|
|
|
|
Hi,
I've been off the forum for some weeks now.
Early the last week of November, my only child was diagnosed with a particularly virulent form of untreatable cancer. Terminal we were told. Unless you have experienced this yourself, you can only imagine the heartache and pain.
It finally came out day before yesterday that the original diagnosis was incorrect. That only happened because of a required appointment outside the medical facility which originated the misdiagnosis. It was then we discovered there are 2 patients treated by that medical practice who have the same first, middle initial, and last names, my child being one of them. It was the other patient who, unfortunately, is terminal.
I have to tell you, as a father I have been through hell the last few weeks. Haven't done much of anything except go to work and come home and die every day.
Frankly, I don't understand how something this serious can carry on for this many days. What happened to all the checks and double checks, etc. that should have been in place to prevent this kind of thing. I've informed them that they are being reported to the proper governing board as of tomorrow (Monday) AM. I refuse to take any other legal action. I simply want to leave this episode behind.
I'd urge each of you to be proactive with your healthcare. Not only in regards to your own health, but in regards to office procedures and practices. Demand to see your medical records on a regular basis to verify the validity of every entry contained therein. Question lab results and practices, and always demand a second opinion or more from another practicioner/s.
Anyhow, that is what's been going on in my life. I'm looking for some happy things to look at and think about. Anybody got some of that?
Teddy
“There's no grays, only white that's got grubby. I'm surprised you don't know that. And sin, young man, is when you treat people as things. Including yourself. That's what sin is.” - Terry Pratchett
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Teddy,
You have all my sympathy -- that is a terrible, terrible thing to happen. I hope that the misdiagnosis did not lead to unnecessary (and especially irreversible) treatment.
I can't imagine how such a stupid mistake as that was made, but I hope that there is a proper investigation and that whoever is responsible is able to ensure that it never happens again.
At the moment I'm feeling too tired to find some happy things at the moment (I've had about 5 hours of sleep since Friday), but hopefully someone else will be able to. 
Best wishes,
David
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
timmy
|
 |
Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
|
|
|
All I can do is to offer you and your family a hug. The ludicrously hard thing is that you are now grieving for the grief. It will pass, but dammit...... that is hard.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
marc
|
 |
Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
|
|
|
I'm sorry....
For you, your family and what you all had to endure.....
And I am sorry for the other person with the same name.....
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Teddy...............
Firstly WOW!!!
Secondly OMFG!!
I cannot imagine the worry, pain, relief, and anger. You’ve gone through these last few weeks.
I see you don’t want compensation. I can see why, as you say to put this awful time to bed.
But that still does not answer the question the cost of medical bills you’ve had to endure.
Maybe the money could be used to fund a holiday, or your child’s education in the future or even have gone to some charity, I mean compensation would be from the medical centres insurance not from the practice owners own pocket….
It could have been a whole lot worse had you precious child been given treatment detrimental to his/her life.
Maybe the money could be donated to the family of the child who’s also gone through the mill I mean the child who was given the all clear and then had it’s life snatched away so cruelly twice by been given the all clear and then finding out that.
My ultimate thoughts got to both set of children and their family and friend teddy your in our families thoughts as are all members new and old….
Jay, I love u. You are my heart and my soul.
You are my other half. The final piece to my puzzle. I am complete when I am with you.
You turn a dark day into a bright sunny day.
You make me giddy with joy.Just from hearing your voice.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
timmy
|
|
Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
|
|
|
Isn't it odd that, just when you want to quote one, it deserts you?
I think the real happy thing is just being able to breathe again. That beats a whole basket of kittens
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Teddy,
As a parent myself I can easily envisage what you've been through! I'm glad that your child is ok. But mistakes like this shouldn't happen.
My thoughts are also with the other child and its parents.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
ProfZodiac
|
 |
Likes it here |
Location: United States
Registered: August 2006
Messages: 115
|
|
|
The happiest thing I know is the comfort that within a couple short weeks, we all (well, the vast majority anyway) will be gathering together with friends and family and celebrating Christmas. I say this not specifically meaning the event of a Christmas Eve or Christmas Day party, but the process of readying for Christmas. There's so much in the coming weeks that brings me joy, and I hope that some of it might be helpful to you as well.
-Singing Christmas carols without getting funny looks on the street. (I'm as liable to sing 'O Holy Night' in July as I am in December.)
-Going to the mall and thinking carefully in the bookstore of which Calvin and Hobbes collection my brother would enjoy the most. And then buying it for myself and getting him a CD or something.
-Sifting through Amazon.com and looking at my friends' and family members' Wish Lists, and then promptly ignoring them. I like giving gifts that they didn't pick out; I feel that the spirit is more genuine that way.
-Walking around campus in the cold air. I can't stand being cold, but I find guys in hoodies very attractive, and we're certainly in hoodie weather.
-Adding peppermint schnapps to my hot chocolate as I write a paper for a class that's recently ended.
-Thinking about packing up my belongings so that I can move them from my dorm to my off-campus apartment, where I won't be responsible to the school's regulations any longer. (And will finally have a bedroom to myself. Damn you, snoring roommate!)
-Selling back my textbooks to get money that I'm promptly going to spend on other people.
-Popping those little pieces of chocolate out of the Advent calendar. Cheating and having chocolate pieces three days in advance.
-Watching my favorite Christmas specials on TV.
The list goes on. This month, despite the cold, the threat of snow, and the spectre of final exams, has so much potential. Immerse yourself in the holiday spirit.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Teddy,
I am so sorry that you and your family had to go through this ordeal. What an agonizing time it was for you. And, of course, I am delighted with the eventual outcome. I don't know how old your child is and how much of all this your child was aware of, but professional help may be a good idea. Only you will know.
One thought you sad/happy story did provoke in me: in countries where everyone has an ID number such an egregious error would be infinitely less likely to occur.
All's well that ends well. May you and your family be blessed with health and contentment for many years to come.
J F R
The paradox has often been noted that the United States, founded in secularism, is now the most religiose country in Christendom, while England, with an established church headed by its constitutional monarch, is among the least. (Richard Dawkins, 2006)
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
jack
|
|
Likes it here |
Location: England
Registered: September 2006
Messages: 304
|
|
|
it must have been hell for all involved,
But also hell for the other family to find out that their child has a terminal illness.
This is why we should enjoy now!
life is to enjoy.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Thanks so much for all the thoughts, Guys.
I should clarify my original post to say that the diagnosis was never completely comfirmed. The clerical error was discovered when we were sent for a confirming diagnostic procedure at another medical facility and that facility checked the social security number against the one in the medical file and discovered the problem at that point. No invasive procedures or treatments were administered, and there was very little expense incurred by this experience because medical insurance covered most.
The problem started in the first place when both patients had routine lab work done during the same week.
All in all we came out frazzled around the edges but intact. We are now settling down to enjoy this Christmas season like we've enjoyed no other!
Adam, I loved your descriptions of happy Christmas things. Thanks.
Teddy
“There's no grays, only white that's got grubby. I'm surprised you don't know that. And sin, young man, is when you treat people as things. Including yourself. That's what sin is.” - Terry Pratchett
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
timmy
|
|
Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
|
|
|
You know, if you choose, and if you do not want any compensation for yourselves, I have a suggestion which you might consider.
The medical facility was careless and culpable and should still be brought to account. How fitting if a substantial sum were fixed and this were to be donated to your local children's hospice?
In that way the harm that came out of this could be turned to direct good use.
I am not sure you ever said the age of your child. Not that it matters at all. Mine is rising 22 and still my baby boy, despite being taller tham me and likely to out earn me within about 20 minutes!
Nor have you said if they are fit and well.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Teddy, you of course in time will get over this and it will be but a bad memory.
Is there any way of conveying our condolences to the parents of the other poor child? Apart from being a terrible shock to them, why does it always happen at this, the worst time of year, just when a family gathering should be a happy one? :'-(
Mike.g
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Mike,
There is no way I know of due to the HEPA(sp) laws here in the US. I've already made inquirey into trying to contact them. Absolute dead end. Fact of the matter is the medical facility will not even speak to me and have requested me to take my business elsewhere.
Timmy,
Excellent idea. I'm going to contact a lawyer this week to see what we can do to get some kind of settlement out of them. This may not even have to go to court in order to accomplish the desired result and if I get the right lawyer, perhaps it may not even cost, as his fees could in essence be a donation to the hospice as well.
Teddy
“There's no grays, only white that's got grubby. I'm surprised you don't know that. And sin, young man, is when you treat people as things. Including yourself. That's what sin is.” - Terry Pratchett
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
timmy
|
|
Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
|
|
|
HIPAA: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HIPAA
The Medical Facility cannot continue to treat you or offer you any services. They know that you will be taking action against them and they must now ask you to take your business elsewhere. Anything else will prejudice their defence and your case
I imagine the other family is an essential witness. A lawyer can find them when you cannot. One has to hope that they received the correct treatment despite being a typing error.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Timmy,
To answer a couple of your other questions, this child of mine will be graduating university in June and ready to take the world by the tail! I don't think this episode could have hurt any worse if the age had been 5. You are so right. Still my baby.
I regards health. Said offspring is doing well and has been seeing the campus mental health counselors since this episode began.
I'm soooo looking forward to the Christmas holiday this year!
“There's no grays, only white that's got grubby. I'm surprised you don't know that. And sin, young man, is when you treat people as things. Including yourself. That's what sin is.” - Terry Pratchett
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Teddy,
I haven't had much of a chance to talk to you here, but when I read your initial post here about your child, I was personally floored. Those who know me here know that about a year ago, I lost someone who was basically a son to me. Also to cancer, or rather to the effects of cancer. He was a member of this forum as well. So I know a fraction of the anguish that you have been through. Sam was a fighter and that is the key to survival. I totally sympathize with you, man. That is the sort of thing that would make me very angry as well. I have the best of hopes for your child, and I hope that this thing is easily dealt with, medically.
Cya on the other side, D'Artagnon, aka, Robby
It's not the wolf you see you should fear, but all the ones he howls with. Don't be afraid of the song, but don't piss off the choir.
|
|
|
|
|
Goto Forum:
|
] 
A Place of Safety
Search
Help
Register
Login
Home
Re: An unfortunate series of events 
