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timmy
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Has no life at all |
Location: UK, in Devon
Registered: February 2003
Messages: 13825
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This was a question that Neil asked me over lunch. I find it a very hard question to answer. I went down the "usual" road of "When you grew up you knew with all certainty that you were heterosexual, knew that you expected to have sex with girls and knew it would be what you wanted."
He surprised me a little by telling me that he never really ever knew what sex was going to be like, though he did, sort of, assume it was always going to happen and be somewhat better than his right hand. And he said that there is no way he, for example, would have been able to say that he were heterosexual unless he had tried it out and found it to be excellent.
Now I grew up confidently expecting to have sex with girls and to be heterosexual. I had sex with girls. It was not unpleasant. It was fairly fulfilling. I assumed that I was a "heterosexual person who liked my fellow teenage boys too." And that assumption continued until my late forties when I realised that I was a homosexual person who happened to be married to a lovely lady.
But it does come back to that question, one I find hard to answer: "How do you know that you are gay?"
Author of Queer Me! Halfway Between Flying and Crying - the true story of life for a gay boy in the Swinging Sixties in a British all male Public School
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