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One Of Us  [message #78621] Sun, 05 November 2023 07:27 Go to next message
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Don't you love a mystery as much as I do?  https://iomfats.org/storyshelf/hosted/richard-campbell/one-o f-us/01.html and this story by Richard Cambell is slowly revealing some secret which is kept hidden. A new boy in school attaches himself to the loner in the class and they become friends. Whilst Peter suspects Mark has a problem with his parents, neither we, the readers, nor Mark, know who Peter is or where he's from, only he acts sometimes somewhat older than fifteen.
Re: One Of Us  [message #78622 is a reply to message #78621] Mon, 06 November 2023 01:58 Go to previous messageGo to next message
JCDII is currently offline  JCDII

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I agree with you and am liking this story a lot!  It's nice that Peter is bringing Mark out of his deep deep shell. You have to hope that something physical comes out of it also. The father is a real a..hole. 
And there is a real lot more to find out about Peter and his 'family'. I just hope that it doesn't wind up that he's a vampire.
Have read a couple of other stories like that recently...
He shows real empathy for Mark and just the piano recital is a big step forward.
Re: One Of Us  [message #78623 is a reply to message #78622] Mon, 06 November 2023 05:49 Go to previous messageGo to next message
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"JCDII wrote on Mon, 06 November 2023 01:58"
.... I just hope that it doesn't wind up that he's a vampire.
Have read a couple of other stories like that recently...


--
I was thinking along the same lines, perhaps Peter will turn out to be another Duncan MacLeod of the Clan Macleod, in other words an immortal! Most stories have no synopsis and so impossible to know the genre. Likewise there are no author bio's, usually, but Richard Campbell does state:  "I spend much of my time travelling around Europe in a campervan, and rely on internet cafes to keep in touch."  which does kind of date the author (do internet cafes still exist?).

Actually the story itself is dated, to what year I'm not sure, but at  guess at least forty years ago in the seventies or eighties? The clues are all there, he talks about:    shop assistants and bus conductors   no mobile phones, no internet.

That doesn't distract from the story, I like period stories, as much as any other well written books. It does in a way pose another question, because I don't think Richard Campbell is alone on here as being of the older generation. The question: do young guys today read anything other than Manga, aka - books with pictures? And do they write?

Another observation, these stories of a certain epoch by authors of an older generation do tend to fall into a category of gay stories that developed in the nineties with the internet and posting online. Pornographic tales pure and simple gave way to gay themed stories, but which were still with sex in every chapter, just maybe better written and with a real story and plot constructed around the sex. This story is no exception, like the other one currently running, I quote: "Sliding the swollen organ through the slit in his pyjama trousers he quickly stroked himself to a satisfying if messy climax."   

I ask lots of questions about what I'm reading and that's because I find it interesting to discover the context of stories and how we got to where we are today and why we still have restrictions, but I digress into another topic for another thread, about what's allowed and what's not.
Re: One Of Us  [message #78624 is a reply to message #78621] Mon, 06 November 2023 18:47 Go to previous messageGo to next message
timmy

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It takes a while to discover the era in which this is set.

[Updated on: Mon, 06 November 2023 18:47]




Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
Re: One Of Us  [message #78630 is a reply to message #78623] Tue, 07 November 2023 20:24 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Chas is currently offline  Chas

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"James K wrote on Mon, 06 November 2023 05:49"

"JCDII wrote on Mon, 06 November 2023 01:58"
.... I just hope that it doesn't wind up that he's a vampire.
Have read a couple of other stories like that recently...




--
I was thinking along the same lines, perhaps Peter will turn out to be another Duncan MacLeod of the Clan Macleod, ?
.


--Is that a story available here?  Who's the author?

Im very much enjoying One of Us and looking forward to the next instalment.
Re: One Of Us  [message #78633 is a reply to message #78630] Wed, 08 November 2023 05:59 Go to previous messageGo to next message
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"Chas wrote on Tue, 07 November 2023 20:24"

"James K wrote on Mon, 06 November 2023 05:49"

"JCDII wrote on Mon, 06 November 2023 01:58"
.... I just hope that it doesn't wind up that he's a vampire.
Have read a couple of other stories like that recently...









--
I was thinking along the same lines, perhaps Peter will turn out to be another Duncan MacLeod of the Clan Macleod, ?
.







--Is that a story available here?  Who's the author?





--
http://youtu.be/M4Lv82l6Q6Y

https://forum.iomfats.org/?t=getfile&id=5344&private=0
Re: One Of Us  [message #78634 is a reply to message #78630] Wed, 08 November 2023 17:02 Go to previous messageGo to next message
JCDII is currently offline  JCDII

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Well, the main story that I remember reading recently was on the Story Lover's site
The New Reality:  Book one - Rebirth by Justin

https://storylover.us/?t=CWYSqpOrzkQLNhBuy

I do like the Highlander guess too, that was posted. Guess it will be a while before we know for sure. 
Still enjoying the story.  The bath scene was very erotic....glad Mark and Peter have 'come out' to each other!
Re: One Of Us  [message #78636 is a reply to message #78630] Thu, 09 November 2023 03:46 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Mark

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"Chas wrote on Tue, 07 November 2023 13:24"

"James K wrote on Mon, 06 November 2023 05:49"

"JCDII wrote on Mon, 06 November 2023 01:58"
.... I just hope that it doesn't wind up that he's a vampire.
Have read a couple of other stories like that recently...






--
I was thinking along the same lines, perhaps Peter will turn out to be another Duncan MacLeod of the Clan Macleod, ?
.




--Is that a story available here?  Who's the author?




--

While not the story being referred to, I'm sure, I hope I may be permitted to toss out a quick mention that I have a Highlander fanfic story here on IOMFATS, found here.
Re: One Of Us  [message #78638 is a reply to message #78621] Fri, 10 November 2023 16:41 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Merkin is currently offline  Merkin

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I am enjoying this tale immensely, and am greatly satisfied to witness Mark's development.  One does wonder, however, when Peter will get around to explaining himself.  My guesses so far:
--He is a 300 year-old elf.
--He landed on earth in a capsule from the planet Krypton.
--He is a werewolf of indeterminate age.  For some reason werewolves appear to be very popular among gay authors, and readers would no doubt welcome those credentials.

The question is, what Choice will Mark be offered?

Merkin

[Updated on: Fri, 10 November 2023 16:42]

Re: One Of Us  [message #78639 is a reply to message #78638] Fri, 10 November 2023 18:21 Go to previous messageGo to next message
timmy

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When I read it to approve it I had several ideas, too. One of mine was right, but not in the way I anticipated.



Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
Re: One Of Us  [message #78642 is a reply to message #78639] Sun, 12 November 2023 08:37 Go to previous messageGo to next message
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The story is very introspective, so much so that you are almost forced to think that what you read appears to be the views of the author on relationships and love, or falling in love, it simply goes too far (chapter four) to be just about the protagonists, Mark and Peter. For how many chapters can you build up the suspense and mystery around an eventual revelation? Especially when rather than building suspense there are tiny teases and a majority of forestalling, little hints about Peter sprinkled as sparsely as four leaved clover amidst fields of reflection and incredibly slow development. Okay, the two characters are engaging, but the story is bordering on waffle. I think we know that Mark has relationship problems, Peter is more mature, but still can be insecure, and Emily and Victor are liberal and accepting. The Captain is an arsehole and his wife part of the furniture. What else is there to say?

I sincerely hope the next chapter brings some action, because much as I like the two main characters there is other than them, no sub-plots, no other interest, the intrusion of tropes, Peter is rich, adopted, and the "One of Us," must include his adoptive parents, their friends and acquaintances invited for the musical soirée, who are all immortal vampires or freemasons, I'm not yet sure which, but I hope it's revealed before the end of the book and that the story gets some plot other than "Saving Private Mark!"
Re: One Of Us  [message #78657 is a reply to message #78642] Thu, 16 November 2023 06:47 Go to previous messageGo to next message
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Two chapters further along and my hope, "I sincerely hope the next chapter brings some action," has not yet been fulfilled, unless you count nervous vomiting at the musical evening and redesigning the garden at Pete's house. What I have learnt by looking up some historical references, Mary Whitehouse and the age of consent, is that the story is set somewhere in the eighties which makes the progressive attitude of Pete's adoptive parents rather outstanding. After all, not only do Emily and Victor fully support their son's homosexuality and his relationship with Mark, they also don't mind them having sex together at home. I can't imagine that situation as anything other than a fantasy and the teasing problem of Pete's increasing irritability and his loss of energy seem to be leading more and more towards some kind of zombie apocalypse! The slow pace of the story, like the decline of Peter, is putting everything at risk, relationship and story, but I have a feeling there may still be time to save the day, we will see!
Re: One Of Us  [message #78658 is a reply to message #78657] Thu, 16 November 2023 18:09 Go to previous messageGo to next message
ThisRick is currently offline  ThisRick

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A good case of how tastes in literature vary. I quite like this tale and don't mind the slow pace at all. The mystery part doesn't particularly interest me, but the characterizations and plot are captivating. Although details are quite different (cf Tolstoy's happy families) I had a significantly dysfunctional family of origin that all these decades later still has an imprint on me.

Also like the slow pace of their sexual awakening. So often in the genre of unpaid gay erotic writing the action goes from zero to infinity in very short time frames. While some experienced gay men do this regularly, that doesn't mean it happens for everybody, nor that it always happens for young people just starting out.
Re: One Of Us  [message #78659 is a reply to message #78658] Fri, 17 November 2023 05:30 Go to previous messageGo to next message
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"ThisRick wrote on Thu, 16 November 2023 18:09"
...the characterizations and plot are captivating.
(I) like the slow pace of their sexual awakening.

--
I too like the characters, but what is the plot? Is it Mark's escape from his terrible family or is it something else, the lurking mystery that surrounds Peter? The slow pace of their sexual awakening is super and I agree with you on that point, however the slow unravelling of the mystery is a little frustrating rather than captivating, intriguing and a tease, with tiny clues as rare as ducks teeth!
Re: One Of Us  [message #78660 is a reply to message #78659] Fri, 17 November 2023 08:52 Go to previous messageGo to next message
timmy

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Pretty clearly this is not a story that gives immediate gratification. You will notice that it has 14 chapters and that, this morning, we are at the half way point. Were the plot to be revealed in chapter seven what would happen for the remaining seven chapters? That is rhetorical.

The key question is "Are you enjoing it?"

If so, please continue to enjoy it without complaining about the fact that the slow reveal is not to your taste.

If not, there is both no need to read it and certainly no need to continue to complain about it.

Indeed there is no reason to compalin about it at all. Moderators here are likely, very soon, to close your comments down where they consider them injurious to other people's experiences of the site and of the forum.

Consider, please, that you are, in your own way, creating plot spoilers. Since many here wait until a serial is finished before they start to read a story that is doing your colleagues a huge disservice. This is a polite request to cease spoiling it for others. 

[Updated on: Fri, 17 November 2023 11:57]




Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
Re: One Of Us  [message #78661 is a reply to message #78660] Fri, 17 November 2023 12:56 Go to previous messageGo to next message
JCDII is currently offline  JCDII

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Thank you Timmy!
I like this story very much and yes, it may seem a little slow moving at times, but it is rich in
characterization and plot - the new love between two boys, the unwavering father and meek mother, the piano teacher,
the other students and team members that may or may not figure out what the boys have, and the underlying currents
of what exactly are, the parents, their friends and Pete of course....make it all very interesting.

I was getting bored with the negative comments.  After all, this forum is called Literary Merit!
Re: One Of Us  [message #78663 is a reply to message #78661] Sat, 18 November 2023 07:51 Go to previous messageGo to next message
timmy

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OFF TOPIC
The forum member responsible for the negative comments has chosen to leave. There was a message about ther leaving, but it was not appropriate for this thread, so it has gone. They asked me to delete their account, which I have, and implemented other safeguards against their return. I think it a shame, because they were welcome here provided they played well with other children.

This cut their leaving short. My normal approach is to show someone the error of their ways and to explain that continuing in the manner they are interacting will show that they have made the decision to leave. When they continue I enshrine their decision in "software" (stone).

[Updated on: Sat, 18 November 2023 07:55]




Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
Re: One Of Us  [message #78664 is a reply to message #78621] Sat, 18 November 2023 21:34 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Chas is currently offline  Chas

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I have to say that I am thoroughly enjoying this story, and very much looking forward to finding out who "us" are.

I'd like to add that I am a (recently retired) professional classical musician and it's clear that the author knows what he's about when he writes about music.
Re: One Of Us  [message #78665 is a reply to message #78621] Fri, 24 November 2023 14:48 Go to previous messageGo to next message
ReticentOne is currently offline  ReticentOne

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I must say I'm thoroughly enjoying the story. The mystery, characters and character development are uniquely gratifying. If I had anything to quibble with it would be the interminable chapter length. I read before bedtime and though I'm an above average reader I seem to be rereading much more than normal in order to get back into the swing of the story and pick up where I left off. Reading an entire chapter in one setting is pretty much out of the question. My sweet spot seems to be five- to eight thousand word chapters and ten- to fifteen thousand word short stories. These fall in normal ranges from what I've seen of surveys on the issue. Otherwise, I'll keep enjoying the work.

[Updated on: Fri, 24 November 2023 14:49]




g.l.
Re: One Of Us  [message #78666 is a reply to message #78665] Fri, 24 November 2023 15:01 Go to previous messageGo to next message
timmy

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I think the author designed the long chapters both because there is a great deal to be dealt with in the plot and because he didn't want too many chapters to delay the conclusion too far into the future.

As webmaster I read it all in one sitting!  I can see why one would not normally choose to do that, but I have to read them all before starting the publishing



Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
Re: One Of Us  [message #78667 is a reply to message #78666] Mon, 04 December 2023 20:24 Go to previous messageGo to next message
JCDII is currently offline  JCDII

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Well that was certanly an exciting penultimate chapter!  sort of expected, but not the way it played out exactly.
Can we talk you into tomorrow being Wednesday again?? Smile
Can't wait for the finale!  - John
Re: One Of Us  [message #78668 is a reply to message #78667] Mon, 04 December 2023 22:12 Go to previous messageGo to next message
timmy

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It's rather good, isn't it!

I don't think I can suffer from Old Timers' for two weeks in a row!



Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
Re: One Of Us  [message #78669 is a reply to message #78621] Sun, 10 December 2023 18:23 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Chas is currently offline  Chas

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This just has to be one of the best GT Romance tales I have ever read.   The mystery had me guessing right up to Chapter 12 and the writing is, in my opinion, stylish and clear.  Thank you, Mr Campbell.
Re: One Of Us  [message #78670 is a reply to message #78669] Sun, 10 December 2023 22:20 Go to previous message
timmy

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I think both its gentleness and the stealth with whcih the almost inevitable ending arrives makes it an excellent piece of writing.

Everyting is there, right from the start, yet we cannot see it until the end.



Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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