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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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Considering the hostile environment of my school experience why did I ever open the door to those that did come by?
I never really thought about it before...... I really despised most of them.
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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That very bleak question covers so many things.
I think you were searching. He might have been among them. He may even have been among them but you, like me, could not see him.
You might have been proving that you could control them though they thought they controlled you.
You certainly proved that you were outwardly unafraid.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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When I had to be out of my room I was mostly terrified of physical reprisal. I, for the most part tried my best to be nondescript at best while in the public areas.
It seldom worked......
In my room however I knew exactly why they knocked. I knew exactly what they wanted from me.
When I think about it I can not be sure if I opened the door for the sex or in the hopes of a stay of execution.........
Oh my..... this is rether unsettling.....
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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maybe the feeling of it being unsettling is timely. I know when I face my own emotional awkwardnesses I can resolve them. I suspect you are not so very different from me.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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