|
|
|
|
Death of an old friend
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair and, maybe, it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Panadol, sun lotion or a sticking plaster to a pupil - but could not inform the parents when a pupil became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
He is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else is to Blame, and I'm A Victim.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realised he was gone.
If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
I dream of boys with big bulges in their trousers,
Never of girls with big bulges in their blouses.
…and look forward to meeting you in Cóito.
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
The Death of an Old Friend
By: Nigel on Mon, 29 May 2006 08:27 |
|
|
Re: The Death of an Old Friend
By: NW on Mon, 29 May 2006 11:08 |
|
|
Re: The Death of an Old Friend
By: Nigel on Mon, 29 May 2006 11:26 |
|
|
Plagiarism!
By: Deeej on Mon, 29 May 2006 17:56 |
|
|
Re: Plagiarism!
By: Nigel on Mon, 29 May 2006 18:05 |
|
|
Re: Plagiarism!
By: Deeej on Mon, 29 May 2006 18:14 |
|
|
Re: Plagiarism!
By: NW on Mon, 29 May 2006 18:33 |
|
 |
Re: The Death of an Old Friend
|
|
|
Old friend? Old enemy, more like!
By: Deeej on Mon, 29 May 2006 11:35 |
|
|
Re: Old friend? Old enemy, more like!
By: NW on Mon, 29 May 2006 14:02 |
|
|
Common Sense: his colleagues remember him ...
By: NW on Mon, 29 May 2006 12:27 |
|
|
Re: Common Sense: his colleagues remember him ...
By: Nigel on Mon, 29 May 2006 18:13 |
|
|
It's because we've already been discussing this
By: Deeej on Mon, 29 May 2006 18:20 |
|
|
Re: It's because we've already been discussing this
By: Nigel on Mon, 29 May 2006 18:29 |
|
|
Re: It's because we've already been discussing this
By: Deeej on Mon, 29 May 2006 18:42 |
|
|
Re: It's because we've already been discussing this
By: Nigel on Mon, 29 May 2006 21:09 |
|
|
Odd
By: Deeej on Mon, 29 May 2006 21:58 |
|
|
I think I have to side with Nigel on this one.
By: cossie on Tue, 30 May 2006 00:55 |
|
|
Re: I think I have to side with Nigel on this one.
By: NW on Tue, 30 May 2006 01:44 |
|
|
Re:Belated reply
By: Nigel on Tue, 30 May 2006 06:23 |
|
|
Re:Belated reply - I still can't get it to work.
By: Nigel on Tue, 30 May 2006 06:53 |
|
|
Common sense
|
|
|
No hard feelings, I hope!
By: Deeej on Tue, 30 May 2006 15:31 |
|
|
Re: No hard feelings, I hope!
By: Nigel on Tue, 30 May 2006 21:18 |
|
|
Our definitions differ
By: Deeej on Tue, 30 May 2006 21:35 |
|
|
Re:Belated reply
By: NW on Tue, 30 May 2006 11:38 |
|
|
Re:Belated reply
By: Nigel on Tue, 30 May 2006 15:43 |
|
|
Re:Belated reply
By: NW on Tue, 30 May 2006 16:15 |
|
|
Re:Belated reply
By: Nigel on Tue, 30 May 2006 21:40 |
|
|
Re:Belated reply
|
|
|
Re:Belated reply
|
|
|
Can't we all adopt a common sense view ...
By: cossie on Wed, 31 May 2006 02:57 |
|
|
Re: Can't we all adopt a common sense view ...
By: Nigel on Wed, 31 May 2006 07:09 |
|
|
Re: Can't we all adopt a common sense view ...
By: NW on Wed, 31 May 2006 10:33 |
|
|
Cossie, I must fault you
By: Deeej on Wed, 31 May 2006 12:31 |
|
|
Fault me? FAULT ME???!!!
By: cossie on Fri, 02 June 2006 02:21 |
|
|
Fault you!
By: Deeej on Fri, 02 June 2006 09:30 |
|
|
Deeej, O Deeej ....
By: cossie on Sun, 04 June 2006 02:56 |
|
|
Re: Deeej, O Deeej ....
|
|
|
Whatch that you're shaying, grandshon ...?
By: cossie on Sun, 04 June 2006 03:38 |
|
|
Re: Deeej, O Deeej ....
By: Deeej on Sun, 04 June 2006 12:34 |
|
|
Well, while we're on the subject
By: JFR on Sun, 04 June 2006 13:15 |
|
|
In that case...
By: Deeej on Sun, 04 June 2006 13:36 |
|
|
Yum, yum...
By: cossie on Mon, 05 June 2006 02:05 |
Goto Forum:
[  ] |
A Place of Safety
Search
Help
Register
Login
Home
