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This is a general message to everyone. My prayers and hopes were answered that Simon would recover, which he has. We chatted today, and everything between him and I is over. I promised his parents I wouldn't beg for him to forgive me, and I didn't. After what I did, I don't deserve to be forgiven.
I'll love no other. It's my punishment for being who I am. All I can hope for is that things will be over soon to rid me of the hurt. Don't worry, I'm not going to "off" myself. I'm leaving that up to "HIM" to decide my fate.
I let others influence my actions, which was my mistake. It won't happen again. I'm adding a poem written by Stephen Bradshaw that showed his love for someone. I hope it explains how much I love Simon.
Goodbye
I don’t know what you look like
I never saw your smile
But in my mind the image
Makes it all worthwhile
I know the kind of person
You seem to me to be
And that is good enough, my friend
To love eternally
Wrong place, wrong time it would appear
And that’s what saddens me
For in another time and place
Perhaps another year
If only I hadn’t found your love
If to me this made no sense
The thoughts and feelings I have now
Would be directed somewhere else
I know you’re sorry, if you hurt me
That’s something you could never do
The hurt I feel is my own doing
It comes from loving you
I’m leaving now to go away
To be where I belong
That empty screen another will fill
With whom you can “singalong”
So I thank you for your friendship
You’re guidance always fair
And wish you well in all you do
Goodnight, God bless, take care
Brian
To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.
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