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There doesn't seem to have been much activity round here this weekend...
I feel like a bastard at the moment because I told a very old friend I was gay and he said that he was surprised, as he remembered that I made a homophobic comment years and years ago (when I must have been 13 or 14) and assumed I was homophobic. Except that he couldn't remember the details and wasn't sure what I was referring to... so he assumed I was talking about homosexuality in general. Whereas it occurs to me that I could have been talking about the mechanics of sex, or the promiscuity of some of the people at my school, neither of which I have been very happy about historically. Or I could have made a comment to try and deflect attention from myself - something I realise now is probably rather an unpleasant thing to do... but I imagine most of us have done it at some point?
I suppose things like that happen... things you don't remember ever saying will jump up and bite you years afterwards. Things that could have affected the way that people looked at you for years.
When I look back on the way I've behaved in the past, I wish I could go back and change it all. Re-run my life from 13 onwards. I suppose that's what becoming an adult is all about... realising that one cannot take anything for granted, and one can never assume that simply because something means nothing to one it means nothing to everyone else. One should never say something simply because it is the "easy" thing to say.
David
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