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You are here: Home > Forum > A Place of Safety > General Talk > Actually I do have something to say today
Actually I do have something to say today  [message #29310] Mon, 13 March 2006 19:21 Go to next message
thirdfencepost is currently offline  thirdfencepost

Really getting into it
Location: NJ
Registered: May 2003
Messages: 724



Originally I was just going to respond to timmy and slunk away into the darkness some more and watch but I do have something for yall.

Now then, one of my friends has had a whole slew of crappy relationships. Shes's one of the few girls from HS i still talk to and a fairly nice person though has a tendency to be clingy, (don't we all).

Anyway shes dated a billion people. well I am sure not that many actually probably 4 or 5 guys that I can recall. Perhaps three of them have been 'serious' relationships (even though everything is serious to a teenager). Anyway, her relationships always end the same.

2 weeks in I love him, he 's amazing I love him, 3 months in- we've been fighting a little recently i don't like it very much I love him. 5 months in we made these plans were engaged, were going to get married next year, going on a cruise, blah blah blah. Anyway 6-7 months we broke up I want him back.

It's like a bad tv soap opera. Everytime I talk to her it plays the same roll. I dont mind it at least your never caught off guard but still. She's always caught off guard.

Dear I think i've forgotten my point... But I suppse my question is are some people destined to be in crappy relationships and think they are in love when there not?

I think that was my point, if that wasn't my point then by all means reply to what my point should have been



Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?
Re: Actually I do have something to say today  [message #29312 is a reply to message #29310] Mon, 13 March 2006 20:18 Go to previous messageGo to next message
timmy

Has no life at all
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796



I think some people manage to sabotage relationships, "just in case"



Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
I think Timmy's probably right.  [message #29320 is a reply to message #29310] Tue, 14 March 2006 00:51 Go to previous messageGo to next message
cossie is currently offline  cossie

On fire!
Location: Exiled in North East Engl...
Registered: July 2003
Messages: 1699



We're looking at four or five relationships, all following the same pattern and pretty much the same timetable. You've got to look for a common factor, and the only common factor is your friend.

You say she's clingy. Clinginess often goes with possessiveness, and that's often the cause of break-ups. I'd guess that your friend may be basically insecure, and this might account for her failure rate. As Timmy says, some people seem to have an unconscious tendency to sabotage relationships simply because they can't convince themselves that they will survive in the long term.

I hope your friend has better luck in the future, but I think it might be good for her to talk things through with someone she trusts, but who wouldn't automatically agree with everything she says.



For a' that an' a' that,
It's comin' yet for a' that,
That man tae man, the worrld o'er
Shall brithers be, for a' that.
Re: Actually I do have something to say today  [message #29326 is a reply to message #29310] Tue, 14 March 2006 02:25 Go to previous message
marc is currently offline  marc

Needs to get a life!

Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729



She seems to be in love with the idea of being in love.......

Unfortunately, it takes more of a mutual committment for a relationship to blossom..... Her boy friends may be going along with her romantic notions but I would hazzard to guess they do so to gain something from her..... Once they get what they want they decide to move on to greener pastures.



Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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