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Macky
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Really getting into it |
Location: USA
Registered: November 2008
Messages: 973
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I was concerned that my wife would be hurt if she saw me looking at gay porn, so I sorta did it when she wasn't around. Guilt got to me and I told her about it. I got the feeling she would rather I be more open about it, as anything clandestine makes her nervous.
How do the married guys here handle porn insofar as the wife is concerned?.
Max
Behold, how good and how pleasant it is
For brothers to dwell together in unity!
Ps 133:1 NASB
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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Heterosexual women like men, even naked men, though women as a whole tend to find sex emotional (prior to physical action) rather than physical and thus do not really enjoy porn. There are many exceptions to any generalisation.
I asked my wife if she would watch some gay videos with me. I chose Bel Ami as young guys with a sort of plot. I found that, as we watched them, she and I found some aspects distasteful, such as rimming, and she was not keen on anal sex scenes.
The question you need to answer first is what your wife's attitude to porn at all. Some women cannot cope with the idea of their partners masturbating. t can be viewed by them as intellectual infidelity
[Updated on: Sat, 09 January 2010 18:48]
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Max~ As a totally Gay Man, I honestly can't offer you any advice as my doing so would be highly inappropriate. But, not long ago I was doing research for an article I coauthored on Same Sex Attraction while in a Opposite Sex Partnered Relationship/Marriage. I ran across the following in the course of researching the subject at hand.
Here are two excellent websites that are on topic and may be helpful or at least informative for both you AND your spouse: ( The About Us Blurbs; Male Site First. )
Welcome to the website for GAMMA (the Gay And Married Men’s Association) of New South Wales.
Since 1977, GAMMA has been there to support men who are or have been involved in a heterosexual relationship, but who have sexual contact with other men.
The group was begun by men who found themselves in a similar situation, and continues in the same tradition.
Through various activities and services, we help men who are questioning their sexual orientation.
And here's the link:
http://www.gamma.org.au/
Now, for the Mrs. Max, here's this:
In recent years there have been increasing accounts in the media as well as true life stories of married men being attracted to men or coming out as gay or bisexual. However the experiences of the women in the relationships with these men are rarely described.
Despite the relatively high incidence of Australian families affected by the same sex attraction of the male partner, the experiences of Australian women have been relatively unheard - until now.
And here's the link:
http://www.lwchc.org.au/womenpartners/
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Macky
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Really getting into it |
Location: USA
Registered: November 2008
Messages: 973
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Thanks Timmy!
Mrs Max is no prude. I think her tastes might coincide with mine.
I tried inviting her along for a viewing of some really cute college guys on Corbin Fisher. The free stuff there is very soft, even cute. They do smiles well. I don't care to look at anything really down n dirty, but I get a smile on my face when I see a smiling shirtless boy.
As for masturbation...I gave it up last year. My wife does an excellent prostate massage and that can't be beat...why waste one's semen on a regular orgasm when I can have that!
About Bel Ami, does the site give assurance that the models are all over 18. It pays to be paranoid about that in Penna. They prosecute people who view under 18 pretty regularly, and I want to abide by the law totally, for any possible victim's sake, as well as my own.
Thanks again for your insight!
Max
Behold, how good and how pleasant it is
For brothers to dwell together in unity!
Ps 133:1 NASB
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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Bel Ami is what one might term mainstream gay porn, of good ethical reputation. It seems to have created an odd niche for itself in the past with Johan Paulik stating that he is not gay but did it for the money.
In general they favour young looking legal guys with overly large penises. I favour normal sized penises, but the faces are pleasing and the videos are reasonably erotic.
You ought to be able to buy them either mail order, or in a decent adult store on the regular shelves. Or one can here at least.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Macky
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Really getting into it |
Location: USA
Registered: November 2008
Messages: 973
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Hey Brody!
Thanks for the URLs! I think the one for Mrs Max will be of great interest to my wife. She has been seeking discussion with other ladies who have wacky husbands like me.
Its odd how I have never felt attracted to any woman other than my wife, while on the other hand, guys always get appraising looks from me.
I used to go through lots of guys before marriage. I guess that sometimes sex doesn't matter when one meets up with the right person. I just hope Mrs is as happy as I am.
Max
Behold, how good and how pleasant it is
For brothers to dwell together in unity!
Ps 133:1 NASB
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Macky
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Really getting into it |
Location: USA
Registered: November 2008
Messages: 973
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Ill call the local adult store. Its an above board reputable place so if they have Bel Ami, I'm sure it'd be OK. Tx for the info. Max
Ps Sorry to see England's salubrious climate go all to hell. You don't suppose that glacial runoff from Greenland has reduced saltiness of North Atlantic, affecting Gulf Stream, do you.
Behold, how good and how pleasant it is
For brothers to dwell together in unity!
Ps 133:1 NASB
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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it happens every 20 years or so 
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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To answer your original question, Macky, I do look at porn as well as spending far too much time reading gay love stories. I make no attempt to hide it. I don't even delete recent files. The grandchildren know not to use my computer, but when they do (you see they *can* even though they know they shouldn't) they go straight to some childish games sites. Sylvia doesn't ever try to look over my shoulder and I don't ever try to stop her.
But I don't think it would do the grandchildren any harm if they were to see the porn I look at. We are a fairly enlightened family when it comes to sex.
I do sometimes feel guilty about it. I occasionally wonder why.
Love,
Anthony
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
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I am assuming your grandchildren are over 18. If they are not over 18 please edit your post to ensure that you are not advocating or encouraging any unlawful acts. You should be aware that in the UK the Sexual Offences Act 2003 makes itself both clear (and sometimes slightly unclear) on what is and is not lawful.
PLease read http://www.opsi.gov.uk/Acts/acts2003/ukpga_20030042_en_1 and, whether you agree with the law or not, please do not use this site in such a way that you either break it or encourage that breach.
I'd really rather your grandchildren were not mentioned in the same post as adult material which some judge to be pron.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Macky
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Really getting into it |
Location: USA
Registered: November 2008
Messages: 973
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Anthony,
You are my model when I try to decide these types of questions. You are a very good person in my opinion and I try to model my life on what I perceive yours to be. I'm pretty sure that what I consider ideal for myself is what you describe in this post. You're sweet. But hey, you never said that you were into radio before! Were you a DJ?
Max
Behold, how good and how pleasant it is
For brothers to dwell together in unity!
Ps 133:1 NASB
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What an accolade, Macky, you'll have me blushing in a minute!
I was 'Project leader, radio systems development' and in charge of all of the computer systems in use by radios 1, 2, 3 & 4. I'm afraid I didn't ever broadcast. Actually the main thing I did was organise to discontinue an unwieldy and wasteful computer system and replace it with word processing machines which could react much more quickly to the needs of the programme planners. It was a hard thing to do because it went directly against the wishes of my immediate boss - that sounds as if what I did was improper doesn't it?
The whole thing is a long story and in the end I was vindicated and won a few notable battles but lost the war and had to leave the BBC. I got the largest settlement for unfair dismissal the BBC had ever paid out!
Love,
Anthony
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Re: Married men and gay porn 
