I expect simple behaviours here. Friendship, and love. Any advice should be from the perspective of the person asking, not the person giving! We have had to make new membership moderated to combat the huge number of spammers who register
In addition to everything that's right about that response, I note the second sentence in the letter:
We are part of a church group and I fear that if people in that group find out they will make fun of me for having a gay child.
One wonders if that is the sort of response to be expected from the members of whatever church the letter writer refers to and if so, why does the letter writer wish to remain associated with such people?
Why I don't have an advice column: My first reaction to the letter was, "Troll alert! No one in the second decade of the twenty first century can possibly be that ignorant. And no one who can hold down a paying job can possibly be that stupid!" (Upon careful reconsideration I can think of a number of counter-examples to that last sentence, many of them in the United States Congress.) I would have been tempted to reduce the response to its first and last paragraphs, which is why the world is better off with Amy Dickinson writing an advice column and not myself.
Location: New Zealand
Registered: August 2009
Excellent advice, but the letter-writer is probably too stupid to hear it. Those people are out there - and they vote. (scary!)
On a slightly-related note, i once forgot my no.1 daughter's birthday. Well, she'd just left home and out of sight, out of mind. But it was her 18th and it was just a couple of weeks after we'd watched the old movie 'Sixteen Candles', which is about parents forgetting their daughter's birthday That is never going to happen again as reminders come loud & long every year now.