>>Well, there's the Transexual Vegan Lesbian Epedemiologist Punk For Peace. There is also - kids stop reading here - a group called "Masturbate for Peace http://www.masturbateforpeace.com which advocates "using self-love to end conflict." At first I thought this was some kind of bogus group - a nasty little trick concocted by The Federalist Society to discredit the antiwar movement - but apparently not. According to a report in The Independent, the group has collected almost 10,000 signatures on the Internet from 82 countries. Among their slogans: "Whack your sack, not Iraq." Clever dicks.<<

Here endeth the quote from my newspaper.