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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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In the UK we have a fad for reality TV shows that show the most appalling parents receiving help from "supernannies" in learning how to raise what appear to be "troublesome children".
Without exception the child is trying to survive in a home that has incompetent, imbecilic or downright insane parents.
It struck me that some of these poor kids must also be embryo litte gay and lesbian adults. And it terrified me that they were in such awful "loving" homes.
The ones we see on TV are the tip of the iceberg and are "entertaining". I doubt other appalling parents can even see themselves in the examples we are shown. So how do the rest of the kids cope? And how especially do the embryo "different" kids cope?
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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The kids cope in just the same way we coped in our own youth.
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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I'm not sure that kids from such an environment are necessarily any worse off than those from apparently nice middle-class families where one of the parents is in fact emotionally and physically abusive. The 'supernanny' kids may learn the benefits of having some emotional control, or may not ... I don't know anyone who's had that kind of upbringing.
But I do know (as well as myself) a number of survivors of emotional, physical and sexual abuse, and we're all characterised by (or are working on overcoming) an extreme difficulty forming trusting,loving relationships.
Actually, I wish that *I'd* had the confidence to tell my father to "f*ck off" at the age of four, when he first started to call me 'useless' and 'unmanly'. Or the physical strength to resist when he thumped me....
But then, most kids grow up decent in spite of their parents, not because of them!
"The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral, begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy. ... Returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night devoid of stars." Martin Luther King
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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> But then, most kids grow up decent in spite of their parents, not because of them!
You are soooooooooo right there!!!!!!!!!!!
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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