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-- also known as the Aggressive House Spider! installment 1!
first, i will enlighten you all with the BEAST living in the corner of my bathroom, which i have discovered this morning. then, i'm going to make you all laugh .. or else think i'm a wus. either or, i have to balance my lame drama's with something funny!
the agressive house spider (hobo spider): http://hobospider.org/
(please note his little BOXING GLOVE-LIKE things, thanks. these will come up momentarily. there will be a quiz.)
so i am in the shower about a half hour ago. just minding my own. usually when the shampooing ritual comes up, my face is toward the ceiling, however my eyes are closed. it's relaxing, you know?! anyways, for some reason i open them, and i had already BEEN in the shower for like 10 minutes, doing the moisterising rituals and washing my face, etc.
and THERE HE IS. i dare say, if i didn't know any better, it's the same beast from LAST SUMMER/FALL who haunted the bathroom until i managed to catch the thing. normally i am a spider killer without remorse, except these are big and i don't want to deal with the post-mortem death goo.
so it's just hanging there, and it's almost like RIGHT when i notice the thing, he decides to move. but oh! not JUST move ... he POSTURES. these things POSTURE. he crept down the wall (meanwhile i'm frozen with a head full of shampoo), he perches on the spot where the wall meets the shower-tile things (it's like a little ledge), and then he POSTURES.
what i mean by THAT is that he LIFTS HIS FRONT LEGS AT ME, he WIGGLES THEM IN A "COME ON LETS GO, PUNK!" kind of manner, and therefore his LITTLE BOXING GLOVES ARE TOTALLY ON DISPLAY. and i was like, "I KNOW YOU DID NOT JUST DO THAT???" and then shiloh, in the living room, says, "i'm not doing anything!!!" which i'd have laughed at if i wasn't currently wondering HOW i am going to finish rinsing and i still had to SHAVE.
of course, the spot where i have to leg perch TO shave, is RIGHT UNDER this tile corner that hobo-spider has claimed as his.
so it goes on like this: every move i make, he makes two: left-left, right-right, wave-front-legs, repeat (it's their fighting dance type .. thing). i don't know how i even managed TO shave, considering i never ONCE watched wtf i was doing.
so then it's time to get out, and i have to shake the water off the curtain and all of that, which ... causes not only a little breeze backward, but ALSO scatters water droplets.
he did NOT like that. he came creeping down the tiles, which were wet, then FELL RIGHT BY MY FEET. i jumped SO fast and like cleared the edge of the tub with a foot to spare. none too soon, he manages his way back up this one corner of the tub, and is currently resting in the corner of the tub-against-wall edge, probably until the walls dry and he can CLAIM HIS THRONE.
stay tuned for part two. 
my void does not want.
-- 2.13.61.
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the dance with the TEGENARIA AGRESTIS --
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Re: the dance with the TEGENARIA AGRESTIS --
By: jaman on Sun, 23 November 2003 18:52 |
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Heathyr, dear...
By: lenny on Sun, 23 November 2003 19:49 |
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Actually...
By: setras on Sun, 23 November 2003 20:09 |
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Was gonna reply, "thank you for proving my point"...
By: lenny on Sun, 23 November 2003 21:10 |
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LENNY!!!!!!!!!
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Re: Actually...
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Re: Actually...
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little?!?!??!
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Re: little?!?!??!
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okay, here's how the phobia began.
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Re: okay, here's how the phobia began.
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Re: Heathyr, dear...
By: jaman on Mon, 24 November 2003 13:20 |
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why, thank you, syyton!
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