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I am going to make this my last post at least for a long while if not permanently. I just don’t have the skills needed to communicate effectively in this medium. I don’t know that I should have ever come back. The last thread I posted was simple really despite the verbiage. : P and is just a reaffirmation of my reluctance, misgivings about a return.
So if you will, come to this place for the warmth and comfort it offers. Be real, no one needs prove anything about them selves, be at peace with how and who others are. No matter how right we think we are for our selves, you will never be that for others. For the most part I don’t think any one is particularly evil here. In truth though, you may find that it is only occasionally that you find people you truly like and bond with to the extent any place like this can facilitate. This world, society, already judges us pretty harshly. So with the one thing we do share in common, should we not be just that more empathetic, not that this is not shown in a greater degree here. Still each of us will find what we seek, discord or harmony. It’s up to each and every one of us.
Lastly, I did want to try and make amends for any offence or harm I may have caused. I am not trying to get back into anyone’s good graces, I make no excuses. I apologize from the depths of my heart. Needless to say though, I, at times am exceedingly stupid. LOL though I hold no patent there. Also I clam the last three verses of the song I posted, : ) still no excuses. In the end we do have to take responsibility, even if they are just words they carry great weight in the effect they cause.
If you will Timmy, when and if you have occasion to talk to Jon, tell him the times I spent with him on line were some of the most edifying, at least for the greater part. I don’t think he would even read any mail I would send, so please pass this along if you can. This is one I lost in the worst and most undeserving way for him, and no end of regret for me. I will still probably never rekindle relationships I have had on line; I just ended that one in the worst way. Here again my pen fails me.
Another one from Joni, “We are all captives on the carousel of time, we can’t return, we can only look behind from where we came”! The good the bad and the ugly, come to terms with it and hopefully learn from it.
This is not a post of sadness but of hope for all of us. I wish all of you here the best, as I seek the same for myself.
Be seeing you
Peace
People will tell you where they've gone
They'll tell you where to go
But till you get there yourself you never really know
Where some have found their paradise
Other's just come to harm
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13802
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I think you are apologising for things that only you have seen.
If it is that you are concerned that replies were small in number, please do not be. Simply realise that maybe you said all that was needed. Or that something else claimed people's attention.
Just post what you feel, when you feel. Never be concerned about the lack of replies or a huge number of replies. Just know that someone, somewhere, has read what you said and they just might now feel not so alone. Most people on this board do not post ever. Most just read. And the board is FOR them created BY us all.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Arich - Whether you choose to post here frequently, infrequently, or never again, please know that I have enjoyed your posts and wish you well.
"The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral, begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy. ... Returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night devoid of stars." Martin Luther King
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Dear arich,
Well, there are a couple of possible reasons why you might not have been getting many replies.
First is relevance. I'm from the UK, and I don't know who Bill Maher is; I have never even seen the Larry King show. I don't have a great knowledge of American politics, and while I would be inclined to agree that there is probably a great deal of hypocrisy in the Republican Party, I don't know enough about it to make a constructive contribution to that thread. The majority of people here are not from America and they may well feel the same.
The second is subject. Your posts are so long and you change subject so much that it's not always clear what you want us to respond to! Perhaps you could restrict your initial post to a couple of short paragraphs detailing the matter at hand, and then open the discussion to anyone who wants to join in? Then wait a while and only later post your own opinions in reply. This not only makes the discussion's scope clearer, but if you post too much at once then people will feel there is not much left that is both specific enough and has not yet been said.
I don't know if anything else has happened of which I have not been aware, but you certainly haven't offended me; and I'm not sure how you could have offended anyone. It has been nice to have you here. I'm sorry to hear you're leaving.
David
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Aussie
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Really getting into it |
Registered: August 2006
Messages: 475
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Sorry to hear you may leave us, I have always found your posts to be interesting and your ability to effectively communicate on this board seems fine to me. I also believe you make some worthwhile contributions.
So please do come back and post from time to time even if only occasionally.
Best wishes
Aussie
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cossie
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On fire! |
Location: Exiled in North East Engl...
Registered: July 2003
Messages: 1699
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First of all, I can't imagine why you feel the need to apologise; your contributions have been both thoughtful and useful in our discussions.
In another time and place, I was made to feel as though I intimidated other posters. I would never intentionally do so; though I came from a working-class background, I had the advantage of an excellent education - wholly state funded, as without such funding it would have been beyond my reach. It would be surprising if that education were not reflected in the language I use. So, in response to the suggestion that I thought myself better than anyone else, my answer was - and is - that I may be luckier, but I have never claimed to be better. So I hope that I didn't contribute to your discomfort.
But as regards the last thread you started, I would certainly have contributed; I try to contribute to every thread unless I know nothing whatsoever about the topic, and I've never let three thousand miles of water deter me from commenting about things American! The reason I didn't contribute this time is mundane in the extreme - my sound card is misbehaving. I expect a replacement within the next few days, but in the meantime my lip-reading talents weren't up to the task of understanding your link!
Arich, I really would appreciate it if you would e-mail me so that we could talk some more. I know that I could e-mail you, but I don't want to be pushy - the choice is yours. If you leave, I'll be very sorry, and I know that others share that opinion.
For a' that an' a' that,
It's comin' yet for a' that,
That man tae man, the worrld o'er
Shall brithers be, for a' that.
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Dear Arich,
Please stay. But if you do choose to leave I wish you all the best, wherever you are, whatever you do!
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I want to thank all of you for your kind comments and advise. I’ll take it! As for the apologies, well, I was intentionally not very clear, only to those that I have had contact with on an individual bases will understand in their own way, Marc is one, Jon another, Marc you all know, few of you know Jon, and there are others. As for Marc, he and I are like oil and water he knows this, we have not talked in many years but it may surprise him that I still think of him and I really do care for and about him. You all know he has, when he is not plagued by his own problems the biggest heart in the world, he has held me in his arms and cried, the love in his heart palpable. I not only wanted to apologize to him but in my own way say it’s time to let the healing begin not only with him but all of us. Jon is another matter all together I love him with all my heart the, English word love is not descriptive enough, if I only had a handle on Greek LOL, what is 185 derivations and uses of a word we toss around so blithely. In my ineptness if I didn’t hurt him, I hurt myself. In the words I wrote so inefficiently.
As to limiting contact with the net, LOL that is a long story about me and two elder medicine women I know in New Mexico. While there a couple of years ago they gave me some very good advise on using what I have within to help deal with my illness. LOL, again this is one of those things that can cause needless fire storms hehehe, this stuff does make me chuckle though, like fire walking. You see I don’t believe in the supernatural, as cossie has said there is only that natural that we do not have a handle on. There is more within and without, that we don’t fully understand and there is need to take great care and thought in what we do, and just as much if not more in this medium, what and how we say things, words are very powerful. It’s been said here before, words are like dropping a rock in a pond, that, with out having the ques we have when face to face can make it doubly so in their eventual effects.
LOL again forgive my verbal histrionics, there in lies my problem as far as lack of skills go. In person I think you would see the humor in much of what I say, I just don’t have the skills to convey that in this medium. I will keep trying for the time being, though I already see by the effect of what I have not been able to convey, that I have not come very far in my desire to improve.
Peace
People will tell you where they've gone
They'll tell you where to go
But till you get there yourself you never really know
Where some have found their paradise
Other's just come to harm
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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Rich,
I think of you often as well. You know I accept your appology and I offer mine also.
On the rare occasions when you have posted I so wanted to reply personally but I was terorfied (sp) I would upset you.
You have made me so happy today. I feel a glow in me that reaches to the very core of my being.
Please do not leave us here.....
I do not beg many things from many people but this I beg of you.....
With love my brother,
Marc
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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Aussie
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Really getting into it |
Registered: August 2006
Messages: 475
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It's great to see some long overdue healings taking place on this MB after the events of the last few days.
Perhaps we can now return to talking trust and unconditional support from everyone to everyone here and maybe we can get back some of the posters who haven't been game to pop their head up recently.
With a healing hug to all
Aussie
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No marc, I won’t leave, I never have. I think though that many of us know that there are things more powerful than words.
I was told by those beautiful wise women in New Mexico that although that thing we call Eros love may be limited to the point of almost non existent for me, that I need to channel that energy into all the other forms of love. That part of what I am becoming will always be here if not my words. Still, as I said I will try and stay, with these feeble words, as long as I see that there effects are toward the positive, hehehe well, as much as possible, we all being works in progress can’t help but be imperfect, I’ll cop to that. : )
If I may go on a bit and leave you all with a thought to ponder and comment on, all the things we go through in life that are a source of pain and hurt are if you will seeds, well, lets just say life is a garden, and we the gardeners. It being up to each of us and how we tend it, which will determine whether the fruit it bears is beautiful succulent and refreshing, or bitter and coarse.
Forgive if this seems all too esoteric, in truth I am all inclusive. LOL I really do talk this way for the most part, at least in the company of friends. This in its way for the people I know, if you will in R/L is how I make them smile. For me it is an expression of the feeling I have when the free fall off the high point of a rollercoaster comes, : ) the unbearable lightness of being.
And Marc, Huge Huggs Kevy too
Peace
People will tell you where they've gone
They'll tell you where to go
But till you get there yourself you never really know
Where some have found their paradise
Other's just come to harm
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