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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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I was Wikipedia surfing, and I discovered someone I was at school with died on Sunday at 58. His obit was just added to my old school alumni list. I suppose 58 is a good age when you are 18, but not when you are 55.
He wasn't an endearing personality at school, but, out of the blue five years ago or so, he invited me to lunch. He'd turned into a fun person. We lost touch again, but I feel sad, nonetheless.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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That is a definite bummer. It brings you too close to an awareness of your own mortality. I don't read the old hometown newspaper so that I won't be tempted to read the obituaries. Most of my childhood friends lived life to the fullest and will likely be dropping like flies soon due to poor maintenance. It isn't the sort of race I care to win!
Youth crisis hot-line 866-488-7386, 24 hr (U.S.A.)
There are people who want to help you cope with being you.
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Four or five years ago I got nostalgic and tried to get in contact with old school friends, lovers and acquaintances.
It was not a success. I got two good meals out of it; one from a hetero friend who really tried to be nice and also to impress with his splendid house and trophy wife but that just put me off; an ex-lover fed me well, was nice but his wife was so jealous that we could not be left alone together!! (he has since died); another friend would not see me again (I fancy he lusted after me once - maybe even loved me). Two of my university friends have died of aids. I'm still in touch with about a dozen university friends (two couples each lost a child to suicide - a very severe blow). And, of course many have died from natural causes, including my younger brother.
At 72 perhaps I'm beginning to accept those facts of life that I can't change.
Anthony
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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I find, when I do contact them, that I email them, they email back with what appears to be an enthusiastic "how are you, we must meet", and I email a chatty "yes we must " (not even suggesting a date) with news like theirs back to them.
At that point silence descends.
I emailed a third time to one, asking him precisely what kind of a shit he had thought I was at school (I never quite liked him enough to care either way about a reaction), and explained the 3 email thing. He did reply. The reply was unexceptional, but unencouraging.
Then the alumnus who used to be my school physics lab partner advertised on the alumni site for "anyone who knew me to get in touch, for a meal or a drink or a chat". We got on well enough so I tried it. Remarkably rude "fuck off" reply there!
Nostalgia is not what it used to be!
But it's hard to find your old colleagues dying. That's what made it an odd evening.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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