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You are here: Home > Forum > A Place of Safety > General Talk > Joke of the Day---Add One Yourself If Ya Wanna!
icon7.gif Joke of the Day---Add One Yourself If Ya Wanna!  [message #19689] Sat, 07 February 2004 03:46 Go to next message
david in hong kong is currently offline  david in hong kong

On fire!
Location: American working in Thail...
Registered: February 2002
Messages: 1101




Jesus and Satan were having an ongoing argument about who was better at using the computer. They had been going at it for days, and God was tired of hearing all the bickering.


Finally, God said, "Cool it. I am going to set up a test which will take two hours and it will judge who does the better job."


So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away.


They moused.


They did spreadsheets.


They wrote reports.


They sent faxes.


They sent e-mail.


They sent out e-mail with attachments.


They downloaded.


They did some genealogy reports.


They made cards.


They did every known job.


But, ten minutes before the time was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, the rain poured, and of course, the electricity went off. Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the underworld.


Jesus just sighed.


The electricity finally flickered back on, and each of them restarted their computers. Satan started searching frantically screaming, "It's gone!


It's all gone! I lost everything when the power went out!"


Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all his files from the past two hours.


Satan observed this and became even more irate. "Wait! He cheated! How did he do it??!!"


God shrugged and said,



"Jesus Saves."



"Always forgive your enemies...nothing annoys them quite so much." Oscar Wilde
icon7.gif I'll be back with one but.............  [message #19698 is a reply to message #19689] Sat, 07 February 2004 16:40 Go to previous messageGo to next message
smith is currently offline  smith

On fire!

Registered: January 1970
Messages: 1095



the joke you told was scary Sad) cause I printed it out and showed it to my dad, who thinks that Jesus and jokes do NOT belong together......and he laughed Surprised Hahaha !! That is a very cool joke. smith
Re: Joke of the Day---Add One Yourself If Ya Wanna!  [message #19699 is a reply to message #19689] Sat, 07 February 2004 17:22 Go to previous messageGo to next message
timmy

Has no life at all
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796



Well, as a joke it is not one to tell but one to look at: http://www.technicalvirgin.com/



Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
icon12.gif As long as we're talking God and computers...  [message #19704 is a reply to message #19689] Sat, 07 February 2004 18:43 Go to previous message
e is currently offline  e

On fire!
Location: currently So Cal
Registered: May 2002
Messages: 1179



One day God was looking down at Earth and saw all of the evil that was going on. He decided to send an angel down to Earth to check it out. So He called one of His best angels and sent the angel to Earth for a while. When she returned she told God, yes it is bad on Earth, 95% is bad and 5% is good.

Well, He thought for a moment and thought maybe He'd better send down a second angel to get another point of view. So God called another angel and sent him to Earth for a time too. When the angel returned he went to God and told him "Yes, the Earth is in decline. 95% is bad and 5% is good." God said this was not good.

So He decided to send e-mail to the 5% that were good. He wanted to encourage them, give them a little something to help them keep going.

Do you know what that e-mail said?

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Oh, you didn't get one either, huh? Bummer.

;-D ;-D Sad) Sad) ::-)

Think good thoughts,
e
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