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Last night, walking from my boyfriends' work we went and took out DVD's to watch and walked to his flat. Just outside the outermost electrified security fence around the security compound in which his flat is, just 5 meters from the gate and just about 20 from the security guard on duty's office, we were robbed at nifepoint by two guys in black running at us(Again...what else is new?) and after they threatened to kill us both and I pepper-sprayed the one they both still managed to steal Jacques' laptop bag with practically his whole life in there. We had walked past at least seven police vans the ten blocks from his restaurant at the centre of campus to his flat, but I have the university private security force on speed-dial and my bf was crying on the ground seconds after, in shock and traumatised, so it took almost 10 seconds before I had managed to pick him up and called the university security on my phone. Grabbed his keys, semi-carried him over my one shoulder and opened the perimiter gates and informed the security guard on duty there about the robbery. I unlocked the gates to his flat, and kinda left him crying there on his bed. When I came back outside about 80 seconds later, the university security force had arrived with two vans and four armed officers. I described the two and the direction they went so the one van emediately roared off. Excelent service and responce time of under two minutes from the event untill the security were in pursuit.
They talked to me for a few seconds and got on the radio, I got Jacques' insurance documents, carried him still crying to the van - before the compound's own security had even really woken up - and they took us straight to the police offices.
Now compare that kind of service to the national police to who'se offices we were taken to start a case then. I was still comforting my bf's hysterical crying, swearing out complaints and giving statements and getting subtle but fu**ing irritating homophobic looks from the police on duty, who blandly, extremely slowly and unhelpfully were filling out a gazillion forms. The University Security Force officers had left us to help tracking the suspects, and my cellphone battery died. It took five hours - till long past midnight - to get the forms filled out. No pharmacies were open for something to calm my bf at that time of night, and apparantly no-one to take us back to his flat. The university security again helped as soon as I called them from the station, sending a lift within minutes and taking us both to his flat so that I could put him to bed, stay up all night guarding him with the lights on and checking in every cupboard whether anyone was hiding in them, waiting to spring out.
He couldn't really sleep, so we worked on his french lesson plan till dawn, when an sms came through on his phone, saying they had found a bag with his ID, classnotes and a bank deposit slip with his telephone number on it. So we called the security force, and they contacted the police, to ammend the case file and talked to the person who found the bag.
This morning, I woke up, having slept with a crying man in my arms, and in uncomfortable jeans, and only THEN does the damn police start thinking about the bag. Its been quite a mess going through all that again, and I feel completely worn out, walking my bf to a friend so he could sleep over there, and not at his flat, making food, calling his parents, calling irritating and unhelpfull insurance companies and everyone in the structure untill I got a senior manager to help me addequately, and organising psyciatric help from the university support centre for him, retrieving notes for his test on monday and trying to regather the most important info on his laptop that was lost.
Fortunately I feel so used to being mugged I'm not even anything more than annoyed at it anymore, and they didn't manage to get anything of mine
He was still shaky this morning when I woke up, and the police were far more annoying than comforting or helpfull through the entire process.
All things considered, I love the private sector, I hate public servants and I am giving new and serious thoughts to emigrating. Canada, anyone?
A truth told with bad intent
Beats all the lies you can invent
-William Blake
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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Canada seems rather chilly.
I fear this is just a hint at what will happen as South Africa heads inexorably towards the nation that Southern Rhodesia became.
I have no possible words of comfort for your boyfriend, simply a suggestion that you and he invest in an automatic backup system for your machines so that the most you lose is a possession
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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It sounds, from the way you describe it, as though this sort of thing is an everyday occurrence. Is it?
I've heard of people being mugged in Bristol (here): one friend had his bike taken from under him so to speak by being threatened with a long and sharp-looking screwdriver.
I wonder why it is that I have never been mugged - nor any of my family. I'm very sorry to hear it and hope Jacques recovers soon and well.
I've only been to Canada once and spent a week in Toronto. I had the impression it was the most civilised place I've ever been. It would be my second choice country after here.
Love,
Anthony
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Macky
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Really getting into it |
Location: USA
Registered: November 2008
Messages: 973
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Dee,
Great shot with the pepper spray! Jacques is one lucky guy to have you around. I envy you your bravery and inner strength. My bf and I were mugged many years ago. The good thing was I missed most of it. One good punch to the jaw and I was down for the count. They didn't get much, but it cost a small fortune to get my teeth fixed. But I think I would rather have that than what Jacques is going through. I wish you both the best.
Behold, how good and how pleasant it is
For brothers to dwell together in unity!
Ps 133:1 NASB
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I am so very, very sorry for you and your boyfriend. I mostly feel for him as he appears to be a very tender hearted, easily hurt person. I imagine it was your concern for him that gave you your rush of adrenaline and strength. He's very lucky to have you.
Canada is very beautiful. The people are beautiful as well. But it's winters can be rather long and severe. It takes being raised in that sort of climate to get used to it.
Youth crisis hot-line 866-488-7386, 24 hr (U.S.A.)
There are people who want to help you cope with being you.
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Dewald, sorry to hear about the mugging. I'd love to go to South Africa and have an open invitation to use a flat in Cape Town free apart from paying the electricity bill, but it is the crime situation that stops me.
Canada is a beautiful country with lovely people. I believe the winters are long and cold, but I know the summers, though short, are warm/hot.
I think one way to prevent muggings is to go around looking as if you've got nothing worth stealing. I rarely have more than £20 on me.
Hugs
Nigel
I dream of boys with big bulges in their trousers,
Never of girls with big bulges in their blouses.
…and look forward to meeting you in Cóito.
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Benji
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Likes it here |
Location: USA
Registered: August 2007
Messages: 297
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Very sorry to hear about this. I'm glad the campus police acted professionally, Shame on your local police. I'm glad to say that I have never been a victim of a crime other then finding my jeep vandalized one morning. May I suggest you invest in a loud whistle, I know that may sound ludicrous. But given the seconds that were availed to you it might have been enough of warning to that guard, or even enough to have made the muggers turn and run the other way. Best to you and your BF, I hope he gets through this as well as yourself.
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Cameron
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Toe is in the water |
Registered: January 2008
Messages: 70
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I'm very sorry this happened to you and your bf. He sounds very sensitive and sweet. He is lucky to have you to lean on.
I know you love your country but I don't know if I could live somewhere with that kind of crime rate. You sound as if you have been mugged many times before. I have been lucky enough to have escaped that kind of violence. I'm not sure I would handle it any better than your bf.
I have only been to Canada once. It is VERY beautiful. The people are very friendly but I'm not qualified to advise you on living there.
There is someone who monitors this board that is. Warren C.E. Austin is a Canadian and a very elegant guy, you probably know him. He could tell you all about Canada and the best gay-friendly areas and anything else you would need to know.
Cameron ;-D
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Sorry to hear to what happened. Hope your boyfriend feels better too. What you did was brave and it shows what type of person you are. Your boyfriend is very lucky to have you.
When i was 16/17 i went through a similar experience. It happened about 6 in the afternoon while i waited to catch the bus. I was talking on the phone, away from other people waiting for the bus, when a guy run towards me, grabbed my phone and got behind me. I looked over and i saw he was pointing a gun at me. He asked me to give him everything i had. Surprisingly, i didn't panic and proceeded to cooperate with his demands. While all this was happening, people were watching and no one did anything. The guy just told them to look away because it was none of their business.
After the guy left, i just sat there not knowing what to do. A guy who witnessed the events just looked at me and said " Sorry for what happened, i hope you are ok." The guy took my keys, my wallent which had $30 in it, and my cellphone. Luckily i had a few coins in my back pocket i used to call my parents. It was only then that tears came to my eyes and realized what had happened. It was a horrible experience.
You don't love someone because they are beautiful, they are beautiful because you love them.
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pipo
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Toe is in the water |
Registered: July 2008
Messages: 35
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I have an uncle and aunt who moved from South Africa to Australia years ago because they felt less secure in SA than before.
I have never been to Canada but have worked with Canadians in Holland. My impression from their stories and from my brother who traveled to Canada several times, is that Canada has a much more gentle and liberal atmosphere than the USA.
I was in Australia twice. The Sydney area is fairly liberal (although nothing much compared to Amsterdam), but many parts of the country have a bit of a redneck attitude and tend to be conservatively Catholic. The "multi-cultural" attitude is a joke and goes only skin-deep for most Aussies.
Still, I think as a South African you would be better off in any of the traditional immigration countries rather than in good old Europe. The Netherlands are for instance very cramped and overpopulated compared to what you're used to. Not so much chance of being mugged but lots of problems related to too many people living too close together. People who return from Canada, Australia or South Africa usually have a hard time adjusting.
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