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Guest
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On fire! |
Registered: March 2012
Messages: 2344
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A friend advised me to share an update with some good friends who will understand: things have gone from bad to worse at home. My wife, who has known about my orientation for four years has become more and more emotionally abusive.
She'll go out to sulk on the living room couch. If I don't come out to console her, she starts hitting the couch or table tops very hard with full force of her harms. I fear that our son will be awakened and share in the terror.
When I come out to console her, I sit on the couch with her and she slams things hard within my proximity. I know that this is not physical abuse, but I am a whimp. When she slams things I jump and gasp, and then she makes comments like "I'm not going to really hurt you." Then I shake like a leaf. I tell her anything she wants to hear: I love her, I want to improve the marriage. What I really wish is that she would get killed in a traffic accident. Then I would be free from her endless punishment.
I am being punished for being the gay member of a fundamental right wing marriage. Helpless to do anything. Of course, if I were to react in any negative way (and I don't), she can call the police or the church and complain about abuse because she is female. If I called to do the same I would be laughed at and I would be considered the root of the problem, since I'm gay and she's normal, poor persecuted woman...
It got so bad on my birthday (such a day to remember) that I went to my private emergency stash and got all my money in cash so that I could make a deposit on an apartment the next day. But I can't do it. If I leave she will redirect her anger on my son. I know this because she did it with our older kids, transfering her anger and intimidation from one to the other as each left the nest. When it was my daughter's turn to be her whipping boy, my wife bloodied her face because she wouldn't practice the piano. Since then I told her that if she ever touched our children again I would call child protective services.
Know I understand why women who are abused cannot leave. At least there are safe houses for women who must escape their marriages. There is nothing like this for men in my area.
Thanks for listening.
I think it is my guilt... being the black sheep, the gay man that keeps me from taking action. I have enough money now for first month's rent and deposit on a little slum tenement.
God help me live through one more night at home.
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share the terror
By: Guest on Wed, 26 March 2003 16:00 |
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Lost for words of help
By: timmy on Wed, 26 March 2003 17:57 |
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Re: share the terror
By: Guest on Wed, 26 March 2003 20:51 |
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I agree with both, but one more than the other.
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You know a room is reserved here for you whenever you need it.....
By: Guest on Wed, 26 March 2003 21:36 |
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Re: share the terror
By: e on Wed, 26 March 2003 21:54 |
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Very good suggestions.......
By: Guest on Wed, 26 March 2003 21:58 |
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Without having read the other replies...
By: lenny on Wed, 26 March 2003 22:28 |
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If I might...........
By: smith on Wed, 26 March 2003 22:30 |
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Re: If I might...........
By: rbryce on Thu, 27 March 2003 12:54 |
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surrounded by friends
By: Guest on Thu, 27 March 2003 15:33 |
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Re: surrounded by friends
By: rbryce on Thu, 27 March 2003 20:05 |
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