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sparks
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Toe is in the water |
Registered: January 1970
Messages: 57
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THIS Spot is a wonderful place to come to,I can read good stories and can well see how such diversity is a good thing.I have to be very careful what I say,simply because it is bad form to offend anyone and I do not want to do that.I am very saddened by some of the comments made by the last poster,They seem unfair and unwarrented.Right now perhaps it is vouge to badmouth America with her many faults.But to forbid other,perhaps unrelated,comments on a particular thread just because its *their sandbox* to me does not speak well for the spitit of this place.The free diversity of discussion lends information to all.It would seem that some small divirgance from the posted topic might well be considered,after all,we all have good things to say.I would hope that this *sandbox* belongs to us all and that no one toss out a player even if one wants to talk about tennis and the rest want to talk football. respectfully sparks
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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There was once a Frenchman, M Chauvin. He supported Napoleon, as a patriot. His emperor could do no wrong.
Ideas should be challenged. That is for here.
Nations should be challenged. And supported. But not here, I think.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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We all share the same sandbox, it's not exclusively mine or anyone else's. It is big enough to fit all our views without having to build our castles on top of someone else's.
I'm sure you would not have started to talk about basketball in Sammy's well-wishes-thread for example. It's the same thing here. It won't kill you sticking to the topic, nor will it limit your freedom of expression. Just express yourself in another thread, that's all.
Starting up unrelated discussions in a thread detracts from what the thread actually is about, and I know it's not just me who finds that annoying.
"But he that hath the steerage of my course,
direct my sail."
-William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, Act One, Scene IV
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sparks
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Toe is in the water |
Registered: January 1970
Messages: 57
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From observation,this forum thrives on interaction between ALL the various players.Sometimes a topic or thread rings a bell or brings to light something a bit off topic in that particular thread.I believe in the spirit of this forum that really nothing is carved in granit or stone,that some diversion,and TOLORANCE for that diversion is crutial to the continued well-being of this forum.No one person can own nor dictate a topic nor its direction.We can only hope that when european ballbearings are being discussed or a voyage to the moon is being discussed,some tolorance should be given to the voyager that just came back from mars,that person offering a bit of his story even if some of that story is about martians and legos and not ballbearings.In short,let zzzzz have his say.Wheres the harm??? I believe the point has been made that some dont like others..Time to grow up guys and get on with life and cut the other guy some slack.Topics threads are going to get mixed and diverted a bit.SO WHAT!!!!!! sparks PS-----Marc--Timmy---Both have my deepest respect
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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I agree with Lenny here. Obviously bits of threads get odd things in them. But a new topic merits a new thread.
I found theme parks interesting, but not in the thread where Lenny was describing his weekend, for example.
I also find that comments are starting to border on the vitriolic. That just is not going to stay that way. Or the comments will not.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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You are of course entitled to agree with whom you choose. That however does not mean that all will agree with your assessment nor does it mean that all will blindly follow. Some will... Some do...
But not all...
Some have minds of their own.
Oh, and I disagree with Lenny here. Mostly beacuse he participated as well as perpetuated the tangent to ammusement parke as much as anyone.
I know I am going against the grain. But that is how I see it.
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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This is getting all too familiar. We are now making a fight out of nothing at all. Only, this time, it isn't going to happen.
Do I really have to start deleting threads and posts again? Just for once let someone else have the last word.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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saben
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On fire! |
Registered: May 2003
Messages: 1537
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As much as I love Lenny, I'm going to have to say respectfully that I mostly agree with Marc here. I think off-topicness should be avoided where possible and where appropriate; especially in sensitive, intellectual or deep topics. However, I don't think Lenny's topic was overly sensitive, more just a funner kind of thing (I know "funner" is not a word  ). I think what makes Marc's point even more valid is that the off-topicness was contributed to by Lenny himself and also the topic had basically run it's course. If Lenny intended to use it as a constant journal or something of the sort I could understand him wanting to keep it "clean" but the stories about he and Nick's adventures had kind of drawn to a conclusion so the off-topicness wasn't really detracting from anything.
I do also think though that Lenny's initial request was quite polite enough that it should really have been heeded. I mean, it doesn't take a whole lot of effort to create a new thread saying "continued from ..." or to take discussion to email. Some of the comments from all sides where a little harsh and really I think it is a small matter to go hurting each other over. Lenny wasn't trying to be controlling or anything like that, just making a simple, polite request that even if you don't agree with doesn't hurt to be comply with. That's my take on things, anyway.
Look at this tree. I cannot make it blossom when it suits me nor make it bear fruit before its time [...] No matter what you do, that seed will grow to be a peach tree. You may wish for an apple or an orange, but you will get a peach.
Master Oogway
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e
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On fire! |
Location: currently So Cal
Registered: May 2002
Messages: 1179
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Quite frequently a thread about one topic can get sidetracked a bit with a related topic. Sometimes it can be appropriate to begin a new thread with that related topic, other times not. In Lenny's thread about his weekend with Nick, the topic of amusement parks was a rather natural progression even if much of it didn't pertain to the one park he and Nick visited. It didn't seem to warrant a new thread, but I can see Lenny's point that he started the thread for a particular discussion and it was getting a bit away from that discussion.
I had no problem with his request to stick to the topic. He asked politely and it's not like he was asking us to leave the board or to halt the discussion. He was only asking to begin a new thread so that his topic would not get sidetracked. I didn't start a new thread because I had no need for further discussion. But if I wanted to discuss it further a new thread was no more than a couple mouse clicks away. No problem.
Think good thoughts,
e
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I think Saben has hit the nail on the head. This is not a discussion about freedom to post a diversity of ideas, or whether ideas should be challenged or not, or about whether Americans are jerks or not.
No. This is a discussion about civility. It's about good manners, and gracious behavior. I know that these are old fashioned concepts which don't seem to have much bearing anymore in today's world, but i think they are important. It would have been good manners to apologize to Lenny and take the discussion concerning amusement parks to a new thread and continued it there. Lenny, on the other hand, could simply have ignored the entire tangential discussion and continued his thread, taking no note of the secondary discussion going on. Either are workable solutions, and both would have avoided any acrimony on anyone's part.
What i have found over years of online communication, is that the lack of body language available to us makes it very hard to judge a speaker's intent, and many comments end up sounding very harsh. I suggest giving everyone the benefit of the doubt--if you aren't sure what someone's intent is in a comment, ask or assume that you're over-reacting.
*steps off his soapbox*
"I promise not to try not to fuck with your mind/ I promise not to mind if you go your way and i go mine/promise not to lie if i'm looking you right in your eye/promise not to try not to let you down."
--Eve6
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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I think the sharpest tip of the point is the fact that Lenny did not object untill the thread had come to an "apparent" standstill.
His objection came about about 2 hours after his final "visit" post.
If there had been a problen he should have said so right from the get go.
Waiting till after everything is all said and done is a bit over the edge I think.
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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