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AZ Story Guy's "Never Forget,"   [message #69874] Sat, 04 July 2015 00:39 Go to previous message
larkin is currently offline  larkin

Toe is in the water
Location: Massachusetts
Registered: June 2015
Messages: 58

AZ Story Guy,

I've read your first two chapters of "Never Forget" I can tell that there is more to come so it would not be fair for me to launch a critique on an unfinished work.
I did read the "prescript" where the author explains his methods to the reader.  Although not serious, it comes off as a bit of a spoiler.  I would opt for trusting your readers and if they don't get it, consider some restructuring or a literary device to clue them in.  If the story requires ambiguity, the loose ends might be dealt with in a postscript.
What I see happening here is something more that run of the mill flash-backs.  I am reminded of Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse Five where time is fluid.   The main character is searching for himself.

I generally look for the positive and I especially like the diamond in the rough.  I also don't give a shit about spelling errors.

So AZ Story Guy, I like what you have so far. 

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