I expect simple behaviours here. Friendship, and love. Any advice should be from the perspective of the person asking, not the person giving! We have had to make new membership moderated to combat the huge number of spammers who register
Location: Canada
Registered: December 2003
Messages: 869
Yesterday Andrew Belonsky wrote convincingly at Towleroad in the blog's daily closing article, "I'm Gay: The 50 Most Powerful Coming Outs of 2012", of the breadth and scope, diversity if you will, and of the empowerment, provided by these brave souls. I could not help tearing up as I read many a summation accorded each individual and their poignant, and often heart-wrenching, story.
Andrew is one but many an author contributing to a story arc that has been a year-long event at Towelroad. You'll find them all archived here.
In short, Andy Towle and his staff are declaring "2012: The Gayest year ever".
Media attention like this just makes me want to wrap myself in fuchsia (maybe pink anyone?) and lavender and strut my stuff anew all up and down the gay boulevard, ankle-length otter draped over my shoulders, boa and single-strand and knotted, heirloom, pearls flying, shod in my Joan Crawford come fuck-me pumps, seamed silk-stockings and garter belt, drenched in my best designer fragrance and livery, bejewelled and bedecked to the nines, proclaiming my fabulousness to all and sundry. The problem is I've done it all before, in what seems centuries ago ... well at least a lifetime no matter how you count it ... and I can't help but wonder "When will events in Mr. Belonsky's article (and others') become non-events?" "When will Gay-marriage simply be marriage?" "When will one's sexuality be a non-starter and not something that principally defines who we are in the minds of others?"
And I do have other questions too ... what about you?
Warren C. E. Austin
The Gay Deceiver
Toronto, Canada
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13694
I found my own coming out to be the most powerful one I experienced. It was personal. I had to do it many times, and it was personal each time. I am in favour of people being out, not of their coming out.
In Australia I was able to "be out". I was working a part time job in food service and when asked why I was taking home so much food I simply replied it was for my boyfriend. It was a non-issue and a non-decision. Much like any heterosexual couple talking about their daily lives to coworkers.
It's weird living in Japan because while I am out to quite a few people here, each time feels like a decision. Each time I have to "come out". Generally the reactions have been good so perhaps my trepidation and closeting is self-imposed, but I also know that in many way it's just a country where things aren't spoken of. It's a society where gender roles are still quite strict and media representations of alternate sexuality are scarcer than representations of transgender. "Gay" is scary because it fucks with gender roles, but "a man that wants to be a woman"? We Japanese can understand that and sympathise with that because it's just a genetic malfunction, just the wrong body got paired with the wrong brain.
I love that the West is embracing the normalcy of being gay more and more. I just hope it can be universal. I hope that eventually there aren't any "gays" there are just "men with boyfriends/ husbands".