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Today there was an article in my local paper about a man that was luckily caught getting his end away in a public toilet - romantic stuff like that seems to be all the rage these days. :-/
Anyway the article got me thinking about stuff like gay bars and one night stands, sex toys and why some people say so and so has a huge cock - I mean when did everything become so friggin’ shallow and tacky?
I would personally be content with a kiss and hug and lying in the grass on a warm summer's night with boy of my dreams.
I’d prefer that over taking it in the can from a stranger...which has me thinking that, that probably means I'm gonna end up sad and alone. But It really depresses me, I read the stories on this site written with such passion and heart and then it gets to the point where one of the characters whips it out and starts getting in some late night exercise, that really spoils it for me.
I guess I just want to know am I ever going to get what I have wanted for so damn long or am I going in to this gay thing with the wrong head on? Should I be thinking with my genitalia and not my heart?
 ??
"I love to see a woman with a sawn-off shotgun..."
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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I think you have a somewhat distorted view. Sexual fulfillment happens in all sorts of places. Some people need the frisson of public sex in order to enjoy things at all. Cottaging is one such outlet. Dogging is another.
All you need to understand is that this is not for you.
The "gay scene" is probably not for you either.
But you do need to expose yourself to the risk of happiness by casting your net where fish actually swim. You are entitled to the relationship of your dreams, but it is not going to come knocking on your door.
Open the door. Find places, groups, organisations where like minded people are likely to be having fun and join in.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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I'm totally with you, justa90skid, I want love and affection and the raw sex that I sometimes read about puts me off.
And I think that love and affection are easier to find nowadays than they were when I was young. I encourage you to find them and agree with you that you should not look in shallow places if you want deep relationships.
Places designed to have you 'choose' after one look (because the noise level is so high that talking is impossible) and places where there is huge pressure to act on instant desires such as the Downs or the Heath or the Common. They're not for you or me.
But get out where you can meet new people. Get into groups doing things that you enjoy and you may find you are drawn to someone who enjoys some of the things that you do. Join a social gay group (I'm a member of GayWest). Do evening classes. Try to avoid letting a fortnight go by without meeting and talking to someone new. And, in my opinion, you shouldn't be too demanding. If you insist on perfection or close to that you won't get the experience that may enable you, one day, to find the lasting love you need.
Love,
Anthony
I wish you all the best.
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ray2x
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Really getting into it |
Location: USA
Registered: April 2009
Messages: 430
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It's great that you are in a thinking mode. Sure the sex looks and is fun, and trust me, it isn't fun when you find yourself with the "wrong" person. Being alone is good as well. You're getting your feelings and emotions in touch with the person who matters most: yourself.
Raymundo
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