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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13751
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I have just received the most difficult news.
My friend, "The Scholar" died on Friday 29 November at 7:45 pm. I have received an simple email from his partner.
"The Scholar" was Paul. His partner is Simon. In the stories. In life their names are different
I have very few words to better the simple ones sent to me by his partner. I am editting them slightly to remove any real names. Those are up to his partner.
He says:
Dear Timmy
It is with a broken heart that I am writing to inform you The Scholar died at 7.45pm on Friday, 29 November.
During the past week, he had gained confidence in being able to go out of the house. I arrived home yesterday to find a note telling me that he had gone for a walk and thought nothing more of it.
To cut a long story short, he had, by all accounts been on his way home when he walked between two parked cars to cross the road and was hit by a car coming along the road. The car stopped and an ambulance was called and he died on his injuries in the hospital.
As you know, he had been working on a number of Paul and Simon stories recently and I have a disc containing those he had completed. I know he was intending to send them to you on an "every so often" basis, so that is why I am sending this one to you today.
If it isn't any good - ignore it.
I want to thank you for giving him the opportunity to showcase his writings on your site. I know that he was very proud to see what he termed as his "scribblings" as a hosted work and equally proud to feel they gave others pleasure in reading them.
I well remember his face at the sight of that first hosted story and his reaction to the name you suggested and I agreed on for him - The Scholar. It makes me smile to think of this now.
I must dash now, as I have a few other emails to send off, but I hope we can stay in touch.
Love as ever
Emails to "scholar@iomfats.org" will reach his partner.
I have no words of my own to put here. Let his gentle writings stand as his memorial.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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This was the last thing I expected to see when I checked the board this morning. This is an incredible and shocking tragedy. It is so sad to see such a gentle and compassionate man die like this. He will be truly missed.
Simon is also in my prayers. May God comfort him during this tragic time.
-Tom
"Whatever is sought for can be caught, you know,
whatever is neglected slips away."
Oedipus Rex, lines 126-127
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tim...of usa
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Likes it here |
Location: buffalo, new york...USA
Registered: July 2002
Messages: 266
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words are said to help heal wounds and the scholar has helpped heal a few hurting souls.
my words now are plain and simple.
my heart greaves
my souls feels pain
my mind is reeling
and i know that yet another sweet kind soul
is at peace and in a place of rest.
peace and rest scholar
tim
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13751
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No Message Body
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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I spoke to smith not too long ago. He was heading out to do the duties of the day. I said I was heading out for a walk, so he told me to write something when I came back.
I kept thinking while walking along the snow-dusted forest path what I should type on my keyboard. If I should tell of how the white snow on the trees in contrast with all the black shadows and the dark skies gave me flashbacks from winters years and years ago when I was still a kid.
Maybe I should tell of how amused I was recently, when I saw someone had locked his (or her?) bike to my bike... It's been standing in the same position for YEARS, untouched, so it's like a stationary object really.
Then I come home, and notice the chill has given me a really bad headache and think if I should whine about that. As I'm making a pot of tea, timmy messages me with the awful news...
...And now I feel absolutely speechless.
I was supposed to send Robert an email a couple days ago. Hotmail ate the first one, I wrote another, short one, that I would re-type it... I never got around to do it because it was so long, and I had put parts of my soul into it and doing it all over was kinda painful even, and now I feel terrible about it.
I'm so sorry... I don't know what to say. R, you were a dear friend I was just starting to get to know. Thank you for all your sweet, wonderful stories, for your words here and in email, and for just being you. Love, always:
-Lenny
"But he that hath the steerage of my course,
direct my sail."
-William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, Act One, Scene IV
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smith
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On fire! |
Registered: January 1970
Messages: 1095
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All his earthly troubles eased, I pray Scholar rests easy and at peace in the hollow of God's hand. My heart goes out to "Simon". My prayers reach out to him as he makes sense of his loss.
Warmest love,
smith
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13751
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Write it to him as he was then. Send it to him. "Simon" will read it.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13751
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His stories mean he lives on in our hearts well beyind the time when anyone else might fade.
His haikus will rotate and becme "haiku of the moment" periodically, and remind us of his life.
I knew him a little. "Simon" knew him for ever. KNOWS him for ever.
Simon, nothing we say here can ease your pain. All we can do is show you we feel. Time will never erase "Paul", but it will allow you contentment, I hope, as you remmeber the wonderful expereince of loving your childhood sweetheart. You have something awesome, a thing so many of us could never have.
I fear there are things you will find come to mind to hurt you. Try not to allow them to. This was not your fault.
Many people will try to comfort you. "Simon", if you want instead to be angry, BE angry. All these emotions are allowed. We will try to catch you when you hurt the most.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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I was thinking about our dearly departed family member, and I thought back to the first time I came here. I had recieved a lot of replies that day from a lot of people welcoming me, and giving me some advice concerning Conor. And I thought, did The Scholar post anything? If so, I'd be really interested to refresh myself on what he said. So I went back, and I found it:
"Hello Tom
Yet another belated welcome. As regards your friend - listen to the guys who have offered support on this message board - they're the best bunch you could ever wish to meet and helped me a great deal.
Good luck and happy to meet you."
I know it may not seem like a lot to most of us, but it means something to me. Although I did not get to know The Scholar very well, and now I am upset that I did not, it hurts to lose a family member, and someone who was rooting for me all along.
Thank you, Scholar, for your good words and your support.
-Tom
"Whatever is sought for can be caught, you know,
whatever is neglected slips away."
Oedipus Rex, lines 126-127
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tim...of usa
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Likes it here |
Location: buffalo, new york...USA
Registered: July 2002
Messages: 266
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i was chatting with a friend form here awhile ago and it struck me, we now have our very own gaurding angle.
The Scolar will ive on for a long long time in our hearts and his words.
peace
tim..of USA
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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What a loss! A very talented writer will be missed by this reader.
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I am so sorry I never got to know more of you the Person. I enjoyed you writings as I am sure did others. What a gift to bring a moments joy or happiness or involvement. Your style is forever pressed against many hearts.
Simon, you have memories to keep you close to the Scholar.. I would like to add my hugs to you for the loss..
People have a habit of changing your direction through life
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13751
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I have a fever
It's a rising temperature
But he knows me not
By The Scholar
I will take no special steps to keep it there. It just happens to be fiting right now
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13751
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If you click here you will find a small haiku I have written. A poor work, really, and yet it expresses how I think we all feel about him. Clicking the link will add to the votes for it and let it become Haiku of the Moment earlier than it might otherwise.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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These are my sentiments as well. Take heart Simon. Mike
Friendship is the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts or measure words
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As you shake off the cares of this world, Scholar, fly high and far. Infinite possiblities, new worlds for you, gentle spirit. Simon's grief will turn to joy when you meet each other again, in whatever dreams there be.
The day before New Year, every year, Man and I make a small ceremony at the local Buddhist temple near our house. We remember all our family and friends who have died, in order to ensure that their memory remains strong in our hearts.
I recommend the process, in whatever way others of you choose to do it.
"Always forgive your enemies...nothing annoys them quite so much." Oscar Wilde
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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I am so sorry to hear this news today. Simon, i've never chatted with you or The Scholar, but i feel as though one of the family has been lost. My thoughts will be with you.
Brian
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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I have read his storys and they showed to me a caring and loving person.
My heart goes out to you Simon.
He will be missed by all of us.
Peace to you
Warp1
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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13751
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It will stop soon, because it cannnot continue.
Every Haiku of the Moment since I heard of The Scholar's death has been one of his. That will end because there are no more with the right number of votes to take over from the current one.
I don't know quite why or how it happened, and I have not manufactured it. It just seems special.
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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Original lyrics not in English. Translated by yours truly to the best of his limited ability:
"Miraklet" (The Miracle), by Thomas DiLeva
I am so happy because you're with me
You capture me with every game
And anything can always happen
Because in our dream, everything is a touch.
I hug you through space
You're beaming yellow, I laugh blue
And we follow each other through eternity
A glittering wind that is the two of us.
(chorus)
You and I, is the miracle here
(x4)
I'm born in every look you give me
I give you everyting, you give me more
You smile so warmly at my thoughts
Since that day when I said 'hello'.
(chorus)
The miracle...
(chorus)
The miracle...
-L
"But he that hath the steerage of my course,
direct my sail."
-William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, Act One, Scene IV
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mark181
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Getting started |
Registered: January 1970
Messages: 1
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May Scholar rest in peace in God's hand. Please accpet my sympathy, Simon.
Sincerely,
Mark181
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e
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On fire! |
Location: currently So Cal
Registered: May 2002
Messages: 1179
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I am very saddened by the news of The Scholar's death. He was truly a very warm, kind, and creative soul. I enjoyed his stories. We had a chance to correspond on occasion and I counted him among my friends.
I would like to offer my condolences to "Simon" and am very sorry for your loss. TS was a very wonderful person.
Think good thoughts,
e
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Darren
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Likes it here |
Registered: January 1970
Messages: 190
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I have not checked the MB in a few days and I was shocked to find out that the "Scholar" has died, and so quickly too. I heart goes out to Simon, as the loss of one's life partner is probably the most difficult event to witness.
I hope that we can all comfort him in his loss.
Darren
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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How we will miss him. May he fly with angels and may "Simon" feel surrounded with love, especially from those of us who so loved Scholar's wonderful stories.
Jackie
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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FOR A THOUSAND YEARS
Teardrops in my eyes, a dance of glistening rain
Falling from the sky, a carpet of the stars
Clouds of tenderness are fleeing in the light
Now it's here, the light for a thousand years
I tremble in your eyes, I tremble in your palms
Lie inside you deep, in dreams of yours I sleep
Carress you with my eyes and love you with my hands
Yes, I feel the light for a thousand years
I know, you are my love
A touch, a kiss, your heart is mine
I know, the light is always here
We kiss each other in its shine
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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I had just starting reading scholar's works. This really saddens me. His partner, his family etc have my deepest thoughts
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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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The Scholar, as you named him, was properly named. His writing was clear, sensative, and realistic, and he touched one's heart with his accurate understanding of human affections. His death is a distinct loss to the literature dealing with both adolescent love and more mature emotions. He expressed himself gracefully and charmed readers. It is indeed sad that we have lost this fine writer, and generous man. We should remember him fondly. Aitchdee
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Steve
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Really getting into it |
Location: London, England
Registered: November 2006
Messages: 465
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It is a great comfort to know that he can still "speak" to me in this way. I hope that this knowledge is a comfort to Stephen as well.
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