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A friend of mine sent me this, and I thought some of you might like to see it, too.
Breakfast at the White House
Dick Cheney and George W. Bush are having breakfast at the White House.
The attractive waitress asks Cheney what he would like, and he replies, “'I'd like a bowl of oatmeal and some fruit.”
And what can I get for you, Mr. President?”
George W. looks up from his menu and replies with his trademark wink and
slight grin, “How about a quickie this morning?”
“Why, Mr. President!” the waitress exclaims, “How rude! You're starting to act like President Clinton!”, and she storms away.
Cheney leans over to Bush and whispers, “It's pronounced 'quiche'”
We do not remember days...we remember moments.
Cesare Pavese
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WASHINGTON, D.C. (AP)
White House officials confirmed today that President Bush's library has been utterly destroyed. A leak in the private bathroom on the second floor of the White House, where the books were kept, caused severe water damage and both books were destroyed. The President is described as being distraught since he had almost finished coloring the second volume.
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Thanks for that report, Whitewaterkid. I guess we could therefore assume that the other book was "My Pet Goat" (although I've always suspected that book really stretched the limitations of Bush's level of comprehension to the extreme breaking point).
We do not remember days...we remember moments.
Cesare Pavese
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Four boys were fishing. As their boat rounded a point on the lake, they saw a man thrashing in the water.
With no hesitation, they jumped into the water and saved him. It was not until they pulled him to shore that they noticed the man they had saved was President George Bush, who had slipped away from the Secret Service for a swim.
When President Bush caught his breath, he thanked the boys and offered them anything they wanted in return for saving his life.
The first boy thought about it for a while and finally answered. "I would like a presidential appointment to West Point so I can serve my country."
The next two thought that was a great idea, but one said he had always wanted to be a pilot so he would rather attend the Air Force Academy.
The third boy chose the Naval Academy.
The president turned to the fourth boy, who was still thinking. Finally he answered, "Mr. President, I would like a burial with honors at Arlington National Cemetery".
The president was shocked and asked the boy why he would make such a request at his young age.
The boy replied "Because when my father finds out I saved you, he is going to kill me!"
Youth crisis hot-line 866-488-7386, 24 hr (U.S.A.)
There are people who want to help you cope with being you.
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Youth crisis hot-line 866-488-7386, 24 hr (U.S.A.)
There are people who want to help you cope with being you.
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Saving Bush 
Hair in his teeth? 
The more things change, the more they remain the same 
