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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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I am building a new poll asking about anal sex and being gay. It will be multiple answer. It will look at reasosn why anal sex is not considered desirable by those who do not wish to doit.
I am open to ideas to turn into poll questions, please.
I need short sentences like "I feel that the anus is dirty" and "It is a social taboo" and thinsg like that.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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sparks
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Toe is in the water |
Registered: January 1970
Messages: 57
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I would never use my lover as a female.The thought of anal intercourse is so repugnent to me.This is only my opinion and I am not going to judge others by my standards.However it should be noted that the practice of anal intercourse several decades ago and even today seems to be the biggest factor in the spread of AIDS. s
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Timmy, one question should prolly be something like, "I do not engage in anal sex due to religious belief."
Another statement could be "I don't do that due to fear of diseases".
Another perhaps could be "I don't do that because it makes me feel like an object rather than a valued person."
Another could be "I reserve anal loving for committed partners, and not casual ones. It's a sign of a committed relationship for me."
Another could be "Anal sex is part of my sexual practice because it makes me feel physically and emotionally closer to my partner than anything else we do together." Shorter version..."Anal sex makes us both feel as one..."
Another one might be "Anal loving allows me a chance to show complete trust and openness to my partner"
sparks...countless people have mutually satisfying sex without either partner considering that they are being "used" or "using".
And you're wrong about anal intercourse causing AIDS. UNPROTECTED anal sex contributes to risk. Big difference. Should straight people not engage in intercourse because UNPROTECTED intercourse may cause pregnancy and exposure to STD's? I don't think so!
But I'm glad to hear that you're not judging others by your standards for yourself.
"Always forgive your enemies...nothing annoys them quite so much." Oscar Wilde
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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This is one of the hardest polls I have constructed. It's a challenge to keep my own opinions out of the questions. Now it is not live, so there is no point yet in voting. It's here for you to comment on until I get it right. I think it's close.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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sparks wrote:
> I would never use my lover as a female.
I understand this thought. I felt for a long time that my overwhelming need to be a 'bottom' somehow made me less of a man. It took me many years to understand that the role taken during mutually satisfying sex has nothing to do with masculinisation nor feminisation.
It can be difficult to learn that a body is just a body. And that it has areas where pleasure may be given and received. And that being given pleasure has nothinbg to do with gender roles.
The first time I said, out loud, to a friend, "My overwhelming need is to give myself to my partner and to be penetrated by him" I cried. Half was deep embarrassment at this odd taboo, and half was the relief in saying the words. But I can say to you clearly that I am not feminine, nor effeminate in my needs, nor am I "submissive", except in a "classic sexual theory" sense. What I need to do is to give my trust totally to my partner. That is a gift I bestow actively and may withdraw at any time. I, thus, have all the power.
This topic is worthy of discussion, especially since there are no right and wrong answers.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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It is not perfect. It's clinically worded for a start, but it is live, warts and all.
The wording may be off-putting for some. I'm sorry. I can't see how to improve it.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Steve
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Really getting into it |
Location: London, England
Registered: November 2006
Messages: 465
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Why is this poll available only to members of the forum? Just curious.
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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Often a proxy server or persistent cache means that you need to press ctrl/refresh a few times to clear out crap between you and this server. Sucks, huh? Only affects the chosen few, though. :-*
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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