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I have posted on these forums once before... and only one time a long time ago. I have come back, under this assumed identity, for what reason I am not sure. But I do believe I wouldn't be posting this right now if there wasn't some reason for it. What do you think?
I live my life one day at a time; each moment is precious so cherish the time that you have.
Cyrus Storm
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Why not just say what's on your mind?
The paradox has often been noted that the United States, founded in secularism, is now the most religiose country in Christendom, while England, with an established church headed by its constitutional monarch, is among the least. (Richard Dawkins, 2006)
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Because.... while it's still on my mind, I can dismiss it or throw it out or supress it or whatever I choose. However, once I've put it in words that are tangable, I can't take it back.
I live my life one day at a time; each moment is precious so cherish the time that you have.
Cyrus Storm
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that is the point of your assumed identity? You won't need to take the words back because you haven't said them.
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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Most people come and post because they are gathering the courage to say something. Breaking the ice is always a good thing to do, as you did before in whatever identity you chose then.
When you are comfortable you will say what you need, ask what you need, and receive good and bad answers 
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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Ah, but saying some words makes them real. You say them and they affect you, the speaker, not the listener.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Like Timmy said, when your ready you will tell us what it is you need to. You wont be judged ever. If you ask we can give advice good or bad. What you take away from hear with you is what you choose.
If you stand for Freedom, but you wont stand for war, then you dont stand for anything worth fighting for.
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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Cyrus Storm wrote:
> Because.... while it's still on my mind, I can dismiss it or throw it out or supress it or whatever I choose. However, once I've put it in words that are tangable, I can't take it back.
These thoughts are in your mind and that makes them as real as if anywhere.
The thing is that as long as you keep these thoughts to yourself there will be no discourse, no advise, no way to help other than reciting meaningless platitudes that do nothing to make anyone feel any better.
Once it is said or written down these thoughts are no longer yet still yours. When itterated they become a part of the greater whole and only then can anyone step up to give advice.
Until then it is all just a game of hide and seek.
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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I feel that before I begin, it is necessesary to tell you a little bit about how I came to know the one I love. Everything contained here in is true.
It was 2004, about 3 weeks before I started my Senior year in High School. I had been involved in an online roleplay with a good friend of mine, a female, and in the roleplay we were lovers. I will admit, in my life I have made some mistakes. But the biggest mistake was loosing myself inside a fictional character, however briefly, it brought the roleplay to a stop instantly and I lost a friend online. Normally that wouldn't be a big deal, but as I stated previously, I had lost myself in a character and became confused to where in character talk started and stopped.
I was sulking in my own self enduced sorrow when I met a boy online. It's not important who he is at the moment, but it is important that he brought me out of my sorrow and we fell in love. At that time, I started to seriously entertain thoughts about him and about being with him in real life. He had the same thoughts towards me, so it was no big deal in that respect and we had a wonderful long distance relationship for a little more than a year. He died in 2005 and I was heartbroken, I had never got to visit him in real life. I didn't know what I was going to do but I sought help and the very rational boy, who knew my deceased love, fell in love with me and I with him. Unfortunatley, though, it is a long distance relationship... and I have visited him once at his house, last summer. Now, though, it has been almost a year since I saw him and our phone conversations have become somewhat less then what they were; they don't seem as exciting.
We have less time for eachother, and we're filled with an unsatisfiable desire to be togeather- to physically touch. It seems as though we've just talked about everything there is to talk about. I get unreasonably worried that he's seeing someone else, even though I don't have any proof. Is that normal?
[Updated on: Thu, 17 May 2007 07:49]
I live my life one day at a time; each moment is precious so cherish the time that you have.
Cyrus Storm
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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Yup, looks like the party is over.
I would begin looking for either someone closer or no one at all.
Long distance relationships have little chance of success and even less chance of lasting.
So to answer your question.....
Yes, it is normal.
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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It seems to me that you need to meet him, properly, for a decent time period, and get to know him. Not his body, but him, the things he loves and hates, hopes and fears.
Once you know each other, then you will know what to do for sure
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Marc wrote:
> Yup, looks like the party is over.
>
> I would begin looking for either someone closer or no one at all.
>
> Long distance relationships have little chance of success and even less chance of lasting.
>
> So to answer your question.....
>
> Yes, it is normal.
I really don't mean to sound like an asshole, but I didn't ask what you would do and far too many people have told me that long distance relationships have little chance of lasting.
Distance is, undoubtedly, an obstacle; but one that can be overcome. I don't know about anybody else, but as for my partner and me, we intend to overcome that distance. Soon we will be togeather and things will be decided on from there.
[Updated on: Fri, 18 May 2007 04:06]
I live my life one day at a time; each moment is precious so cherish the time that you have.
Cyrus Storm
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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Oh, sorry,
What I meant to say was that relationships have little chance of success. And that is in a face to face, hands on relationship.
There are rare occasions when one will endure the test of time and yours might indeed be the exception but for the fact that you already feel he is stepping out on you.
That being the case, it is just a matter of time till the end.
[Updated on: Fri, 18 May 2007 07:03]
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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Well, that may be, but as I said before it's just unfounded paranoia. The way I see it, unless I get some information that can confirm my stupid paranoia then there's no reason to end a good thing.
I live my life one day at a time; each moment is precious so cherish the time that you have.
Cyrus Storm
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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Did I ever say that you should end anything?
No.....
But paranoia is only the first step to mistrust, doubt and accusations.
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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saben
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On fire! |
Registered: May 2003
Messages: 1537
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Trust your instinct, it may just be paranoia, but probably not. It is easy to "cheat" on someone when your relationship is restricted to being online. Don't mean to sound depressive, I've just seen it all too often.
I met my current boyfriend online, and we've been together 2 years, but it was never long distance. Long distance relationships aren't just geographically distanced, they are emotionally so, too. I know the difference.
Look at this tree. I cannot make it blossom when it suits me nor make it bear fruit before its time [...] No matter what you do, that seed will grow to be a peach tree. You may wish for an apple or an orange, but you will get a peach.
Master Oogway
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marc
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Needs to get a life! |
Registered: March 2003
Messages: 4729
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Ok..... boiling it down to the last drip of essence.....
You have to get past this doubt....
As much as you would adore that he sit at the edge of his chair and await your chimming him into a chat you have to come to terms with the stone cold fact that he (as everyone should) has a life away from the internet.
If you want to make this real... Pack up... Move there...
Or him to you...
Otherwise.... the enevitable will assuredly happen.
That is the best advice I can offer.
Marc
Life is great for me... Most of the time... But then I meet people online... Very few are real friends... Many say they are but know nothing of what it means... Some say they are, but are so shallow...
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