will be here at some times or another. All I'm trying to say is talk to the person who did this in private. Marc, you seem like a caring guy and I don't want to turn you away. go ahead and send me an email and you can rant about this all you want. I'll listen.  Just remember Marc *HUG* if you want an apology, then it doesn't hurt to just let him know politely in private that you were unhappy with him posting his full hame. Marc, if i'm pushing you out of this group, well you shouldn't leave, I should leave. I'm not creating an atmosphere that is accepting of others. Sorry for that. I hope to see you stay.:-/
Al
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
marc
|
|
Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
|
|
|
K.........:'-(
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
I stand with you, Marc. I don't know all the particulars and I don't think I need to. But you have always struck me as someone with deep insights, deep emotions and a perspective that is definitely outside the box. And these are things that I chreish about you, as many others here do as well. If you feel you must leave, I cannot stop you. I do wish you wouldn't go, however. You have been grieviously afflicted, probably by an act of casual carelessness or omission of the common courtesy and respect of our forum here. And while the honorable person, no matter how righteous said person feels the point of the argument to be, would at least accept responsibility for the error and appologize to you in some way for mishandling a situation. And I understand you taking a stand for decency and restraint around here. Such pauses to test the air and think things through are essential to what was essentially created to be an advice board. I commend you wholly for standing by your principles and not sinking to the level of insult heaped upon you. Oaks are strong because they can bend in the wind as well as remain grounded and firm.
I stand by you.
D'Artagnon
It's not the wolf you see you should fear, but all the ones he howls with. Don't be afraid of the song, but don't piss off the choir.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
e
|
 |
On fire! |
Location: currently So Cal
Registered: May 2002
Messages: 1179
|
|
|
No one should be made to feel unsafe in coming here. No one should have their full name published here without their consent. Period. You have a right to complain here on the board and privately if you wish. However, dwelling on it is getting you nowhere. Voice your concerns whether the matter concerns only you or everyone. But there is no need to continually bring up the issue. If I recall correctly, you were offeded by one post. One post should have been sufficient for you to voice your concern. Also if I recall correctly, timmy removed the offending post. Therefore your concern was heard and acted upon. You may want an apology from the offending party, but if one is not forthcoming, it won't make a difference how many times you ask for one. The offence was committed, the complaint was heard, appropriate action was taken. It may not have been everything you wanted, but it's apparently all you are going to get. Let it go.
{{HUGS}}
Think good thoughts,
e
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
I agree with D'Artagnon. I know it seems that i'm being harsh, but I do commend you on persistance and your sticking to your stance, given the responses I've seen. *HUG* Marc, things will work out in the long run. I guess by now (i don't know how long ago it's been since the issue started) are truly wondering whether you're going to get an apology from the person, and I can't say whether he will or not, given I don't even know who he is, and I don't want to really know. All I have to say is continue to be strong, and hope that the guy will give you an apology. I just hope that this doesn't drive you from the group, nor cause some resentment towards the board. *HUG* Marc, I really do commend you on your strength, but I'm not sure whether it'll help not only the group, but yourself, if you continue to post publicly your feelings 'bout this. You spend so much energy talking about this, the longer you let this go on, the deeper it will affect you. The person was wrong, and I hope he had no malicious intent in doing it, but does need to apologize. However, by picking at an open wound will only make things worse. Marc, be strong inside, and work through your issue. I'm here if you want to talk to me about this either aim me, or send me an email. I hope I can help you through this. Hope you feel better Marc,
Al
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
marc
|
|
Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
|
|
|
I already know I will not get an appology.
I recieved a very acidic email from the person stating so.
I shall not bring it up again.
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
marc
|
|
Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
|
|
|
Whats a groat??????
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Old British coin, 4 pence.
You said when you'd die that you'd walk with me every day
And I'd start to cry and say please don't talk that way
With the blink of an eye the Lord came and asked you to meet
You went to a better place but He stole you away from me
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Steve
|
|
Really getting into it |
Location: London, England
Registered: November 2006
Messages: 465
|
|
|
Marc wrote:
> Whats a groat??????
It's a very old English coin now only used by old goats.
|
|
|
|
|
Goto Forum:
|
] 
A Place of Safety
Search
Help
Register
Login
Home
Re: Why doesn't it matter??????? 
