I expect simple behaviours here. Friendship, and love. Any advice should be from the perspective of the person asking, not the person giving! We have had to make new membership moderated to combat the huge number of spammers who register
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
Alwasy remember that internet friends may not be what they seem. To be fair, most are what they seem, I have met a great number. But I am also not a cute teenager. And I don't meet teenagers.
Since we have a few younger members here, both to read and to post, I thought it might be time to remind us all that, until we know precisely who they are, internet friends need to be treated with cautiousness in terms of giving personal information away, whether here, or on sites you link to.
Remember that we can pose as the person we wish to be or need to be instead of the people we are. That;s by no means always harmful. We often have issues that can only be worked out by presenting the ideal picture we have of ourselves. It can go wrong, though, if we hurt others while helping ourselves, even if we never intended to.
Also, remember that the harmless uncle type may well be a harmless uncle. But someone who came here a few years ago was jailed for kiddieporn and has 22 and a half suspended years remaining of his sentence. He seemed so nice, too, but he made S&M videos of teen boys in his spare time.
That cute teenager may be all he seems to be. Almost always he is, but a very small percentage of the time he's a law officer going about his lawful business of finding those who groom kids for unlawful acts. I'm happy about that because that cute teenager needs to be protected from the likes of S&M video guy above!
I'm not doing any more here than stating the obvious. I just want to make as sure as any webmaster can that the folk who use the site remember to be wise. I don't want anyone getting hurt, especially if it's a kid. I can't ensure it, but I can make sure we know to be safe.
Location: U.S.
Registered: November 2009
Messages: 630
As always Timmy, wise advice.
As a writer of stories about gay youth who posts online I have been approached dozens of times. It doesn't matter to me if it's a law enforcement officer or a young gay teen, they get the same answer.
By telling me they are underage I always state that I will not discuss the stories I write, they aren't supposed to be reading them. I tell them I understand the availability of the work and how I see that such things can be attractive. But I emphasise that the work is fiction and not based upon any experience I might have had.
Then I suggest the proper place to meet their needs would be a local gay youth group and if they have told me where they live I include a link to such a site. I understand the frustration, I had no internet as a child, no source of information. But approaching an author of gay stories is hardly a reputible resource of knowledge.
To those of my adult friends who tell me of the boy who emails them with tales of being raped or molested I can only caution them to tell the kid to report it. It's not the solution, such actions only out the poor lad to everyone, it must be stopped before it happens.
Why would a perfectly intelligent boy meet someone online and go out to meet them? It's an act of desperation to understand themselves. Damn those who would keep the gay youth from the knowledge about themselves that might prevent such atrocity. Damn those who condemn gay kids from their high and mighty religious pulpits.
What sense of immorality allows religion to condemn a person being gay when they say all else is this false God's will? May the Goddess forgive them, I can't.
Age appears to be best in four things; old wood best to burn, old wine to drink, old friends to trust, and old authors to read. (Sir Francis Bacon 1561-1626)
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
I have no difficulty in answering anyone's questions, though I will discuss sex in a clinical manner only. Clinical descriptions are often what the asker is looking for. I believe in answering questions and answering a plea for advice. But that is very different from meeting, or from asking to meet.
Location: Worcester, England
Registered: January 2005
Messages: 1560
I'm not sure if this has been posted here recently, but it's worth watching. It's shown very widely in UK schools, mainly to 12 and 13 year olds.
"The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral, begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy. ... Returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night devoid of stars." Martin Luther King
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
I've not seen it before. I was wondering where the bike was when he came out of the house. I'm ever practical! Is there a version where a girl is tricked? While the message is very strong for gay teens I tend to be upset if homosexuality = paedophilia in the public's mind
As for the bike - it rang true to me. After a scary and abusive experience, my own impulse always was to get the hell out of it asap - and I very much doubt that I'd have thought about the bike. In the same way, victims of domestic violence often initially run blindly away from the home, rather than jumping in the car or on a bus, however convenient they may be
"The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral, begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy. ... Returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night devoid of stars." Martin Luther King
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13796
The videos do look useful. I'm ambivalent about CEOP itself. I've watched one of their PR folk on TV and felt bullied instead of protected, kind of. I do feel that protection of our children is the responsibility of parents, and I'm not sure whether a kid will watch a video and think "so what?" or whether notice will be taken.
I expect the bike had been stolen. He didn't lock it and it wasn't on the railings when he emerged.
] 
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