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You are here: Home > Forum > A Place of Safety > Literary Merit > AZ Story Guy's "Never Forget,"
AZ Story Guy's "Never Forget,"   [message #69874] Sat, 04 July 2015 00:39 Go to next message
larkin is currently offline  larkin

Toe is in the water
Location: Massachusetts
Registered: June 2015
Messages: 58



AZ Story Guy,

I've read your first two chapters of "Never Forget" I can tell that there is more to come so it would not be fair for me to launch a critique on an unfinished work.
 
I did read the "prescript" where the author explains his methods to the reader.  Although not serious, it comes off as a bit of a spoiler.  I would opt for trusting your readers and if they don't get it, consider some restructuring or a literary device to clue them in.  If the story requires ambiguity, the loose ends might be dealt with in a postscript.
  
What I see happening here is something more that run of the mill flash-backs.  I am reminded of Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse Five where time is fluid.   The main character is searching for himself.

I generally look for the positive and I especially like the diamond in the rough.  I also don't give a shit about spelling errors.

So AZ Story Guy, I like what you have so far. 

Lark
Re: AZ Story Guy's "Never Forget,"   [message #69875 is a reply to message #69874] Sat, 04 July 2015 06:53 Go to previous messageGo to next message
ChrisR is currently offline  ChrisR

Likes it here
Location: Western US
Registered: October 2014
Messages: 136



Wholeheartedly agree! This is quite a story thus far, and based on a nice twist. Seems like no sooner do I figure that every story that *can* be told *has been* told, some new word knight comes down the tilt to knock me off my steed.

Nice job, AZStoryGuy. I'm looking forward to the remaining pieces of the puzzle.
Re: AZ Story Guy's "Never Forget,"   [message #69881 is a reply to message #69875] Sun, 05 July 2015 09:02 Go to previous message
timmy

Has no life at all
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13607



He said he had only one story in him. He was mistaken. Please encourage him to write more



Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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