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This article deserves wide-spread dissemination, with an especial focus on LGBT and Q youth. This is indeed the hope for the younger generations of LGBT that their world can one day be untainted by hatred & despair.
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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I've taken some small snippets and added a very few thoughts here: http://timtrent.blogspot.com/2009/09/coming-out-in-middle-school.html
It's today's new teenagers that may be the ones who will make it safe, at least in the western world, for the generations who follow. The baton is passed firmly to this new generation.
Not that my generation, prior generations or in between generations are in any way complacent. We have each done what little we each can as individuals, and we have more to give, each in his own way.
Like water eroding stone, we will prevail.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Macky
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Really getting into it |
Location: USA
Registered: November 2008
Messages: 973
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I just don't know Timmy. On one level it's wonderful. On another level, I'm concerned for these kids' safety. On another level, I think it's wonderful how society seems to be moving towards it being acceptable for kids to pursue whatever attractions that they feel. On another level, I wonder if this is just another manifestation of the media on behavior; in this case the internet media. And on a real low level, I'm as jealous as hell that I did not have the same opportunities as these middle schoolers have today.
Behold, how good and how pleasant it is
For brothers to dwell together in unity!
Ps 133:1 NASB
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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Our generation, not necessarily ourselves, but our generation, has made it possible for the kids in the article to be who they are openly.
It is up to us to keep it that way for them until they can take over and make it even better for the next generation.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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As a card carrying member of the press corps, both on and off line; (Read Media) I need to make this point clearly; this particular article, which appeared in the New York Times magazine print edition last Sunday as well as on-line, is NOT a manifestation of the media. The journalist that covered this story is not only well known but also teaches part time at a North Eastern University as well as Emerson College. He is also Gay and has been reporting on LGBT issues for over 10 years, winning several prestigious awards for his coverage.
One of the reasons that journalists like Benoit Denzit-Lewis work hard to cover stories like these is to pave the way for those who follow. The consideration is not motivated by greed, profits, or fame. It is motivated by the ethics of our profession. And, like any given profession, obviously there will be bad apples which can cause cynicism and disdain.
I have been covering a group of '20 somethings' LGBT, and the way that they see themselves in the greater whole. Not unlike the children profiled in Denzit-Lewis' piece, they are struggling to define themselves as human beings who just happen to be LGBT. The number one thing that I keep hearing from them is that it was the Internet that changed their lives and made being LGBT doable, and easier. That is an important aspect to this.
The days of fluke reporting on the I-NET are fast disappearing as it becomes the medium of choice for all, including those of us that professionally cover the stories that make a difference.
Brody Levesque
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Macky
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Really getting into it |
Location: USA
Registered: November 2008
Messages: 973
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"manifestation of the media on behavior"
Brody,
I meant that there's a lot of stuff on the internet casts homosexuality in a good light. This seems to be enough to empower some of these kids to be more open. I do have a concern about it becoming a fad though. Like the girls who may say they are bi because the straight boys like that. And maybe some of the boys can not yet tell the difference between having a good platonic friend and a good romantic friend. When I went to school, they used to talk about the adolescent homosexual stage....that middle school time, when the boys pair up into groups of 2 or so and hang around together all the time. THis was supposed to be a phase that they went through. I wonder how many boys call themselves gay because of this phase thing. Or maybe that's old ideology.
Behold, how good and how pleasant it is
For brothers to dwell together in unity!
Ps 133:1 NASB
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ray2x
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Really getting into it |
Location: USA
Registered: April 2009
Messages: 430
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I will need to postpone reading the entire article for a later time. By reading the brief sippets Timmy left, I think there will be some good times for gay/lesbian/trans youth. Not easy times by any means. Let's take back some rhetoric of the self proclaimed patriotic teabaggers and indeed the tree of liberty does occasionally need watering. Out tree will produce much foliage, all over the world.
Raymundo
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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This "passing phase" thing is something that has hounded me all my life. So I'm going to suggest something about it.
It is an excuse, put about by those who can not now and could not ever bring themselves to admit that they were queer.
Yup, I'll repeat that.
It is an excuse, put about by those who can not now and could not ever bring themselves to admit that they were queer.
This is not a phase and it does not pass. But the pseudo-justification for it is amongst these ideas:- Men like being with men. They just do. All men do
- Boys play best with boys. Girls of the same age are too damned mature anyway
- Men develop very strong bonds. Just look at the armed forces to see workaday examples of it
- Men can truly love other men. They don't need to fuck them, but then can love them enough to die for them
- Men can be really stupid, and do that best in groups
- etc
So this all pervading macho culture is said to have developed from the passing phase where "all boys fall for other boys.
If this were not a gay site I could do a simple survey. It would be "In your youth, when you were growing into being a teenage boy and beyond, did you ever have a phase of wanting to have sex with another boy?"
When you ask boys when you are one they all deny it. And who wouldn't.
So I asked my son.
He said "no" pretty clearly. And he said also that he would have said "yes" if he had. While the intellectual concept of having sex with a boy was Ok, emotionally it was something that he just never wanted to do.
So, that's sample of one against the common statement that all boys want to jump the bones of other boys.
That "phase" crap was propaganda put about by the arsewipes who wanted to make sure that queer kids stayed firmly in their place - the public toilet - and never came near real people ever again. It's intended to make us feel less than normal.
"If your phase hasn't passed then you have not grown up properly!"
And all my instincts say "TO HELL WITH THAT!"
My phase hasn't passed. It will never pass. But I am perfectly grown up!
Today's Gay kids are just like we queer kids form the 60s and 70s, wuth one major advantage. Many of us are now both Out and in positions where we have some influence. As I've said before, our generation, whether we had any real part in it ourselves or not, paved the way with prior and subsequent generations for their generation to be able to be Out And Proud.
Our job is to ensure their safety while they take this brave and wise step. But they must temper their bravery with wisdom about their surroundings. Coming out in Iran or Iraq or Saudi Arabia tends to be fatal.
So I want to hug them, the kids in that article and their friends. And I want to hug those who love them. These kids are the present and they are the future.
And yes, some will get hurt.
So will some heterosexual kids.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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I have, on my blog, created a poll. I will not post the question here because, guess what? Yes, we are all attracted to guys! And this poll needs to be answered by a heterosexual man.
If you feel you are able to answer the poll, which I firmly doubt, please find it on my blog.
If you simply wish to see the answers then look at http://vote.sparklit.com/poll.spark/1107722
I would very much like to see this poll distributed widely, to friends, relations, casual acquaintances, your butcher, baker and candlestick maker. There is an "email this poll" button on the results page.
The small number of answers so far are not statistically significant and should be regarded simply as what they are, the first seven answers.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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A friend who is a statistician explained to me once that a sample is statistically valid, even if small, if every addition to that sample does not change the results in any appreciable manner.
The very few respondents to this poll: http://vote.sparklit.com/poll.spark/1107722 have shown that the ration of 2:1 for those who have never been against those who have been attracted to boys is broadly unchanging.
It looks as if, for those for whom it is a passing phase, it passes. And it looks as if the phase is not universal.
I wish I could get more heterosexual responses though.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Timmy you wrote:
I wish I could get more heterosexual responses though.
And I don't see how you could have anything but heterosexual responses with those questions. A gay person doesn't have a box to tick.
Love,
Anthony
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13800
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Well, what I ought to have said is that I wish I could get more heterosexual men to respond
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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